mood-worse than yesturday
song-<>wash it all away-evanescence
yesturdays post which never made it here...
on a good note, we have two new kittens =) they're called Rolls and Royce (mother's incredibly original naming idea...ok so my cousin came up with Fish and Chips...) but they are brothers and practicaly identical *laughs at me and emmah* they're grey with black stripes down the back and then kinda...spots down the side which arn't spots...they have spotty bellies though! and they are tres cute!! i lobe Rolls...he's the daring one that's come to me...Royce is shy bless him!! but Rolls scratches *covers wrist* i had the joy of diggin them out of my bed yesturday when i came home unsupectingly!! lmao and i have four nice scratches on my wrist from trying to pull him out.
so then in the evening, Rolls came and sat with me which i thought was quite sweet, Royce kinda of cowerded under the table between me and dad most hte time but eventualy went and explored the lounge...
and today i had Rolls trying to steal my prawn salad at lunch time...then when dad managed to lure him off to the kitcen with cat food, Royce came up behind me on the chair and biffed me repeatedly before skulking off to the kitchen! i mena what am i? their new biff-bag or something??
urm...so...onto relationships i guess...not sure quite what happened..ok it screwed up. i know that...it just didn't exactly work out because we had way too many differences...it was kinda hard to have a conversation where we agreed on something..and then...he split with me..though i didn't find out till TWO days later *feels like a fool* and then, someone's left a message on my answer phone saying `your brother's a fool, your all virgins and you have gay hair` and it was on wihtheld number so i think it might have been him as he awlays calls wiht a withheld number...i'm not sure. in which case, if it was him, i am going to beet the shit into him when i see him for insulting my familly.
oh yeah, and he said it was nothing to do with my hair we split up..right..well if it was him....why did he say that?
i don't care or anything, i'll do what i like with my hair and not give two shits if someone's against it so long as i keep my job!
i won't point the finger yet, cause i dunno who it was. but i can only think it's him.
hmm...and then there's alex....no standing relationship with him as that would make it sound. i thought i was compeltley over him...again...one whole day of no thoughts on him. none at all. even when i lay in bed daydreaming, it wasn't him i thought of...and then i had a dream about him again last night...looking ever so slightly different to how he did last time i saw him...like, slightly longer hair...but that was the only difference really...and it only lasted three seconds...but now i can only think of him. it is tres annoying when it happens...i'm never even gonna see the short bastard with a girlfreind again so why the hell can't i just fucking get over him?
urh...then there's the twin fandango...i fancied aaron, emmah fancied robin. that was fine...then we switched and i now fancy robin and she fancies aaron. that is also fine. but i come to the same problem here as with alex. i have no chance with them in high hell...but then even if i did..i'm so compeltely in love with alex would it be worth the risk?? i've already fucked up two relationships because of my feelings to him and they jsut WON'T GO AWAY. no matter how hard i try.
and i generaly feel even worse for fancying hte short bastard again today. grr. on a plus note, i don't hink i fancy robin. good.
grr now mum's telling me to come off.
WHTY DO I ONLY GET ONE LAME ASS HOUR WHICH IS NEVER ENOUGH GOD DAMNIT??! ok, i promcie i'll do comemtning next time i'm online *hugs everyone* i canae belvie this *cries* i never get anyrthing done, just aout get a post done and neve rhave time to comment peole. i feel so bad about it all the time and i cna't change any of it either unless dad goes to a meeting |
