Saturday, November 12, 2005

Satan! What Is He Good For? Absolutly Nothin!
There's this guy at school who is REALY annoying. You know how parents say "Oh, just ignore him and he'll leave you alone." It doesn't work! If you do that, they just keep pressing all of your buttons, until they figure out, 'Oh... This doesn't work. Lets press every single bloody button at once!" That usually works you know? That's the way Satan works too. Your heart is your room in an apartment building, and if you ignore every time he presses the buzzer, he'll eventually say 'Oh... This doesn't work. Lets press every single bloody button at once!' "Testing, testing, one two three! Is (Insert name here) there? I'm here to take him to damnation!" Now, put a 12ft electric, barbwire fence around your door. So that if Sata tries to get in, he'll get zapped! And for even more protection, hook as many car batteries as you can find onto the doorknob on your side of the door. If Sata somehow gets to your door through the 12ft, electric, barbwire fence, he will get seriously electrified. He'll be like, "Oh... what a pretty electrifying doorknob...." And then fall over. Now, you have two doors in your room, the one that Satan will come through, and the one that Jesus will come through. Do me a favor, DON'T OPEN THE DOOR SATA WILL COME THROUGH! Don't even look at it... except when you are hooking the car batteries up to it. Open the door for Jesus to come through, and he will super charge your batteries, so that he has no way to short-circuit them! Back to damnation. If you don't electrify the door,
Satan: "Knock knock."
Person: "Who's there?"
Satan: It's me, Satan, come to take you to damnation!"
Person: "Oh... Well... I heard that was a bad place..."
Satan: "No. It's awesome. You get to do drugs, drink excessive alcohol, have sex before marriage! And all that other fun ****."
That's what Satan will do... You all like donuts right? I love 'em. Well, Satan will take a jelly-filled donut and take out all that yummy strawberry jelly and fill the doughnut with a poison called 'Damnation.' He then glazes the doughnut with all this good-looking stuff. ie. Sex, drugs, alcohol. All that sortta stuff and give it to you saying, "Here, take a bite of this! It's good!" As soon as you tae a bite of it, you get addicted, and you eat more and more of his poisoned doughnuts until you die! Mentally, spiritually and eventually physically die.... So do me another favor..... Don't eat from the enemie’s hands.

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