Saturday, September 24, 2005

	Major updating. Lots.. I need to make the inner background and menu back ground clear. Can somebody help me? Made by:Animes-sins.com

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Saturday, August 20, 2005

I GIVE THEE!!
Here's an untitled poem that took me three minutes to write. I don't like it because I used to many of the same words to often.

Untitled

Screaming and grieving over you,
Some how it just ends the same,
No matter what I do,
It all relates to you,
My mind is flooding,
I'm starting to break down,
I can't stand it,
I want to kill it all away,
But I'm just not sure what to do..
Nor am I sure of what to say,

This scream I cannot hear,
Every thing isn't so clear,
My eyes are betraying me,
As they sting with regret,
My heart is heavy with betrayal,
And I just want this to fade to black,
I'm sick of it all,
I wanna forget,
But I'm afraid to lose it all,

These chaotic emotions,
They make me confused,
I hide behind this false smile,
It's the only thing I can do,
I don't want to hurt you,
But I just can't go on pretending,

It's killing me,
Deep down inside,
I'm hiding,
You won't find me here,
Let me tell you it's okay one more time,
And watch as you turn away, thinking it's all true,
Why can't you hear my cry?!
Is it to loud for you?!
Or are you pretending,
Like you did back then,
Screaming at me when you learned,
What I really did...

This pain, it's so surreal,
Why can't I feel?
My hearts as hard as a stone when I'm near,
But when I'm alone, you can't see these tears,
They are mine to keep,
Mine to share,
I like to hide,
Why can't you understand?

I'm not sure how to act,
I'm not sure what to do,
These scars I hide,
And I go on day by day,
Acting as if nothing happened,

I'm breaking down,
Deep inside,
This is killing me,
I'm hiding,

And it's my little white lie...
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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

READ!!
These Tears Are Hollow]

