Monday, October 31, 2005

Dilemma Morals

Comments! Shy: Then you shall have them ^_^ Kei: Yeah, that sounds good. It's not as if I have any urge to be out by next week or anything, heh ^_^; I keep thinking that there are so many things I want to do that aren't actually possible until I move out. They're more subtleties in behaviour than anything specific, but I really don't want to be relying on anyone but myself any more. I love being there for other people, and it's nice to know that I'll always have my home here if I ever need it, but I want to grow as a person. I want to be able to feel properly independent rather than always having something hanging over me. And although it's not a bad thing to still have that influence in a way, I can still carry it with me, but shift it from being what I feel is a slight emotional burden to something that'll actually help me. sahkiryce: Being bums wouldn't be too bad, but I wouldn't want to be constantly on everyone else's property ^_^; I'd always be worried about people coming over and turfing me out, hehe. Moving out's always a daunting prospect to have to face, and much easier if there's someone with you. The main reason I've been feeling more motivated to do anything is because Dan suggested we could move in together, which would be fantastic. I think. Alan: *giggles* Pyro: ^_^; I couldn't see! I can't see myself becoming particularly stuck unless I came across something financial or technical I can't cope with. I can do cooking if I'm following a recipe; there may be a few things I'm not so good with and a few things I can learn which'd make things easier, but nothing's impossible. heh, a week-long stint in Sheffield sounds pretty good, but I don't know if I can really afford to lose any more time off working. I'm already pretty far out of contact with them... Gasara: Well... it's entirely your decision. I probably wouldn't have wanted to move out unless I was actively motivated to think about doing it, and the more I do, the more I see things about me and my life that would change as a result. I always worry about what'd happen to a lot of my stuff, though- a huge toy collection isn't exactly essential, and I've no idea what kind of place we'd be living in. but that's a hurdle you can cross when you get to it. If you're happy living at home, then that's entirely your decision ^_^ You shouldn't leave home just for the sake of it- to just tear yourself away from something that's convenient and comfortable doesn't make sense unless something comes along that changes where you want to be and what you do. So it's not as if it's essential. It just depends on who you are and what turns up. And anywhere I do move to should be closer to you by some degree, hehe ^_~ But I wouldn't want to dump all my repairs and things on you. That'd be rude. Sami: Yeah ^_^; It's making sure you have the faith in the first place that's the problem. I just need to sort out a few final things, then I should be set. Jeremy doesn't know anything about my plans yet... Googlism for the day: "solo is an ideal training tool for individuals looking to improve their fitness" What do you do when two people ask you out on the same evening? I'd planned to do stuff with Dan all through today, but he's been out and has said he can only do something in the evening, which I wasn't expecting at all. And I'd already sort of made plans with Jeremy... ...but I think I'm coming down with a cold or something. I'd rather stay somewhere nearer to home (Dan's only about two miles away, whereas Jeremy's about 17) in case things go bleh. What's the time, Mr Wolf? I got myself a new sword on Saturday ^___^ It's five foot six inches long ^________^ And very light, which is even better. The only downside is that I hadn't anticipated who I'd be fighting with- Derren. Paul kept giggling to himself on the way back, saying over and over again that the uber-fencer will be 'very pleased to have someone to play with'. I wish I had more armour... Jeremy went to the London Expo on Sunday and picked up L'Arc-en-Ciel's SMILE for me. It's not as great as I was hoping it to be (not compared to AWAKE, anyway), but at least I actually have a *cough*non-downloaded*cough* copy of Hitomi no Jyunin. It's lovely ^_^ Tiredness? Stress? Frustration? For whatever reason, I've been feeling incredibly hungry these last few days. And erm... very sexually frustrated. I can't explain it. Perhaps it's the weird weather or something astrological (Mars was very close to Earth a few days ago), but it's unsettling. And annoying, because we haven't got anything that I feel like eating in the house >.>; I finished off half a muffin, had some bacon, a bowl of cereal, two slices of toast with stuff on top and some smoothie juice, but I still feel there's more I could guzzle. And I have a sore throat that I want to get rid of. It always happens when I make a particular strange noise with my throat that the day after i develop something rotten. I hope it's just a temporary thing... I'm sure there was eomthing else I wanted to talk about, but it's gone. Ah well ^_^; *hugs everyone* Take care.

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