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Monday, December 28, 2009



Date: Monday 1:21PM December 28th 2009

The last time I posted here was around October right before school started. Well that's probably the entire reason I haven't been posting. School drowned me. Art school for anyone that doesn't know. I do like it but I dont know..
No one has the intense passion for art that I do. The teachers are horrible. The students who strive to do their best, the teachers dont even think about but the ones who do their work 5 minutes before class or are too lazy to do things- the LOVE them. WTH!?
I'm overly stressing out now and needed somewhere to write it out..
i spent christmas alone which was wonderful. I didn't get anything which was wonderful. and the reason i say that is because this. My college tuition is about $7,000 a quarter. My father ranted and raved constantly before i went to school that he had tons of money and was literally giving it away. the guy is an alcoholic and is the worst rotten piece of shit i've ever met. it's infuriating. he buys random crap he doesn't need. if he had $5 is his pocket he would act like it's $50.
I try to never ask him for anything because i knew school would be a huge amount of money and he promised to pay it when i was in 5th grade but suddenly this year he believed he didn't need to work that he could lie in bed and sit in a bar all day long doing nothing and make a ton of money. That's in no way shape or form true for anyone of any case unless you've inherited a fortune.
So no longer does my father have any income which means he cannot pay my tuition as promised. When i dont ask for things like christmas and birthday presents and dont take his offers to go out to eat or something it's because i expect him to put that money towards college but i'm so stupid because all it really goes towards is his tab at a bar and cocaine. and yes he does do cocaine because i've caught him.
so at first he decided to sell some of the random crap he's bought just because he's wanted it like a motorcycle when he already has 3 cars to himself. So for the first tuition payment he sold the motorcycle for $10,000 so he had $3000 left over which when straight towardssssss ...drinking obviously.
The second payment was due December 2nd and.. It's the 28th and he still hasn't paid it. he didn't even start worrying about it till the 4th. He's been trying to sell a stupid supercharged mustang he bought from a friend. I hate this car with passion. why the hell he bought it i have NO IDEA because only his girlfriends drive it and he has like 10 while being married at the same time. Because no one is buying anything right now he can't sell it and is making me put all of this crap on craigs list for him. I do not see why it's my job to sell his junk.
Because the car isn't selling he wants me to put his other car which is a cadalac XLR (like he needed that to begin with) online and try to sell it too. He's also been talking about selling this house (which he doesn't need either). It's a four bedroom house, it's huge and i'm the only one that lives here full time so why does he need it? IDK =_=
anyway on sunday he brought up to me that WE need to get a student loan and that I need to talk to my mother about it. so i said "why do i need to talk to her?" she's not going to cosign a loan because she's already stuck with 2 that my dumbass stepsister defaulted on. So he goes "ok well then i'll cosign and i'll pay what i can on it during your school"
1) he has shitty credit
2) i dont have a job
3) "i'll pay what i can while you're in school" means that I have to pay the loan after I get out of school by myself.
4) "i'll pay what i can while you're in school" means he is not obligated to pay for shit. at all. and i know him. he'd rather buy random crap with that money then put a cent of it towards me.

he starts talking about how he was talking to his wife's niece yesterday and how she was saying there were people in her office who make ten times more than she does doing graphic design. which means he's hinting at me supporting him later in life. I dont think so. it makes me furious thinking about having to know him for another 5 years forget anything else.

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