Saturday, December 4, 2004

The Un-credibles [EDITED]

I could do without parents sometimes >.> When things get stressed, they get stressed. Of course, it's just another case of too many things happening at once, but it's still pretty frustrating when it occurs. I sometimes wish that Dad wasn't here. It's a horrible thing to say when I think about it, but the truth is that I can't help feeling like that. And I'm sure everyone has the same sorts of feelings every so often, about anyone. It's just... the way he says things is just so ridiculous. What's more ridiculous is that he doesn't realise the impact he has at all. He gets so defensive and then denies it ever happened at all. And really, he's on a completely different wavelength to everyone else in the family most of the time so conversation doesn't exactly come easy. he chooses bad moments to time things, gets in the way, doesn't share our tastes in music... I could go on for a very long time, but it wouldn't be fair to. The problem is... if we had a steady stream of money coming in from elsewhere, I know that he wouldn't need to be here any more. And what scares me most is that it's almost a comforting thought. I don't want to think like that- nobody does. But situations create conflict. Ah, but it wouldn't be a full week without an evening of unnecessarry parental stress. Go and see Methuselah She needs your hugs. Pet Shop Boys: The Survivors Cross a windy bridge one winter night Past Embankment Gardens enter warmth and light Face the music (It's never easy) Forget the chill Face the future (It's never easy) Find the will If life is worth living, it's got to be done One might be forgiven for thinking it's a life on the run Many roads will cross through many lives But somehow you survive Look around, picture what's in store Is this the final edit, or is the subject now a bore Don't shrug your shoulders (It's always easy) You can't ignore That life is worth living, it's still worth a damn One might be forgiven for thinking it's something of a sham Many words may make it sound contrived But somehow we're alive The survivors - Our heads bowed The survivors - At memorials for other faces in the crowd Teachers and artists (It's never easy) And Saturday girls In suits or sequins (It's never easy) Or twinsets-and-pearls If life is worth living, It's got to be run As a means of giving, Not as a race to be won Many roads will run through many lives But somehow we'll arrive Many roads will run through many lives But somewhere we'll survive

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Re-Enter the Net

The first part of the new chapter is up and running ^________^ It's been a long time, and thanks to everyone who's nagged me about doing it. Hopefully this'll be the start of getting the rest of it done and dusted. There won't be many more chapters, but there's still a heck of a lot I can put in them, hehe. Enjoy ^___^

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Friday, December 3, 2004

It's Oh So Quiet...

Bjork, hmm. I'm so tired, heh. I got less than four hours' sleep last night for no real reason and today was a long day at rehearsals, and I was doing something pretty much all the time. I don't mind rehearsals like that too much- at least I'm getting further towards developing a character, rather than just sitting down and festering in a corner. The singing lesson went extremely well, heh. I sang many songs and was in tune for most of them ^_~ Oh, What a Beautiful Morning was especially good. I was surprised actually, as I didn't think I was actually going to be awake enough to do anything. but a decent cup of coffee (sorry Kei) and a very cold walk perked me up. Mentally. I had a really weird dream that wrist cutter wrote a MyO post berating me about how little I've been commenting on people's sites recently, heh. And it is something that's been bothering me- I've seen things I've wanted to comment on or something and I've just... not. Or I've missed the site entirely. I'm just tired, I'll get over it. But with all these rehearsals the last thing I want to do is neglect everyone here. Hoping to go and see The Incredibles on Sunday. That'd be coolies. Might add more later, if I can think what I want to write. Otherwise I think I'll just get to bed, heh. Sorry ^_^; EDIT: Karmi: I was wondering if someone would pick up on that, heh ^_~ EDIT 2: I've not had a writing spell like that in ages o_o; But anyway: There will soon be an all-new, 17-page chapter of OtakuBoards: Enter the Net. It's not the one I'd advertised as appearing next, but it's almost here nonetheless. Just sit tight until it goes up ^_~

