Thursday, December 7, 2006

   Cream Filling & Nougat: Half-Julkalender (Chapter I)
[I'm hoping that explanation video is finally starting to work for people, 'cause I'm really sad that so many of you couldn't see it (YouTube uploading newbness). In any case, let's get this thing rolling already . . . it's been over a year . . .]


"What the heck took ya so long, it's cold out there!" Cream said with a furrowed brow and wide smile once 'Mel finally opened the door; she could only laugh back in response.
"Get your ass through the door, then, and shut up," she answered back. Cream came in and wrapped a firm hug around the smaller woman.
"Hello 'Mel."
"Hello Whip'." Cream soon felt a hand on the back collar of his trench coat tugging him further into the apartment. Getting the hint, he loosened his arms around 'Mel and moved further in.
"Kids these days," Nougat commented, "don't know how to share anymore . . ." With that, he hugged 'Mel and spun her around in a quick circle as she laughed lightly. "Merry Christmas, 'Mel."
"Right back at ya, Noug'."

"So I brought you a cake and a bottle of wine," Nougat said as he walked towards Cream who was already in the large apartment's kitchen.
"We brought you a cake and a bottle of wine," Cream asserted, "though I did select the wine specifically for--"
"Yes, yes, you have an amazing ability to play Eeny-Meeny--"
"Hey, old man, let me finish my sen--"
"...Miney-Moe."
"Jackass."
"And how." As the two sparred verbally yet again, 'Mel could only smirk and shake her head.

"So," Cream said, "I can't help but notice how empty it is here. I thought you were throwing a party?"
"What, you can't smell the freakin' turkey or something?" 'Mel replied.
"Oh no, the turkey I notice . . . and it smells lovely, by the way . . . it's the rest of the party . . . would you not agree with me, old man?" Nougat nodded from his position against the bar connected to the kitchen.
"I concur indeed, Whip' . . ." 'Mel groaned playfully; she knew what was about to happen.
"Cop mode already . . ." she muttered. "Alright, let's hear it . . ."

Nougat put down the cake he was carrying next to the bottle of wine that Cream had already placed on the bar.
"I think I'll allow my young colleague here to start things off . . . Detective Filling, if you would please . . ."
"I thank you, Detective Nougat," Cream said before clearing his throat audibly and falsely. "So first off, it is very true that you currently have a domesticated avian creature slowly roasting in the oven, as well as a large pot of boiled - soon to be flattened to a pasty consistency, I shall presume going by the cattle-brand shaped device next to the afore-mentioned pot . . ." 'Mel broke her silence.
"Skip ahead, please!" she pleaded, "you know big words, we get it!" Nougat chuckled quickly.
"Burn," he commented before Cream gave him a stern but amused glare. "Oh, do continue, Detective Colleague . . ."

Cream shook the distractions out of his head and went back to his observations.
"Anyway, as we have thusly explained, our gracious host has cooked enough food for . . . I'd say, about three dozen people. I also know for a fact that although this is a honkin' big apartment considering rates for places in the city, it would take quite an effort to comfortably fit that many people into this apartment . . . . . technically, the comfort of too many guests is besides the point, but still, the point that a great amount of food as been prepared, presumably for a great amount of people who are presently not here . . ."
"Uh huh . . ." 'Mel said, nodding slowly.
"Next," Cream continued, "I distinctly remember one particular phone call to our office, asking us if we were free to help you go and buy decorations for this alleged party . . . now, the two of us were working very hard that day and thus were unable to acquiesce to your request . . . can you confirm this, Detective Nougat?"
"I most certainly can, Detective Filling," Nougat answered.
"Thank you . . ." Cream responded before turning back to 'Mel, "but nevertheless, you told us you had gone anyhow on the own incredible strength of your own body. Of course, as all of us can plainly see, there is no hint of the aforementioned decorations anywhere in this apartment, is there not?" 'Mel smirked once again.

"Oh, there most certainly is, good detective sir!" she said, clasping her hands together and bouncing on her toes slightly. "If you would be so kind as to step out of my kitchen and into the living room, I'm sure you will find the boxes and bags under the coffee table completely accomodating to your inquiries . . ." Sure enough, as the two detectives peered over the large couch, they could see assorted packages under the glass of the coffee table surface. "And if you two would again please be so kind, we only have about forty-five minutes to an hour before the other guests really begin to arrive . . ."

