Wednesday, January 16, 2008

janurary 16 2oo8

current mood:

Stressed to the point of puking

WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!

Stop trying to fucking rule my life! Stop! I know what I'm doing and I certainly know that I did, at one time, WANT THIS! But now that you got fucking thrown into the mix, this shit has gone down hill to fucking fast. I'm sorry I couldn't be what you wanted and I'm sorry YOU are such a two-faced lying bitch. Three things:
a) I do know what I want. What I want is for you to be more open-minded and open up to the fact that I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND
b) Life experience, excuse me? Since when didn't I have any of that? Babe, I have more life experience then you could ever hope to have when you were my age. And, sorry, I'm not gonna go out and fuck a guy to gain more "life experience." Fuck you!
c) Since when was being bi-sexual/gay unhealthy?!I'M NOT DYING. INFACT, YOU ARE THE ONE MAKING ME SO UNHEALTHY!!
Are you smiling victoriously? Are you happy that I'm so unhappy? Haha. I bet you are. Don't you lie to me, I know that you're happy.. Deep down inside you're drowning in it.

PARDON THAT SUDDEN OUTBURST!

I am so stressed out right now that I keep feeling bile rise in the back of my throat. Haha! YEAH! Delicious, innit?

My girlfriend told her parents about us and basically, our whole relationship was riding on her parents and if they agreed or disagreed with my mom. My mom's rules are "no type of communication whatsoever outside of school. no seeing each other at other peoples house, none of it." aaaand Birt's parents seemed okay with us dating until last night. And her mom pulled the SAME EXACT BULLSHIT my mom did. I am so livid. I am so sick. I don't know what do.

I love her, I want to date her, I don't want to hurt her but at the same time I don't think NOW is the best time to be dating. Not in the least...

Parents suck.

Good news? Got my permit. Yipee skipee.
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Monday, January 7, 2008

janurary o7 2oo8

current mood:
Sad

I just finished the Paradise Kiss series. It makes me sad to know that there might not be anything left.. and what happened to Yukari and George.. I really wish they got together! I mean.. They didn't get along, and Yukari cried in like... every fucking manga but still! -sighs.- But still... I'm very sad that the series is over. I went through a lot to obtain the last three manga. OKay, not really, but I searched many stores to get them! And when I found them my heart was pounding. Hee hee!

I'm glad Arashi and Miwako are okay, though. They're my favorite characters. They remind me so much of Cicada (my g/f's charrie) and Zero (my charrie) that it's not even funny! It's cute though. I was shocked by what I read in the fifth manga. I can't believe Arashi did that!! And Miwako..! I started sobbing. I get to emotional over manga. Like, right now, I feel as if I'm going to cry because it's over.

I demand sequels!!

Heehee. I feel like making a Paradise Kiss character now. Or like, next generation charries. Arashi and Miwako all ready had a girl but, if I do make ng chara's, I'm probably not gonna have Erica (they're kid) in it. I'm all ready thinking of fanfictions. @_@ But, yeah. =] The main characters will be Arashi and Miwako's son, who looks exactly like Arashi minus the pink eyes! 8D And George's girl, who looks EXACTLY like him.

Ha! Other I create most likely won't be from any other ParaKiss couples or anything.

I should be studying for my permit right now or doing homework, but I really don't feel like it. I feel like writing. And drawing. =P I'm taking my permit test tomorrow, though, so I DO have to study...

Anyone know where I can find a bubblegum pink wig? I'mma be cosplaying as Miwako for the anime convention. Hee hee. I need an Arashi! ^^

xxx
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Sunday, January 6, 2008

janurary o6 2oo8

current mood:
Hungry

Wow.. the year went by so incredibly fast, huh? I feel so old all of the sudden!! Dang! Haha. I didn't really do anything special on Christmas or New Years, so.. not really gonna talk about that! How about them apples?!

How do you guys like my new layout, btw? =] I like it very much. ^^

I dunno what to talk about... Um...

For the ani-con I really wanna cosplay as Miwako from ParaKiss so I may just do that. =P!! And I'm in love with a new band called Jack Off Jill...^^

And I'm hungry.