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Thursday, December 2, 2004

A Quickie ^_~

Well, I need to update this, heh. It'll be short, as I've not left myself much time of late. First, I want to thank everyone who's posted in Anime Stereotype High School. I love you all ^_^ Secondly, I bought a new hat. It's gorgeous, and I took a picture of it. but I won't put it up yet, heh. Thirdly, I finished my Pass Plus course today- and yes, I did pass. I'm on my way to becoming a much better driver. I'm a little sad that I won't get to see my instructor again on such a formal level, partly because he's cool and partly because I've just broken another barrier of 'adulthood' that I never wanted to reach. It's not that I didn't want to drive (and heck, I do now and even if I didn't there's not much I can do about it), it's just... I used to have quite the Peter Pan complex, hmm ^_^; Fourthly... I can't remember what this one was >.> Fiftly, everyone should visit Shy, because he is amazing. For that matter, you could visit anyone on my Friends List, but since Shy actually updated today he gets a special mention :p And Nerdsy, one of the unsung legends of OB. Oh, I remember what the 'Fourthly' thing was! I got a Conditional offer back from the Drama School, heh. I'm very pleased, even though it probably only means that I'll be accepted on the basis of my grades and/or my skills in the workshop, which is what I expected anyway. It's still nice to have it on paper. That's about it for major developments, I think. Save for my stomach slowly decreasing even further in a rather fluctuating way. It's gettin' smaller ^_^ *hugs to Mimmi* See you soon.

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Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Late and Great... sort of.

Well, today's a late update- I hope it doesn't get too far overlooked by everyone, heh. Today's been a long and very tiring day, but bits and pieces of it were very necessarry. I bought travel insurance. Whoop-de-doo. Now I can go banana-boating and be financially covered for it >.> And oh, remember my two friends who said ther were getting married? Well, it turns out that they're actually not getting married. In any degree. It was all a big joke. Ha bloody ha. I'm quite upset about that, actually. What kind of joke is that to play? I was really, sincerely happy for them and I started telling people they knew, too. Yet nobody said it was a joke. Ah, maybe I took it all too seriously, but even so it seems a stupid joke to play. I'm tempted to tell them I was upset by it, but then... what good would it do, except gain me an apology? I'd only be doing it to satisfy myself, really. The question is whether that's really deserved or not. Anyway, the rest of the day was filled with rehearsals and... parent's evening. Showdown... Usually, Parent's Evening means I go and hide somewhere while the teachers tell mum what I've been up to in classes. Generally it's good anyway, but tonight... ...it wasn't bad at all. Both my tutors really like me, but if I want to be successful then I really need to do some serious work. And unfortunately that probably means *deep sigh* not going to Anime Expo this year. The Shakespeare module means a heck of a lot in theatre, and they want me to play a big, 'meaty' part with lots of swordfighting, and failing that aspect of the course may affect my future in the Stage Combat course at East 15. I was really underestimating its importance. I'm sorry I've been advocating AX all this time when I don't actually have the opportunity to get there now. Well, I might be able to make the last day or so depending on the performance dates of Shakespeare, but it'll be busy. I don't mind busy as such, but I know now I won't be able to make all of it. That's the major news, I suppose. It's a huge disappointment to me personally, and I know it is to some other people too. Sorry. I counted my chickens too soon, it seems. I still want to get out there and meet all of you that I can. If the summer holidays are free, you can bet I'll at least be going somewhere, even if it's not where I was originally intending to be. Sleep well, guys. I might, if I tire myself out through exercise enough...

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Saturday, November 27, 2004

Grins and Grimaces

Thanks for all your advice, guys ^_^ It really means a lot to me. Pyro, I shall definitely phone you sometime ^_^ I talked things over with Mum and we're okay now- we've established what it is that's causing the stress. As much as it is college giving me long, lethargic days and relatively boring nights, it also makes me neglect to eat properly- she noticed I've been lacking my usual appetite for food and haven't been eating as much fruit lately. So I promised her I'd start increasing my fruit and meat intake, heh. And I also owe it to all of you to start doing the same. You've been great to me, but it doesn't mean anything if I'm not good to myself on the same level. So it's all getting better. I refuse to let stress get the better of me, and hopefully tomorrow I'll get a good section of my writing assignments done. they aren't exactly hard, just... more than I'm used to. Admittedly last year I pretty much just bummed around or went out after college- having longer days and actually having to *shock* do work is a bit of a culture shock. But shocked my culture will not be any longer! And poor my grammar is be being! Dirge... accompanied closely by Thrust and Ramjet It appears that Anime Stereotype High School is dead. It's a great shame, really- we weren't even past the first school day ^_^; I blame myself mostly for not ironing out the confusing problems sooner and for putting it up at a time where most of the participants suddenly had a lot more commitments- college, University, jobs and the like. I'm glad it was met with such a great reception, though. Ever since Shy's first conception it's something I've been wanting to re-do, and I don't think I could have asked for more, heh. Ideally I want to at least get Way of the Worlds finished. I could just write up one huge post, but Kei in particular said she wanted to develop Gatomon's character more. And I'm happy with that, heh ^_^ In the meantime, time to start working on the revival of Outlaw Star: Future Prospects and Nazreal, which I may turn into a series of chapter-based RPGs. More details on that when I know how I'm actually going to do it ^_^; To Finish: What I would look like as an anime guy and/or girl, apparently. What Does Your Inner Anime Character Look Like? (For Guys) by Rose Lover User Name Age Height Fav. Colors Fav. Anime Show What you look like Role The one all the girls fall for Quiz created with MemeGen! What Does Your Inner Anime Character Look Like? (For Girls) by Rose Lover User Name Age Height Fav. Colors Fav. Anime Show What you look like Role Villain's girlfriend Quiz created with MemeGen! *hugs everyone* Love you guys ^_^

