Thursday, January 5, 2006

   OMGYAY. And don't freak, mmmkay?
DUDES....you know me and my FREAKEH pyschic powers, si? Well, OMG, I'm getting such weird vibes about tomorrow...really good ones though too. So, i have NO EFFIN' CLUE as to what it means, but YEAH.

Oh, and I'll be getting a 80% or so on my book project, 'cause I'll be turning it in late. No, i don't give a fuck. Really, I don't. As odd as it seems, I really dislike school with a passion for some subjects. I mean, I can love the teachers, even the class, but....man, I swear I have undiagnosed ADHD or ADD or something. I'm really bad when it comes to focusing in half my classes. Oh well. =3

I need to text mine and Chelsea's lover here in a bit. Needing to wish him good luck for Saturday and tomorrow. 'Cause of him being in All-State Choir and all, and that they have rehersals today and tomorrow, and perform on Saturday. If only I could butter up the 'rents into taking us to go see him! I wanna go hear him sing! (Yush, he has a gorgeous voice; he's a baritone/bass, with raw talent. Much like me and my alto. =D But yush, I need to make sure one of us cares, and to tell him his role for the play from tomorrow!

Yeah. But GUH, earlier tonight, GAH, *rawrsnarlrawr*.

If there's one thing I truely HATE AND DESPISE in this world, it's people who claim to want "to kill themselves" without any true reasoning behind it. NO, I'm not talking about people who have some kind of mental disorder, or those who live REALLY bad lives, and despite what they do, they still are treated/feel like they're worthless. What I hate are these little "emo" kids who do it because it's "cool", or these other stupid teens who hit a rough patch in life, and instead of working to overcome it, just freak out and go all "WOE IS ME" on people.

And yes, I have my right to complaine about that: I've been dealing with depression and thoughts of suicide since I was twelve. Four years of mental toture that, most of the time, i didn't understand. I'm A LOT better today than I was a few years ago, and even though I still have my moments, I see that I have people to support me and who truly love me, and who I could never risk hurting by doing something to myself that I may regret one day. As it's been put to me: It takes a greater will, strength, and courage to live with the pain and suffering, than it takes to end it all.

*sigh* All of this comes from some stupid little Freshman at school, who's brother is "friends" (I use the term lightly, as I can't stand the little beast, and my brother is sick of him as well; the only good kid in that family is the oldest boy, who's a lil' sweetheart). She's been getting people after her at school, and was telling my mom that it was "almost so bad that i thought of killing myself". That shit just made my blood boil. I'm not comepletely sure WHY, but I think it's because I really know what it's like to have to face every day with the though of "Should I do it today?", weighing to pros and cons for MONTHS at a time, and finally reaching a conclusion; and this little FOOL has only herself to blame for people wanting to shove her around and mess her up ANYWAY.

*rawrsnarlrawrspitrawr* Sorry guys, I know, fuckin' teen angst. xDDDDDDDDDDD But i just needed to vent! *squeals and huggles everyone* Muah dollies, I do love you all!

So much love-

Megumi
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