[Chapter One]
I bent low and snatched up another hanger, trying to block out the yelling from the other room. Why my mother married that man, I will never know. Heaving a sigh, I turned up my music and went on with cleaning my room. Despite my moms new husband being a total jack ass, life was nice, I guess. Regardless of being the person everyone hated in school, it was kind of okay. You learn to get used to it.
Well, I did any ways, thought I hated being lonely.
"Motoko!" My mothers voice shattered through my thoughts and I stood up straight, blinking curiously.
"YES, DEAREST MOTHER OF MINE?!" I grinned broadly. I couldn't help it...It slipped. She rolled her eyes and shook her head.
"Hurry up and get ready, your gonna be late for the fashion shoot." She wandered out of the room and I glanced over at the clock.
"Oh, yes, the fashion shoot." I skipped happily out of my room, dusting off my Victorian style skirt and followed my mother. Another reason why every one seemed to hate me, I was a model. So what? It's not like I chose this type of life style! It kind of started with my mom, we needed money...so...she sent me out to a model try out. And what do ya know?! They liked my 'style' and 'grace'. Yeah...grace...HA! That's brilliant!
"Oh, geez,"My mother grumbled, pointing to the car door. I blinked and slipped inside the car. Before I knew it, time has slipped away, and we were at the fashion shoot.
"We're so glad your here, Yumemite-san!" One of the assistants grabbed my hand and quickly whisked me inside.
"Whoa! Slow down, boys, I don't like you that way!" I cried as I was quickly pushed into the make-up and clothes room. I stopped, my mouth hanging slightly open, and stared at the rack of clothes. Horrid, wretched colors! I can't even believe...oh....god...
"Here, put this on," The other assistant handed be a light pink dress that was frilly in every way imaginable.
"No way!" I shoved it back into his hands and he blinked at me, looking slightly taken aback. "Pink is for the preps." I growled, crossing my arms over my chest. "Don't you dare think I'm gonna wear the horrid color!!"
"B-but...Yumemite-san, we have no one else!!" The assistants protested. The photographer peered over the ladder he had just climbed off of and raised a brow.
"What is it?" He inquired, leaning against the ladder. The first assistant blinked and looked down at me, then up to the photographer, the dress still in his hands.
"S-she won't wear it, sir!" He whined. I scowled slightly and put a hand on my hip, pointing an accusing finger towards the rack.
"I don't wear pink! It's in my contract!!" I protested.
"You have a contract?" The photographer raised his eye brows, skepticism clearly sketched across his face. I opened my mouth to respond but then..hesitated.
"No, no I don't! But I'll get one!!" I watched as the photographer neared me. He smiled sweetly and shoved the dress into my arms. I blinked.
"Well, until then, if you still want to make money..." He let the sentence hang and turned away from me. I huffed and turned away from him, stalking back into the dressing room. If my mom wasn't so poor, I swear I wouldn't have taken this gig! My mother pulled on the bow tightly and glared at me.
"Do you always have to embarrass me?" She growled dangerously into my ear. I smiled sweetly and hugged her.
"I love you, mommy." I smiled again as she started to fume and I skipped out of the room towards make-up. So far, so good!
----------
"I have arrived!" I laughed and burst into the store. I stood in the door way of the coffee shop, peering around curiously. Ah..My eyes landed on a small girl, whose pale skin seemed to glow magnificently, her eyes glowed brilliantly. Her black curls fell around her face and perfectly framed it, it almost look like a halo. I gasped.
"Oh my!"I exclaimed as I bounced up to the counter. I looked up at the menu, my top hat falling back, and put my hands on my hips. "I think..I'll have a French vanilla frapichino, if you please!" I smiled and tilted my head. She nodded and started to fix the drink.
"Here you go miss," Her voice was soft and delicate, like wind chimes. Beautiful...I smiled and accepted it.
"You know," I leaned forward and glanced around then lowered my voice into a dramatic whisper as my eyes burned into her midnight blue orbs, "you would make a wonderful model!" She blinked and pointed to herself, her eyes widening.
"M-me?" She stammered. "Y-you must mistaken." A look of disbelief flashed in her eyes and I shook my head.
"No way!" I laughed. "Your simply gorgeous! Your complexion, your deep blue eyes! Men would be taken with you in an instant!!" I snapped my fingers to emphasize 'instant'. A light blush spread across her cheeks as she looked at me. People who were in the shop began looking at us curiously, wondering what was all the commotion about.
"Do you really think so??"
"I know so!" I grinned and stuck out a hand. She shook it, a soft smile on her face. "I think I'll take you up on that offer miss...?"
"Motoko Yumemite!" I smiled warmly.
"I'm Mii, Mii Mizuhara, but you may call Mii-chan," She stated sweetly.
"Okay Mii-chan!!" I took a long drink of the frapichino. "Aaaaaaaah, that's good."
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Saturday, July 2, 2005

   Sunburned and aching
Oh, yeah, I went to six flags and had a great time! One problem...I got sun burned and my legs hurt. It pays to be a red head.
Any ways, about my song..(lithium) I'm not sure if I should change it or not...because, I mean, because it really does go with the theme (JtHM) and if you read the lyrics...it sounds like Nny and then it sounds like Nny when he fell in love with Devi!
I'm so happy because today
I've found my friends ...
They're in my head
I'm so ugly but that's okay cause so are you...
We've broken our mirrors
Sunday morning is everyday for all I care...
And I'm not scared
Light my candles in a daze...
Cause I've found god hey hey hey
I'm so lonely but that's okay I shaved my head...
And I'm not sad
And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard...
But I'm not sure
I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there...
But I don't care
I'm so horny but that's okay...
My will is good - hey, hey, hey
I like it - I'm not gonna crack
I miss you - I'm not gonna crack
I love you - I'm not gonna crack
I kill you - I'm not gonna crack
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Sunday, June 19, 2005

   La la la...s...o.o
Eh heh...new here ^^'' Sad, sad. Well, I'm not really new...I joined months ago but didn't use it until now...weird. Any ways, I have to submit some drawings...yep...
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