THAT'S IT! JA! Lol

xxx
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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

december 18 2oo7
aka: seven more days until I get to watch fight club!

current mood:
anxious xP

Well, I'm going to redo my site. I dunno with what but I do know what song I'mma put on here, as long as I can find it. =D Have you guys heard of Music is my Boyfriend by Skye Sweetnam? She is ridiculously hot. Jesus Christ. -swoons.- Buuuut, I like the Cansei De Ser Sexy cover better. (I think that's the name?) and their version is called "Music is my Hot Hot Sex." Weeellll, at least I think they covered it.

So, perhaps when I redo my layout, I can fix my comment link. I bet a lot of you would like that. Ha ha.

I can't text on my cellphone and it's starting to piss me off. Cingular said unlimited texting was ten bucks a month, right? So, my mom calls to see what's up and they were like "WELL UNLIMITED TEXTING IS THIRTY BUCKS!" uuuhm... so why did you say ten?! Dumbnuts. But, it's really starting to annoy me. I want to text. I want to recieve texts. Without that, I can't register on the cingular website and get my ringback tones and my ringtones. DD: WHHHHY?!

I've also been playing pokemanz a lot lately. I used to have the yellow version but I lost it so Anastasia gave me hers for Christ-mas. IT'S GREAT. I forgot how addicting that game way! Omfjc! That's all I did today! I was playing it in like.. every class. ON A GAMEBOY COLOR! and have yet to get caught.

HAHA! I'm off to play it naw!

And I'm sorry for the lack of responses on my PMs. I'll get to those soon. 8D

xxx
Tori
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Sunday, December 16, 2007

december 16 2oo7
aka: nine more days until I get to watch fight club!

current mood:
shitty. shitty. shitty..

haha.

My family hates me. I'm pretty damn sure. My grandma, last night, said she was fine with me being bi-sexual but turned around this morning and was like, "I hope you'll change your mind..." and "you have to tell your grandpa." -snorts.- Like I'M ever going to tell my grandpa. And why the hell would I fucking change my mind?! If I could, wouldn't you think I would have by now?! >/

And my mom found out about my girlfriend. Because she was looking through my shit. And we had a huge, huge, HUGE blowout which ended with me crying myself to sleep then getting kicked out of the house to go over to my grandmas. >/ I said some mean things to my mom that I kinda regret. Why should I regret it, though? I'm not in the wrong here, she is! She was like "you're not allowed to see her. ever again. you're not spending the night over there, you're not talking to her on the phone. no, you're done seeing her." That's what she thinks. And then she expected me to go shopping with her after that. Wtf?! I told her I'd go but then she was like "are you going to get my present?" "No, you don't deserve a Christmas present." Ha ha. I feel bad for it because she looked a bit sad buuuut..

And then I went to bed and my grandma came over. And I confessed to her and she was like "I just want you to be happy.. even if that means having a girlfriend." (now she wants me to change my mind). And we had a little intervention with my mom and she was like "stop being such a drama queen, Tori." Yep. Yeeeep. Me, the drama queen. What the fuck am I supposed to do?! It's not my fault she's in denial. I bet she went out last night and got shit faced drunk to forget all that happened.

Aaaah, but she did get me a cell phone. Which made me really happy. For a few hours anyways. Now I'm angsting again and feeling sick and ugh...

What am I going to do? My mom never really liked Birt before but now she absolutely hates her. AND THINKS WE FUCKED. Wth?! And if she doesn't warm up to the fact that I have a g/f, she won't let me see her outside of school. Which may... lead to our breakup. I don't want that and I'm willing to work on the relationship....

as long as she is....

If you guys don't see me on for a while, it's probably because I'm hiding in my room from my mom. Call my cellphone if you have the number.
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Monday, December 10, 2007

december 1o 2oo7
aka: fifteen more days until I get to watch fight club!

current mood:

What the fuck? xDD (and amused)

My mom and I just had a really funny discussion. I was talking to myself and changing my aka thing and I was all "lesseeee...fifteen more days until I get to watch Fight Club...!" and she started giggling. So, I looked over to her and I was like "o___o what?" and she goes "You're an odd child."
Me: Because I count down the days until I get to watch Fight Club? Not the days until Christ-mas?
Mom: Yes. Your friends must think your strange...
Me: Oh well! I mean, c'mon, it's Fight Club!! I haven't seen it in a year and I've been dying to see it for three months.
Mom: -giggle.-
Me: Do I amuse you?
Mom: You're an odd child...

xDDD And then we both laughed. Am I weird for counting down the days until I get to see Fight Club? ...NAH!! Wtf. It's a good movie AND Brad Pitt is super hot in that movie. JEEEZUS! Mmmm.

