myOtaku.com: Solo Tremaine

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1985-07-23
Gender
• Male
Location
• Chichester, England
Member Since
• 2003-08-04
Occupation
• Ex-OtakuBoards Team Miyazaki Leader, Actor, Writer, Director, Stage Combatant...
Real Name
• N/A

Personal

Achievements
• Becoming a Moderator on OtakuBoards, starting up my own production company with my best friend Dan.
Anime Fan Since
• I liked the Mysterious Cities of Gold before I did Pokemon, but Pokemon was the first Japanese Anime I really liked.
Favorite Anime
• Digimon, Wolf's Rain, Mysterious Cities of Gold, Outlaw Star, RahXephon, Zoids, Princess Mononoke, Trigun, Howl's Moving Castle, Bleach, Naruto, Fullmetal Alchemist, One Piece, Fruits Basket
Goals
• To write my series of stories, and to act in cool stuff.
Hobbies
• Writing, acting, anime, GameCube, Wii, swordfighting
Talents
• Stage combat, writing, acting, being vaguely humourous, and listening.

myOtaku.com: Solo Tremaine

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Frustrations Abound

Last night's sleep was a disturbed and depressing one. I'm beginning not to like dreams anymore.

The first was a frightening nightmare about this person dragging everyone I knew into a pitch-dark wooden basement in the middle of the night, whereupon they died. I don't want to go into any more detail than that.

The second I think was one whch affected me more, strangely. Because I know that most nightmares are just figments of my imagination and don't bear any relation to reality.

It was set in this house, although this house was actually a spaceship on a voyage to somewhere with the Red Dwarf crew. Well, Lister anyway. He was the only one of the original crew there, we were all other members.

Anyway, if anyone knows my fanfic, you'll know there's a female Digimon character in it called Tempestmon. I won't dig out a link to the picture now. But anyway, this dream is about to get weird.

We found Tempestmon somewhere and I started teaching her to speak properly (as in the fanfic, she couldn't say anything to begin with [and yes, I know it doesn't need to be in spoilers but I want to do it anyway]). The problem was, she fell in love with Lister.

And this is the strangest bit about it- I wanted her to love me. I remember me watching the two of them talking over the other side of my bedroom on a storage crate, and I hated them for it. Real, intense jealousy.

I woke up soon after that, thank god. But I felt terrible when I did. Not because I'm not in love with Tempestmon of course (simply because I am not. To love a fictional character is bizarre, to love one of my own is narcissistically so. Anyway, I have someone else for that, heh), but simply because they're not real. And they will never be. You can think this as pathetic as you like, but I've always wanted Digimon to be something more viable than hand-drawn images on a screen or a plastic figure. I guess it's just a childhood dream I've carried with me long past when I should have grown out of it, but I can't help it any more.

Even daydreaming is starting to annoy me now, and I want to finish my fanfics before becoming totally disillusioned.

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