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AIM
• faeriechic5

Vitals

Birthday
• 1988-03-30
Gender
• Female
Location
• Huntsville, Alabama
Member Since
• 2005-09-02
Occupation
• broke student/starving artist
Real Name
• Ellen

Personal

Achievements
• XO of my JROTC, I'm Senior Class Artist, and i have 8 sibs and i'm still here
Anime Fan Since
• forever
Favorite Anime
• Inuyasha, 12 Kingdoms, FMP, FMA, Slayers, Cowboy Bebop, Gundam Wing
Goals
• small business owner
Hobbies
• art, anime, manga, books, my friends, cooking/baking, JROTC, and uhh...yea
Talents
• drawing, and reading really fast




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myOtaku.com: SunNshadow


Thursday, September 15, 2005

  I feel like i almost get my world together,only to have it fall apart again. My friend is sick, and i have the feeling that she's candy coating everything she tells me so i won't worry. and that just makes me worry more. One of my other friends is going thru some stuff,and feel helpless. Like i can only watch while she slowly dies a little every day. She's one of my best friends. we're talkin, 10 years and one of the VERY few who has never betrayed me. She's going thru so much and i can only sit by and watch. She can't get away from it. it follows her home and to school. I'm gonna try and help, but what can i do? i can't give her a different family. I can't give her friends at her new school so she's not lonely. I'm gonna try to be w/ her as much as i can, to help her forget for a while i guess. its the only thing i can think of to do. I feel helpless, and I hate that. I hate the way i feel every day. i hate going to school with only one real friend, and having no classes w/ her. I hate being that girl who never talks, who no one knows. I'm the Senior Class Artist. but no one knows who i am. you'd think that they would at least vaugely kno me. but they don't. because they don't care. I am depressed i guess you would call it. Is that when you feel like part of you is gone,and all that is there is this heavy lump of numbness there? almost like a weight that makes it hard to breathe? its almost tangible. I don't feel like me ne more. only when i'm w/ my old friends, or at home do i feel like ME. Now all i'm doing is making it worse. I wish that i could just make it go away. I want my friends. I want them to be ok too.
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