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Friday, November 26, 2004

Outside Looking In

Before I start this, I want to give a special shout-out to people who've been signing my Guestbook, heh. I'll try and get back to you when I can, but things are busy. Summoner_Rekka: Thanks for the compliments, heh ^_^ Mysterious Cities of Gold is/was an anime made in the 1980s by a French animation company, based loosely on Scott O'Dell's The King's Fifth (although frankly, I prefer MCOG much better). I love it. Mum said I've been less approachable these last few weeks. I didn't know she felt like that. She told me what she thought it was, but I explained to her that if anything it was college- last year's days weren't nearly this long and I never had so much to do. Whenever I get home all I really want to do is relax, so when she reminds me to do something I suppose perhaps I do snap a bit. I haven't meant to, and at times I know that I've been rather unreceptive to ideas and reminders, but I had no idea it was su... pronounced. I guess mothers notice these things more. I know college is taking a lot out of me, but really I'm just not used to having to cope with so much, not since A-Levels. Maybe even GCSEs. I don't want to go back to that. I don't like knowing I'm makig other people feel uncomfortable around me. But I haven't really changed that much... have I?

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Thursday, November 25, 2004

Me, in the world of handwriting.

Well, seeing as many other people had tried this test I thought I'd have a go too, heh. I decided when I started that I'd be honest and not hold what it said in too much seriousness. Here we go... For a graphologist, the spacing on the page reflects the writer's attitude toward their own world and relationship to things in his or her own space. If the inputted data was correct Hugo has no white space or margins on a typical sheet of paper. Hugo fills up every last inch on the top, right, left, and bottom. Hmmm. If this is true, then Hugo has a very aggressive personality toward others and quite frankly lacks a bit of respect for the space and property of other people. I would be surprised if Hugo just comes into someone's home and helps himself to a drink in the refrigerator. This can be both an obnoxious personality trait and it can be assertive and effective in getting what you want. There isn't much fear of getting in trouble here, Hugo finds plenty of reasons to break the rules and get in trouble. (Okay, perhaps when he was younger, not anymore?) Basically, people with no margins are a handful. Well, I can safely say that that is not true in any way. If anything, it's the oppisite. I'm incredibly careful with other people's things and would never encroach upon them without asking. So that's that down the pan. Hugo has a very unusual lower zone y loop. If the data input is correct, Hugo's y or g is large and has triangle shape to the lower loop. This is not a common trait, but the implications are very interesting. As you begin to study handwriting analysis, you will learn any loop indicates imagination. This lower loop indicates the amount of imagination Hugo has regarding sex and physical things. His lower zone stroke is large, so his sexual imagination is large and open. Furthermore, because the loop has a triangle shape, this indicates a particular curiosity with certain aspects of sexuality. In a nutshell, Hugo is open to some very new ideas sexually and is willing to try anything once. I'd say Hugo is quite a dynamic and playful lover. Watch out world! -^__^-;; Hugo is sarcastic. This is a defense mechanism designed to protect his ego when he feels hurt. He pokes people harder than he gets poked. These sarcastic remarks can be very funny. They can also be harsh, bitter, and caustic at the same time. Eeh, I suppose so. I just don't get hurt very often. I can be pretty sarcastic at times, but it's rare. Hugo is a practical person whose goals are planned, practical, and down to earth. This is typical of people with normal healthy self-esteem. He needs to visualize the end of a project before he starts. he finds joy in anticipation and planning. Notice that I said he plans everything he is going to do, that doesn't necessarily mean things go as planned. Hugo basically feels good about himself. He has a positive self-esteem which contributes to his success. He feels he has the ability to achieve anything he sets his mind to. However, he sets his goals using practicality-- not too "out of reach". He has enough self-confidence to leave a bad situation, yet, he will not take great risks, as they relate to his goals. A good esteem is one key to a happy life. Although there is room for improvement in the confidence catagery, his self-perception is better than average. Hmm, I don't know about 'planning'... I tend to cobble things together in a more haphazard fashion. But self-esteem's okay. In reference to Hugo's mental abilities, he has a very investigating and creating