Sunday, January 2, 2005

The Phantom Of The Opera
well i just came back from seing The Phantom of the opera. it was awesome. the graphics were gorgeous. the story was sad as hell. i cried. yea i admit it i cried make fun of me, i dare you, make me hate you, i know all you humans are the same. the last time i cried was in 6th grade when i thereatened my mom.

well back to the story. its about a boy was was born with a deformed face and was thought of as a freak. he was shunned by humans. he was grown with music. he then grows into a great opera singer. well he fell in love with a a girl who thought he was her angel of music sent by her late dad. he was always helping her out. he loved her dearly. she then got with another man. it broke his heart he then became crazy. he wanted he he thought he owned her. he knew that she wouldn't love him because of his horrible face. he has always been in the shadows of the opera house. he was raised in the opera house. he was an angel who looked like a demon and was going through hell. he told her that. he gave her a choice to get with him and spare her lover or not chose him and lose her lover. she understood him and told him that she didn't fear him for his face but his insanity. it opened his eyes and let her go with her lover.

this movie reminded me of my life. i was raised in the darkness. i was mocked and made fun of. i have learned to distrust humans. i have been hated because of being too "perky" in 6th garde. i then became satanic and turned my back on religion. i turned my back on everyone. i despice everyone for what they have done to me. he is me in the future. i will go crazy . i cried when i saw when she chose the other guy. i admit it i cried. do what everyone else will do when they find out...laugh, mock me, despice me, think i'm gay. be like everyone. be like the people i hate. be like the people the phantom hates. well the movie was awesome the musicals were really cool. The only person i know that wont make fun of me for crying and having teddy bears is my g/f Sakura18. yea i have teddy bears yea make fun of me. i dare you. critisize me. i fucking dare you.


I have never trusted any humans for what they have done to me.

I have never known a human that hasn't made fun of me. i dont trust them. well make fun of me...i dare you.




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Saturday, January 1, 2005

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!
Happy New Years day everybody!!!!! well this year i will try not to bemy depressed anti-social self. i have deleted all my past post so i can only look at the future. I will make my g/f happy. i will do whatever it takes to make her happy ^.^ I love her very much. I would do anything to make her happy. well new years was pretty good. this year started of awesome. me and my g/f were very lovey duvey and stuff ^^ well i will not be my regular self ever again. i will strive to make my g/f happy and that will always keep me going strong. i may have my off days but nothing that will change my attitude. i will not be suicidal anymore. i will try to get back into Catholicism. i will try to believe in christ (even tho i have said evil things about him and will probably still be going to hell) well as long as i make my g/f happy then there is nothing else to worry about. I would go through hell to make my g/f happy. i would die a million painful deaths if that is what will make her happy. well happy new years everyone ^^ hope you have an awesome day.
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