Tuesday, January 3, 2006

Tissue Fish

Stray! Stray! In the cold breeze that I walk along The memories of generations burn within me Been forever since I cried the pain and sorrow I live and die, proud of my people gaining I'm here standing at the edge Starin up at where the moon should be Stray! No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose Ever stray! So I'm gonna live my life as I choose Until I fall.. Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! In the white freeze, I never spoke of tears Or opened up to anyone including myself I would like to find a way to open to you Been a while, don't know if I remember how to I'm here waiting on the edge Would I be alright showing myself to you? It's always been so hard to do.. Stray! No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose Ever stray! So I'm gonna live my life as I choose Until I fall... Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Is there a place left there for me Somewhere that I belong Or will I always live this way... ? Always stray No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose Ever stray! So I'm gonna live my life as I choose Cause all things fall Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray! Stray... I have a packet of tissues called 'sniff', and they're blue with goldfish on them. They actually look more like funky children's party napkins, but indeed they are for nostril excavation rather than mouth cleaning. Although I'm sure either could be suited to both jobs equally. I hope everyone's had a good Christmas and New Year (so far, heh). Unfortunately I can't view comments and I haven't been to people's sites in a while... today's been one of the first days I've had some spare time to do this. Anyway, Christmas itself was good. I'll get onto that in a minute, though. Just before Christmas was not good, however. In fact, I can safely say that I haven't been more upset and angry in a very long time, and I'm still seething a little. Basically, I had to pick up a DVD player for some friends I've been helping out for some time, and bearing in mind from my house to theirs is a 44-mile round trip I'm seriously going out of my way to bring it to them (as I have been since I met them, pretty much...). That evening I got a phonecall saying it was the wrong one, and I was accused of having been to a different shop to fob them off with something sub-standard. I said no, and that I'd send the receipt to them through the post. I was told in no uncertain terms that that wasn't good enough, and that I should drop it off to them. Reluctantly I agreed, and put the phone down. Not more than five minutes later I got a second phonecall saying 'sorry about that, but...' and then they proceeded to tell me that I was next to useless, completely undedicated and accused of thinking that one of my (then) closest friends I saw as some kind of charity that I did to make myself feel like I was a good person. Oh, and I also ruined their Christmas. I was livid. I've never felt more betrayed or abused, and even though it's hard for me to hold a grudge, this is one I intend to retain because it's basically affected my entire future. I'm at a point where my life can branhc off into one of two different routes; doing business with them was one of them, and going into acting/stage work is another. Both would allow me to write my stories, but more and more I'm realising that this branch isn't one I want to pursue for as long as I first thought. I'll do what I can for them to get it started, then I want to go, unless they can do some serious convincing. But I don't trust them any more, which is a great shame. Anyway, despite travelling all the way to them on Christmas Eve to drop off this bloody receipt, I still had angry thoughts of them hanging over me all throughout Christmas and the days afterwards. After speaking to many many people all of them said they were surprised I hadn't felt this way sooner; looking back at my relationship with them I've been taken advantage of so many times, but because of who I am I never saw it that way and just put myself out for them needlessly. Still, over the next few days I intend to have a very frank chat with them about it, and hope that'll be the end of it. Tales of Azumangia Forgetting everything else, Christmas itself was the best I can remember. Even though Mum had told all of us not to spend too much money on everyone, we'd all gone and bought presents for each other, and it was a great feeling giving them out and seeing the family's reactions ^_____^ I gave: -Corpse Bride and soundtracks to Mum -A Have I Got News For You DVD to Dad -Star Wars Republic Commando and a Star Wars calendar to Dan -A comedy DVD to Lawrence -An Uchiha Sasuke figure/Full Metal panic mangas/Pocky to Jeremy -Exotic cooking sauces to my older sister -A Tito (Fox-squirrel from Nausicaa) plushie to my younger sister I was given: -The Azumanga Daioh Thinpak collection -New Scientist's Does Anything Eat Wasps? book -A big lot of money ^_^ -More of the World's Stupidest Signs -Quake 4 for PC -Project Eden, also for PC -Four brain-bending wooden puzzles -A Naruto wooly hat with Konoha forehead protector ^_____^ -A massive tin of the best chocolate chip cookies I've ever eaten -A really sweet e-card ^_^ -READY STEADY GO single -TALES OF SYMPHONIA!!! So I'm completely gifted out. I also have one more yet to send, but... I'm still looking for another half of it, because the thing by itself doesn't seem enough. And I want it to mean something. I spent most of the day playing on Tales of Symphonia, and OH MY GOD I love it to pieces ^____^ It's completely engrossing, and I can barely beliave how much there is to do on it. My current playing position is 23 hours or so, and I've not even left the first disc yet. I've watched two episodes of Azumanga so far, and I think it's something I'll probably end up watching more when my mind's turned off; it's not quite what I was expecting, but still cool all the same. It's just... pleasant watching, really. And sometimes that's all you need ^_^ The days after Christmas were pretty cool. I was relaxing more, and I went to see Narnia again because the Fox is the best character in the world. Having my sister down from Bristol was really cool too- it's always good to see her again. She's had to sort out her bedroom so's Dan can live in it for the next couple of weeks. He's moving in on Saturday. New Year's Eve was interesting. I'd already said I was going to spend it with the people I subsequently had that altercation with on the 24th, and when they phoned up they seemed almost extra-nice about things. It wasn't intended as a night of arguments, though, so I went (rather reluctantly) with every intention of leaving if things went sour. Thankfully, we all had a really good time in the end. I think for that evening we just completely forgot about any obligations and confrontations and just played the World of Warcraft board game. So things are relatively pleasant, for the time being... At the moment I'm sorting out the house to make it ready for Dan's arrival. I'm looking forward to it; although he won't be here all that much as he's got work to do and I'll be shooting off every so often, it'll just be nice to have him here for however long he needs to stay. It should also be a fair indication as to whether we'd be able to share a flat/house in future, heh. Toodles, everyone ^_~ Take care.

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