Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I've got a big bag of crabs here...
Heh. I have a stupid song stuck in my head. Fun, no?

But I'm really sad. Lately I've been a bit pissed at everything, my life just isn't working out quite right and I can't figure out why. So i've been snapping at my friends...

I guess everything in my life just seems so hollow. I get good grades, but i don't try. I get complements on things I do, but I think they're mangled and ugly. I think there's something wrong with me... I can only see what's wrong with everything. And whenever I try, I can't get it. I did work hard on an english paper and i forgot it at home. And since I didn't have it, I got points taken off...

And it really feels like every time i try to do someting it turns out all wrong. Like this chainmail i was doing in art. I made it a bit too big, but everyone loves it and says I'm really great at doing things. And my english paper was rather repetitive sounding, but my mom said it was great.. Just everything doesn't work out in real life... But I get 100% for class participation when I'm sitting behind my bag reading Dante's Inferno the whole time.

*sighs* I just don't know what to do. Life's just become pointless. I'm living for what's going to happen in several years. Nobody ever seems to be doing anything and yet I can't call them when i feel like I need to.

Sorry. I just needed to vent that.
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Sunday, May 14, 2006

*screams and hugs everyone*
yay! computer!!! how i missed you, and everyone here.

My dad went on an anti-spyware crusade and took away my compy, but i got it back today, but the internet broke. So now the internet is back and i can visit everyone!

So... I can't even remember the last time i updated. Mr. Menin's 8 essays? They only had us do 2. I would have done all 8, but my dad was all, "No you can't use your computer. I'm going to be "fixing it" for 3 hours over the next week."

So. What happened recently? I wasted lots of saturday reading and playing videogames.

Friday I had my first crew meet. My boat won. I was the stroke which is the second most important person in the boat. (they set the pace, and are second to the coxwain, who is the one that tells people what to do.) And we won!!! By like 2 boatlengths. And it was at this fancy prep school, so i hadno issues with spitting in their lake after the race... everyone was telling me that they'd never seen me row like that before. And the coach told my mom i was small, but took into consideration that i was freakishly strong.

and er... that's about it. all that's happened. except watching someone sulk because they were in the sucky boat. but they have the "I have to win at everything physical" sort of demeanor. their intellectual hopes have been crushed by my practice of making their life a living hell.

Soo... yeah. I'm just going to leave now... and go around to the sites and stuff. Toodles!
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Wednesday, May 3, 2006

Yay! an ok-ish day!!!
Aside from one part of the day I had a fairly good day...

there were only 8 ninth-grade people here today! 'cause everyone else went to DC. SO what we did was have study almost all day. we had classes like art, math and spanish, and torture, like gym. and i don't have any homework.

the only really bad parts was our idiotfuckin'gonnadiefromastudentthrowingagrenadeathimnotthatiwould science teacher assigned us EIGHT ESSAYS!!! WTF?? EIGHT!!!!! OMGWTFBBQ!

I'm done now.

But that's ridiculous, it's not even a science fieldtrip. and it cost $600 dollars, and frankly Finland would be a better trip than somewhere on the SAME COAST WE LIVE ON. Ok, so there's a few memorials, that's like, it. I'm not social 'nuff to go and have it be worth it.

Then at lunch i had a little attack of fatalism and self hatred. That passed rather quickly.

And crew was good, except for the bit where i almost died of hypothermia... but we had the indecicive coxwain, not the mean one that doesn't understand people outside of the mainstream of whateverthehell pop idol those pagans in the middle school worship.

They're worse than The Esoteric Order of Dagon (guess who's been reading horror?)

Random Fact #21: On the eve of my second birthday I asked for a drivers liscence.

