Wednesday, June 7, 2006

Said it once and I know I will say it again,
You have a gift as bright as that sun,through a shine,
To stand in the shadows that you cast only offence,
Can't walk this explicit life like you were blind
Waited for You- John Butler Trio

So.... I wasnt to happy with the last theme I did and decided that seeing as I lack any creative urge at the moement I will instead change it to straight color... So now its purple and green... I found something I want to do a theme off... but I need to wait till I get back home and get my photoshop back... so... till I fix it... enjoy... I know its nothing near what I usually do...

Back on last Friday I was getting all pack to go down to C-town... as Im packing I get a message from Tiga asking if Im alive.... For a quick recap of the past two weeks.
Week 1: Otafest
Wasnt home... was away... being social... with other people..... so nah...

Week 2: Work/ sleep
Did exactly that... worked and slept.... went out with Stacie once... visitied Tiga that same day.... she was grumpy... and not friendly.... and we didnt stay long...

So anyway... back to the story... She sends a few nice messages... she won an Ipod from work (whoop dee do.... I pefer my Lyra), then starts asking what my plans are... Remember I was suppose to go camping but ditched that for Zanorich and computer access...

So it goes ((More or less... exact quotes in the little "" signs))
Tiga: what are you doing the tommorow
Sita: going to be in C-town
Tiga: When are you leaving
Sita: In about an hour (( as yes... I left packing that late))
Tiga: oh I see... have fun.
Sita: Will do.. you have fun camping
Tiga:"I guess"
Sita: Ok ((thinking the conversation is more or less dead))
Tiga: "Maybe when you get back you will visit for more than 2 min"
Sita: You seemed tired when we visited...
Tiga: " I was but you havent even called me. And I know you may say that I dont call you but you get mad when I do"
*read it as "but I do when Im mad"
Sita: But thats the only time you call :(
Tiga: "You never had anytime in the last 2 and a half weeks to call me. Hell I didnt even know you were going to c-town"
Sita((Thinking to myself: ummm... perhaps listening would be a nice habit to pick up as I know I've told you a few times I was going down to C-town.)) I've been busy with work and catching up on sleep this last week and was in c-town the week before busy with other things.
Tiga: lets just say you let me know your alive and leave it at that.
Sita: ok. Im alive.

Tried to start a somewhat normal conversation after that but didnt get to many more replies...

Pretty much been trying to stay out of contact with her and Dory since then as I dont want the aggravation of having to deal with it and defend myself when I want to spend time with other people besides them... Started getting somewhat annoying and bothersome messages from Dorian the other day that nearly pushed me to breaking right down....

To top off how the mood has been developing... I've felt depressed and easily aggravated all day long, getting more and more closed up as the hours go....

Long story short... Sita wants alone time.... She doesnt want to have to explain why shes so bitchy... she doesnt want to explain her mood... she just wants people to back a step or two up and let her be....

On a compelty different topic.... Yes I lack modivation,Heero... But my modivation tends to take 3 month vacations on me.... So I guess it will be back eventually...
Sita
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