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myOtaku.com: StolenCrusade


Monday, December 3, 2007

Separation

glitter-graphics.com Many people find that quitting a habit "cold turkey" is the hardest thing to do. In all my expiriences, I can say that I agree with that fact.

There are many things that people try to get away from: smoking, lying, cursing and sometimes the one they truly desire. Now its been a monthsince I have ceased to communicate with my turned crush turned enemy. I would have thought that he'd be out of my mind...Guess Again! Old habits die hard...and for someone like me, who gives people advice on thier relationships, separation is the hardest pill to swallow.

This person may not be nice in personality or looks...yet just being in his presence turns me breathless. With most "gay relationships" attraction is mostly physical. Yet I feel like there could be something emotional in this. Yet, if we are enemies, why did I fall so hard in love for him?

Now we can't even say "Good Morning" to each other. And everyday that we come into each others gaze without saying anything, is just cruel. It's like we have so much we want to say even though we don't have the balls to say anything. The worst part is that I cause my own pain, he has already let go, but I don't give up on anything that my heart wants. At this point, I could do anything to even talk to him. Maybe the holiday spirit can help him give me another chance.

Bottom line is that I had to rant about stuff that has been harboring in me for a month...i think I'm a pathetic person...(sniff)

*StolenCrusade Out*
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