Oh, and an excuse to those of you at the end of the alphabet, I was going through sites yesterday, but then around 10 my wifi started being mean again, like it does when it's raining, so I couldn't get my connection back....
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Monday, May 1, 2006

I'm blogging this.
Ok, so last night I lived episode 3 of my chipmunk saga. A while ago I had a chipmunk in my room providing episodes 1 and 2. So I was sleeping on the couch last night and i woke up at 4 am and heard a thunk, like something very real and near dropping to the floor. And I look over the edge of the couch to see a little furry thing looking up at me. So I wake up my mum telling her that there's a mouse in the room, because that's what i thought it was. So my mum said it wouldn't jump up onto the couch, but right as she said that it did.

Then I just sat and watched for it, then my mum caught it in a tub. It's probably dead now because we put it into the ash can outside.

Crew today was teh suxx0rz. I was in the 8, not the four... so it was a different set of people. ALL of them were in the middleschool, except for 3 people from the four, which did include me.

So lessee... they had issues when we brought oars... because NOBODY told us what oars they wanted.... the cox kept complaining about me and Rita when everyone else was doing a FAR WORSE job.... oh and yeah.. ME AND RITA HAD TO ANSWER TO THE COX'S STUPIDITY. I was seat 4, she was 3, and the cox said seats 8-5 and the BOW PAIR. NOT SEATS 4 & 3. bitch. Oh, and one last thing, on friday I was rowing with the varsity and working on rowing techniques, which this boat was bad at, and when I was using the techniques the cox yelled at me. I would have told her to STFU but she was a bit far away.

Sorry if half that paragraph made no sense.

Hm... is there anything else? Oh yeah. Almost all of my grade is going to Washington on wednesday. I'm not. So I get 3 days of study.

And i got a black and white striped shirt the other day, along with The Necronomicon, Dante's Inferno, and Soul Music.

Random Fact #20: The worst thing I've heard was avril lavigne singing the spongebob themesong *shudders* stupid cousin.
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Wednesday, April 26, 2006

It's been over a week. A rather depressing over a week...
Ok, so I'll just go over what I remember... from spring break and stuff....

Easter: It's so hard to have a nice holiday meal when an adult is being overly mean and dictator-y for no real reason. My aunt was just yelling at my cousin, because she was tired or something. I don't get it, adults get to be all bitchy, but I never do...

Vacation: Vacation makes me emo. I was picking at my wrist with a thumbtack... just to do *something* otherwise I was playing Black & White 2 and Kingdom Hearts. But my younger cousins came up for a visit. The older one hardly remembered me from before... they're really cute. I got the older one interested in Gorillaz tho.

Skool sucks. Yeah. That would sum up... monday and tuesday. Nothing really happened except I'm sleeping on a couch. The *thing* in my wall is getting louder. The other day I heard it sneeze. And we haven't been able to get it to just leave. We can't poison it, because then I'd have a smells-like-dead-thing room.

Today I was in the Day of Silence. It's a protest about how gay, lesbian, bi, and transgender people are always discriminated against. I'm not any of these, but I hate it when people insist on enforcing their views on others. Well, not parents on their own children, but otherwise I take a STFU stand point. And then I was at a meeting thing for it after school...

my.space.key.is.pretty.much.busted.

And my mum is an EMT now. Great, no?

Random Fact #19: I have a part of my brain that is on auto pilot and it has a direct link to my mouth. That was what I found today... oh, and i like throwing rocks at people, but i knew that already... that's what i did at lunch instead of talking
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Sunday, April 16, 2006

h'lo.
Well, happy easter. Even if you don't celebrate, I'm wishing you a happy today. I don't really celebrate, but i can still have a vaguely happy easter, I think. I already slept through half of it, so it's a good start.

Um... what else? My foot has fallen asleep. I think i sat on it.

Yesterday I went to an easter egg hunt at my aunt's house (the aunt hill) there wasn't anyone really my age... there were 2 people over 10 that weren't parents, not including me.

I ended up playing with a cute little baby... and i don't have any idea what his name was or who's child he was... it was rather amusing..

I just remembered something rather funny... my mum and dad used to say i couldn't have caffeine until i was 15, and so i thought i'd have to wait until i was 15 to have any caffeine, and on my birthday i'd invite all of my many friends over and stay up all night from coke and coffee.

