Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Of Romance and Laptops
It's a bit out of the ordinary for me to write a "real life" post like this, but I feel like it explains a few things that need to be explained. At least, it puts things in a specific context, or gives me an excuse for not being online much these days -- or something?

So, I guess it all started about three years ago when we got our brand new "top of the line" eMachine brand computer from my Dad. My inability to keep my finances in order comes from both of my parents, but my poor judgement in making large purchases comes directly from him. If you do not know what an "eMachine" is do not fret, for most people have never heard of such a thing. It is an off-brand of computer hardware that is sold exclsuively through Best Buy, and is notorious for putting together junky products. I did not complain about my new eMachine though, because I was just thrilled to have something remotely up-to-date (my last machine was an old Macintosh Performa.)

For the next three years I struggled with my baby, spending countless hours trying to find creative solutions to it's many, many problems. The mouse doesn't work anymore? That's okay, I know enough shortcuts to get by without it for a while. Adobe products cause my computer to violently spasm? Well, who needs Adobe then! My eMachine came with a handful of off-brand graphic arts programs that I eventually mastered.

But early last week it all seemed so futile. It finally decided to stop working entirely. Since the warranty had conveniently run out earlier in the year (coincidence, or conspiracy? You tell me) there was no clear solution aboutwhat to do. My computer skills are fairly meager, and even though I'm sure it could be jury-rigged through another semester I didn't have the heart to put it through anymore pain.

I decided that it was time for me to buy my own computer; the only catch is that name brand electronics require quite a bit of cash to pay for ^_^" After looking into a few different ways of paying for it, I decided that I would have to pay for it through credit and by the year 2023 the payments would be complete. So I head over to Best Buy, and after a lengthy discussion with the cashier I discover that my credit card is $180 over the limit.

The only thing is that I don't use my credit card for anything; my parents do. They made me apply for the card last semester to help cover my costs at school, only they never actually got around to making payments for it. As a direct result of this, I wasn't able to enroll in classes this most recent semester. Of course, my parents don't actually know about this because they threatened to take away my car if I ever dropped out of or failed college. For about three hours on Tuesday-Friday I leave the house and drive around SoCal aimlessly, meanwhile everyone thinks I am busy at school.

*sigh* It's a terrible thing to do, I know. But my options seemed very limited at the time. I'm hoping to get a second job in the near future and take over payments of my car before they find out about "fake school." Coincidentally, "fake spring break" is coming up for me next week, so I should be able to spend more time online.

Using my savings I was able to get a nice little HP Pavillion laptop, and today is my first day of using the thing. Hopefully I will be able to chat with certain people over AIM again, most notably the current object of my affection.

No, it's not anyone you know. I know them from work, but due to our very random schedules it seems like we communicate more online than we do in real life, which might not be a bad thing. When I have feelings for a person I find it very difficult to communicate with them verbally, so in these little AIM chats I come across as being much more intelligent and charming than I am in real life.

He's not the love of my life, at least not yet, but he's one of the closest friends I have ever had. As much as I value my friendships with females (and straight males) it's just nice to have someone who you can talk to about the things you've never been able to talk about.

So yeah, I have a terible history of getting attached to my close friends and this situation is no different. We've had "the conversation" and sadly the feelings are not mutual, so for the past few weeks that has been putting me in a depressed mood. I'm not used to having "the conversation," most of the people I love never even knew how I felt about them, or the feelings were mutual and some annoying circumstances prevented anything from ever happening.

Now every time I seem him is a reminder of how I put him in an awkward situation, and probably messed up our friendship. It is very frustrating at times, but it's just another thing I have to deal with in the endless string of annoyances that make up life.

On another negative note: The Otaku Awards were totally completed until my computer died last week. I remember some of the results, but some of the less popular categories need to be recounted. It would be appreciated if a few people were to volunteer and speed up the proccess, but I understand if everyone wants me to get them done by myself. The fact that the results haven't been posted yet is a big thorn in the online side of Josh, and I'm sorry to disappoint everyone by now having them out yet, bleh. Patience is a virtue, my friends. (Do I even have any online friends anymore? That's probably my fault as well.)

Work is going well. I got a semi-promotion in the sense that I will be training new people who come to work on the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, and next week I'll be learning my second attraction: Splash Mountain. It's very exciting to finally operate another ride after so much time on Pooh, and I'm looking forward to the change of pace.
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