And, like.. is it weird to have a TMNT yaoi fetish? Ha ha. It bends my brain, especially this girl. It's just like "agh... why can't they make TMNT into humans?!"

RaphxLeo
RaphxLeo

There's more but.. jeezus.. my brain is so... -ded- It's delicious. ¢¾ ¢¾ ¢¾ I have this weakness for Leonardo too because he, along with the White Ranger, where my first ever crushes. Even though Leonardo was a turtle.. xDDD!! I was a fucked up child.

Hm.. what else? I got the Rent soundtrack and my gift from 'Stasia!! I was in a super bad mood until I started listening to it and then I was like "I'M GONNA GO MAKE A DOLL!!" it's turning out okay so far but ha ha... I think I know what I'm gonna gifts I'm gonna make for my g/f. Hopefully i don't become all lazy before next week and I can get it done. Yep.

And something crazy.. Last night I poured
salt onto my arm then stuck an ice cube on it. It melted into my skin and left it bone white for hours. o__o I don't recommend doing it, I have a higher pain tolerance than most, soooo... Ha ha.


Aaaaaand, an article that makes me laugh. When it shouldn't.

Murderer mimicks Jack the Ripper

And it kinda reminds me of Hannibal Lector too. Ha ha. Shows how much the world is fucked up.

xxx
Tori

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Thursday, December 6, 2007

december o6 2oo7
aka: nineteen more days until I get to watch fight club!

current mood:

Jesus fucking christ. (and a little sick.)

"- A man who allegedly assaulted a young girl inside a church was charged Monday with two counts each of statutory sodomy and child molestation, officials said.

Danny G. Wills inappropriately touched a 10-year-old girl at a church in Imperial, Mo., on Saturday, Jefferson County Sherrif "Glenn" Boyer said.

Wills, 47, of the 2000 block of School Drive in Pevely, was taken into police custody on Sunday after authorities received a call about the alleged abuse, Boyer said.

Wills was being held at the Jefferson County Jail in lieu of $100,000 cash bond.


KSDK."

I feel like I'm going to puke. A lot of you who don't read this will probably be like "you're just over reacting, it happens all the time." and some of you will be like "it's okay to feel sick! THAT'S DISGUSTING!" No, what's sick is... Danny Wills is my fucking cousin. What's sicker is that the ten year old he molested was my cousin, his niece! My mom always told me to stay away from him and shit because he got fucked up after the car accident (excuse my language, I'm really upset) and ugh. The one time he ever got close enough to do anything, he hugged me. And that hug was so creepy. It makes me feel disgusting. He dug his pelvis bone into mine and ugh ugh ugh..!!! And Ricky, the grandfather of my cousin, was like "If his parents get that bastard out of jail, all hell will break loose." Jeezus. I feel sick. And I think I might puke... ugh.. It ruined my mood. Considerably.

Nng... what else was I supposed to talk about...?

Oh yeah! MTV MADE is coming to MY SCHOOL. I repeat MTV MADE IS COMING TO MY SCHOOL! For try outs and auditions and hahahaha! I'm to young to go on there but when I heard about it, I totally was like "I want to be made into a fabulous gay man." xDD And, I was deciding what my friends wanted to be made into because we were amusing each other...
Brad: Super gay male underwear model
Bridgette and I(besides me being a fabulous gay man: Twin lesbians (so we can meet Sara and Tegan)
Tyler: Porn star (he, srsly, wants to be a preacher)
AC: Cheerleader

And there were countless others, but everyone decided JT should be made into a ladies man. And if you knew that kid, you.. xDDD Aaaah!! -ded- Ha ha.

D: I think I might explode soon if I don't make out... Does anyone ever get that feeling? Or maybe it's just because I'm half male... hm...