How delusional youth was...

Hm... and of course a random fact, because it is a fairly benevolent feeling noon...

Random Fact #18: I love babies, they're so cute and not bitingscratchinghittingkickingetc. It's kind of funny, I'm a bit, if not entirely psycho, but babies make me feel happier.

*edit* there's somthing in my wall. it makes me sad. I think I hurt my hand trying to scare it away.
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Saturday, April 15, 2006

Hi again!
Hm.. today, i went to a sushi buffet.. that was ok, my dad was doing what he always does.. pretends he know's exactly what's going on, but he has no idea...

then i went to the Aunt Hill, watched the first episode of Hunter X Hunter, decided i didn't like it, then put together a picnic table, played donkey, lost one game because of an itchy nose, and watched king kong.

Dear God that was a long movie.

Hmm, oh yeah, last night i had another dream... it was strange, because there was this very beautiful magical person, but they were trying to kill me, i was very evil looking, and so i stabbed them with this anti-magic statue, then i fell down and hit my head, when i started dreaming again, i was leading the legion of the spoons with my "dad" who actually is nothing like my dad. Then we were going up a mountain, and got captured by this guy who lead the other force, who had something to do with lightbulbs, and then i got loose in the night, and duct taped the guy's hands behind his back. Then I spit in his ear, because that's nasty and he couldn't do anything about it, and then i woke up because the phone was ringing.

Once again, I'm going to just skip a random fact, because i'm writing down that dream in deatail, and that is a task with a siren's call...

*edit* um.. if anyone knows a good way to make an animated icon, or would not mind making me one please pm/email me would work better.
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Thursday, April 13, 2006

Hi everbody!


yay... er.. sorry i haven't been around, here or to your sites. I have some excuses.
1. I managed to just catch a cold... so i've been sort of sick all week
2. I had crew.. and that sport is hardXcore.
3. I've been really depressed lately, I don't know why.

So... what's happened lately? I've been really angry at everything. And I just want to hurt things.

Um.. i have no skool tomorrow. or all next week.

I'm going to go eat sushi with my annoying OCD cousing tomorrow. But my *happy* aunt will be there.

Today I forgot my wallet in my other pants, so I didn't eat lunch.

I tried to break somebody's arm. They were being retarded and wouldn't note good advice on how not to have their dog die. Then they insulted me. I was trying to step on their neck... but they caught my foot....

I'm going to skip the random fact, because i already tried to crush the mouse in my hand once. I think i should go to sleep...
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Thursday, April 6, 2006

I'm wearing spandex pants!
Sorry, very inside joke there.. um.. hm. today sucks. i have to go to crew and a concert.

Sooo... yesterday i was really depressed, until i heard a really weird noise, and looked outside to see two squirells mating.

And um.. today i mixed pear izze with greentea. it didn't turn out quite as good.

the other night i had a dream i was hunting a pig. but it was an immortal pig. that could fly. and i was trying to kill it with a broom.

And what else... hm.. no idea.

Random Fact #17: Um... i can't stand people who admit to drinking diet soda thinking it's good. first: it's placebo soda, and second, diet means that they take out all the stuff that may be somewhat natural and put in more weird crap.
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Tuesday, April 4, 2006

hey...
Um.. i don't think i'll get around to everyone's sites, i have tons of homework, but i just felt like telling you all 2 things.

Firstly, at lunch i mixed purple izze soda with arizona green tea... it was good. we thought it would explode, or we would explode in an hour.

Secondly, crew practice was rather literally like hell frozen over. It was windy and that was hell, but it was freezing, then it started to snow. So i was sitting all by myself because I'm in the bow and i see snow, but i can't point it out to the person behind me, because there is no person behind me. I was on the only boat to get out... it was so damn cold...

Random fact #16: I assume I have a special-happy-differenty relationship with my mom if she starts singing helena, or we can have an intelligent discussion about old vs new green day...
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