mind. He investigates projects rapidly because he is curious about many things. He gets involved in many projects that seem good at the beginning, but he soon must slow down and look at all the angles. He probably gets too many things going at once. When Hugo slows down, then he becomes more creative than before. Since it takes time to be creative, he must slow down to do it. He then decides what projects he has time to finish. Thus he finishes at a slower pace than when he started the project. He has the best of two kinds of minds. One is the quick investigating mind. The other is the creative mind. His mind thinks quick and rapidly in the investigative mode. He can learn quicker, investigate more, and think faster. Hugo can then switch into his low gear. When he is in the slower mode, he can be creative, remember longer and stack facts in a logical manner. He is more logical this way and can climb mental mountains with a much better grip. That's interesting. Hugo is not facing something going on in his life today. He is deceiving himself about it. Often, Hugo's opinion of himself is different than those around him. This trait gives Hugo the ability to deny anything that does not agree with his "truth." This trait is not always something negative. It is only a defense mechanism allowing Hugo not to face some reality in his life at this time. I don't really think this is true. Perhaps I chose the wrong option. Hugo is sensitive to criticism about his ideas and philosophies. He will sometimes worry what people will think if he tells them what he believes in. This doesn't mean he won't talk, or that he feels ashamed. It merely means he is sensitive to what others think, regarding his beliefs. Yeah, sort of. Although generally I don't have too much to worry about. Hugo is moderately outgoing. His emotions are stirred by sympathy and heart rendering stories. In fact, he can be kind, friendly, affectionate and considerate of others. He has the ability to put himself into the other person's shoes. Hugo will be somewhat moody, with highs and lows. Sometimes he will be happy, the next day he might be sad. He has the unique ability to get along equally well with what psychology calls introverts and extroverts. This is because he is in between. Psychology calls Hugo an ambivert. He understands the needs of both types. Although they get along, he will not tolerate anyone that is too "far out." He doesn't sway too far one way or the other. When convincing him to buy a product or an idea, a heart rendering story could mean a great deal to him. He puts himself in the same situation as the person in the story, yet he will not buy anything that seems overly impractical or illogical. Hugo is an expressive person. He outwardly shows his emotions. He may even show traces of tears when hearing a sad story. Hugo is a "middle-of-the-roader," politically as well as logically. He weighs both sides of an issue, sits on the fence, and then will decide when he finally has to. He basically doesn't relate to any far out ideas and usually won't go to the extreme on any issue. Yes and yes. People that write their letters in an average height and average size are moderate in their ability to interact socially. According to the data input, Hugo doesn't write too large or too small, indicating a balanced ability to be social and interact with others. I'd agree with that ^_~ According to the inputted data, Hugo has a stinger shape inside the oval of his a, d, or c. This might be hard to visualize, but if this little hooklike shape is present, then Hugo has an unresolved "issue" with strong members of the opposite gender. An occasional appearance of this stroke could indicate a simple "loves a mental challenge" which can manifest in playful linguistic conversations and being attracted to a lover who isn't always available. However, if the stroke is severe, this means the individual has unresolved anger at the oppostive gender - which usually started with the person's childhood relationship with the opposite gender parent (Mom or Dad). If the writer is a woman she will be attracted to strong challenging men. If the writer is a man, he will find the woman who is "hard to get" the most attractive. In a nutshell, people with stingers in their writing tend to have challenges in their romantic relationships. For more information about this "stinger" trait, visit this webpage: http://www.myhandwriting.com/analyze/hlltrt5.html. Remember, it is only negative if the traits occurs often and is quite pronounced. An occasional stinger can be no problem. Hmm, perhaps. But I can't think of any 'issues' as such. Well, that was interesting. I'm partly inclined to do it again, but I don't think my handwriting style will change much, heh. Some of the options I found quite hard to understand at times, so I picked the one that I thought suited best, but honestly I didn't know that well. Ah, it doesn't matter too much. Just one of those things, really.

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