With that final bit, the detectives' tiny mystery was solved.
"Oh hell no . . ." Nougat groaned.
"I thought five-thirty felt a little early," Cream stated.
"Oh please?" 'Mel said, raising her clasped hands under her chin and continuing to bounce. "I got caught cooking all afternoon and didn't have time to pretty up the place . . . and really, what would you guys have been doing during this time if I hadn't called you earlier?" Cream and Nougat looked at each other for a moment - then they shrugged.
"I wasn't gonna do anything," Nougat said plainly, "you?"
"I'unno, watch stupid internet videos to kill time?" Cream added. 'Mel stopped bouncing, but still stood up tall.
"Alright then, I bet you two'll be able to get through all of 'em in half an hour, easy!"


Nougat spent the next good while assembling a small, pre-lit artificial Christmas tree while Cream methodically strung garland and LED lights across fireplace mantles and cabinets. And, despite essentially drafting her two friends to work for her, 'Mel still could not believe how quickly or effectively the two of them could decorate her home in festive decor. She, meanwhile, was frantically flipping through the brand new cookbook on her counter trying to find all the tips she could about keeping her turkey from coming out right; her timer was about to count down and she still wasn't sure if it was completely cooked or not. Of course, both detectives already noticed that hidden concern, but chose not to say anything about their friend's efforts to prepare her meal.

The phone rang, causing 'Mel to curse uncharacteristically loud and forcing Cream and Nougat to stifle their snickers. 'Mel rushed across the kitchen, pressed a button on the phone and shoved it between her ear and shoulder.
"Hello?" she said into the receiver as she made her way back to her stove and cookbook. "Oh, Sellie! Hey, what's going on?"

Feeling that the moment's entertainment was done, Cream and Nougat went back to decorating the living room and dining area; the feeling was all too brief.
"What?!" 'Mel let out, startling the other two who quickly perked back up. 'Mel made hand gestures for one of them to come into the kitchen to watch the food as she left the kitchen and rounded a corner to somewhere quieter. Nougat motioned for Cream to head to the kitchen as he slowly crept his way closer to where 'Mel was speaking. Cream agreed, but continued to keep an ear out for whatever was clearly wrong on the phone. As Nougat slid past a hall closet, he started to hear more of 'Mel's side of the conversation . . .

". . . when did you lose track of her?" "Have you called any of her friends yet?" "No, I understand . . . do you need anyth-- . . . Sellie, hold on . . ."

Sensing that 'Mel was coming back, Nougat dove over the top of the couch and back into the middle of the living room.
"Hey guys," 'Mel said, lines of clear grief visible across her face, "I need your help right now . . ."

Cream quickly lowered the heat on all the stove elements and came over to where 'Mel and Nougat were already standing.
"My friend Selleri can't find her daughter," she said, "they were supposed to come over, but-"
" . . . you need us to make some calls, so to speak?" Cream asked. The corners of 'Mel's mouth tightened.
"I know you guys have had to wait so long to finally get this vacation time, and-"
". . . now we're gonna go help one more person before it's really vacation time," Nougat interrupted. 'Mel pouted subtly but not seriously.
"Can you guys please stop cutting . . . oh forget it . . ." Nougat gave her a reassuring bump in the shoulder.
"What's Selleri's address?"


'Mel led the two men back to her door after they retrieved their coats from the other room.
"Do you want me to come with you guys?" she asked.
"Sorry," Cream answered with another reassuring smile, "unofficial police business, you gotta stay here."
"Besides," Nougat added, "you gotta stay here in case those guests arrive, right?" Again, 'Mel could only smile in response.
"Sellie sounded happy to hear that you two are coming," she said as the men were halfway through the door, stopping and turning them around. "You two come with high recommendation, y'know?"

"We'll try not to sully the worth of your word," Cream said. Nougat nodded in agreement.
"Keep some slices of that bird waitin' for us," he finished as they walked down the hallway to the elevators, "we'll be back as soon as we can . . ."

"Thanks . . ." 'Mel added as the door closed, ". . yet again . . . . ."


[And now I officially don't know what happens next. Fair enough for all of us, eh?]
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