Monday, April 26, 2004

theOtaku.com: What Saiyuki Bishounen Are You?
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   MIDGETRY



short ones
stumpy ones
ones you like to kick
black ones
white ones
ones that make you sick
round ones
skinny ones
some with a big red nose
fat ones
small ones
this poem really blows



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   MIDGET MOLESTING


i got molested by a midget
i was quite drunk
she did naughty things
this person who was shrunk
her tiny little hands
in places not right
i shiver to remember
it was a horrible sight
her tiny little fingers
i couldnt slap them away
it felt kinda good
in a weird odd way
the midget she persisted
i ran away in the end
it was scary and dirty
i dont think i may ever mend



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   MIDGET SEX


guess whos back
yup its the midget
always barking at my window
poor little guy...
id give him a doggy treat if i had one
or at least tease him with it
how do midgets have sex?
have you ever wondered about this?
id think theyd hafta be on top
or else you might squish em
wouldnt that be nasty
scuse me doc but can you remove this for me?
young lady dont you know midget sex is bad for you?
they can get stuck in uncomfortable places..
how would you explain that to your mom???
hey mom guess what..
nope cant see doing that



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theOtaku.com: What Neko Are You?
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   DAY AT THE PARK


the midget went to the park one day
to have a little fun
he tried to play on the swings
but couldnt reach
the merry-go-round made him sick
and the 4 year olds beat him up
the parents kept asking questions
like where his mommie was
so he got mad and left
and was ran over by a scooter
he was almost but not quite killed..
too bad.. i'll have to try harder next time..




theOtaku.com: What Anime Angel Are You?
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   WALMART MIDGET
i went to walmart and guess what i saw
a cute little midget about 4 feet tall
she loved my hair and asked the color
i said it was red an it cost just a dollar
she walked all funny like a duck
waddle waddle.... what the fuck
i started wondering where she shopped
the kids department she prolly stopped
lil pants an lil shoes
lots of dollies dont forget the booze
as she waddled away she waved an said thanks mack
i gave her the finger, smiled an waved back
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   MIDGET DATING
i saw that midget the other day
he was trying to scare me
he was dressed as a clown
with a rainbow wig
and big floppy shoes
and a red nose an suspenders
he didnt look much different
except his hair was more frizzy
he had on makeup
but looked like a girl
i was impressed
i tried to set him up with my brother
he doesnt seem to like me much
but thats ok the feeling is mutual
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   PARTY CLOWN MIDGET
i went to a party for kids
there was a party clown there
he looked at me with his evil eyes
the stupid painted smile cracked
i couldnt help it
i dont know what came over me
i kicked him
right where his shin should have been
he fell
it was a midget
on stilts
how scary
so i kicked him again
he sprayed me with water from his stupid flower
so i slapped the painted smile
i got makeup all over my hand
so i kicked him in the nuts
hes a mime now...
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   MIDGET TRAP PART 3
my traps are getting devious
as i look for another way
to take apart that little guy
and definitely make him pay
the trip wires are hidden in the dirt
snares set to grab
land mines as a friendly gesture
sharp pointy things that like to stab
i will catch him oh yes i will
this is my most biggest goal
to fail in this will be amiss
i will catch that ugly troll
he creeps and sneaks
with demonly stealth and guile
i snicker to myself and pull the rope
the box sweeps down and i have to smile
a tiny little midget to pass the time
dressing him up in baby clothes
plucking out fingernails
stomping on toes
the trap is sprung
the fun begins
his howls and whines
furnish my grins
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   MIDGET TRAP PART 2
the midgets tries to sneak across my yard
hes quiet as a mouse
but i have my midget trap ready
i knew hed come back
hes still trying to steal my windchimes
the lil bastard
he creeps across the grass
and trips over a wire
the cage opens
and a big dog comes and bites him
and then when hes laying there crying
for mercy he wont get
i hold the windchimes just out of reach
and hit him in the knee with a spare brick
thatll teach him to quit stealing
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   MIDGET TRAP PART 1
the midget walked slowly
but not slow enough
the trap sprang
oh poor midget
there goes his toes
so he tried to crawl
oops another trap
there goes his knees
crying and crawling
he wiggles away
oops theres another
hes now a girl
rolling away s/he goes on
and oops there goes his arms
poor midget hes still rolling
no arms to get in the way
oops theres a trap
and the head goes on
or off
depending on your point of view
i stand and laugh
oh look another midget
i really should take the sign down
midget wanted is so misleading
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   MIDGETS IN THE NIGHT
its out there again..
that damn midget..
hes trying to steal my windchimes..
hehe good thing he cant reach
its kinda funny
he jumps and misses..
jump... miss
he used a chair once
still couldn't get it..
jump.. chair moved... crash
too funny
if i was nice i'd give it to him
good thing im not nice
i wonder how they taste..
bet its like chicken
mmmm yummy
next time he falls hes mine
show no mercy
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