I'm sure there were other things I wanted to talk about but I forgot. xDD

xxx
Tori
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Wednesday, December 5, 2007

december o5 2oo7
aka: twenty more days until I get to watch FIGHT CLUB!!

current mood:

Yeeeaaaaah

Did you guys know that there's gonna be a live action Speed Racer movie? Please tell me you didn't, otherwise I'd feel very slow.;;;; And apparently I'm going to see the Sex and the City movie with my mom? Jiggawhaaaaa? ha ha;;;; -geek.-

So, any ways.... Christ-mas is coming. I'm kinda excited yet I'm kinda not. As I get older, the more the feeling of excitement I once had when I was a kid gets smaller and meh. I think my mom gets depressed around this time of year. Fucking holidays. Last year we didn't put up a Christ-mas tree and this year we're putting up a mini one. But I got to decorate it with the colors I wanted to decorate it with. 8DDD Because I'm better then you.

I kid.

I put up new arts if anyone cares. =DD

And, just out curiousity... is my comment link working? =/ With some people it doesn't show up but apparently it shows up on my computer. If it doesn't, PM me, and I'll try to fix that. Though, I dunno how with this layout..;;;; -might have to get a comment box.-

I want my twelve gauges. Now. NOW!!

Ha ha.

I have no idea what else to talk about. Except, I have this stalker kid, yanno? And he stalks me. I wouldn't be surprised if he popped up on this site!! He's on every other site I'm on and last year he used to get SOOOO pissed off whenever I talked about my ex boyfriend (he was my boyfriend at the time...).. And then, a few days ago, he slammed his chair into the desk all angry like because I wouldn't let him go through my notebook. And he looks like a stalker. I'm scared.;;;;

Any hoo...

xxx
Tori
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Tuesday, December 4, 2007

december o4 2oo7

current mood:

whoa

It's been a while since I've updated, huh? Two months to this very date. Ha ha. Sorry? I just really haven't felt the need to update. I have been on, though, checking journals and commenting and stuff. I doubt anyone is gonna look at this, actually. Ah, well. Who ever does, I thank you. And I promise to be on more often and start commenting on more journals. I get lazy now a days and if they're to long, I don't read. Ha ha;;;

Uhm, so.. I dunno what to talk about. My life has kinda changed a lot but then again, kinda hasn't. I broke up with my boyfriend, got a girlfriend.. Err, Birt. She used to be on here but quit, which saddens me but she has a dA so? And I see her at school and crap. D; We barely get to see each other out of school because we both think her parents know about us. xD;;; Her dad was like "WELL. TORI'S BI AND YOU SAY YOU'RE BI AND YOU TWO HAVE BEEN HANGING OUT LATELY AND IT LEADS ME TO BELIEVE-- -phone rings-" Yeah. Well. Who cares? Everyone needs love. :3

My belly button ring ripped out. Kinda? I woke up and it was gone. And the skin was ripped but I didn't feel it or anything. That happened a while back though. Oh! And I'm starting to gauge my ears. I started off from the normal piercing size, eighteen, and dropped to a fourteen last weekend. It didn't really hurt but it left my ears numb for a day and a half. Ha ha. I dunno how big I'mma get up to, yet, so.. -shrug.-

I stayed home from school today too. I woke up and was like "yeah.. I don't want to go to school.." so my mom told me to wash the dishes and mop the floor and I could stay home. xD She amuses me.

And... I dunno what else... a lot of people have been crushing on me lately. It's awkward.

And then there's the usual drama between my family and I. -shrugs.- All right, there's my update of my life. xDD Boring. I know.

me me me me

Uhm. I got the kanji translation off of babelfish, so I dunno if it's right. But it's supposed to say, "silly girl, you dream to big." or something like that. Fft. I was bored and it was three in the morning. Hence why I don't look so fab. xDD

emo me
Ha ha. Yeah. I like this one better..

xxx,
Tori
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Thursday, October 4, 2007

october 4, 2oo7


happy [and sore]

So, we all kinda chickened out on the rave thing. Once Syd said she couldn't shake the bad vibes, I admitted that I couldn't either. Positive vibes are better than negative. HI-HO.

Well, we're all gonna go hang at Syd's for a girls night, so. I guess that'll be f00n.

I'm LOVING me and Bridgette's art project. Are house looks so much like Zim's! (despite the windows on the side and in the back but Coach Coale is stupid and said we had to have THREE open windows. wtf?!). It's supposed to be a spooky horror house but uh.. it's not all that scary. xD

Enjoy some MUSIC. Just some current stuff I've been jamming to.

I made this music playlist at MyFlashFetish.com.

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