Saturday, June 24, 2006

Baby Daddy Phenomenon
Its been 8 years 11 months and 2 weeks since my daughter was born. And in those 8 years 11 months and 2 weeks I have received maybe about $200-500 from her daddy (this is not from his family, its just the money from him) and he doesn't involve himself in her life the way that she wants.

He is not involved with me besides being friends and his relationship with her is ziltch. Don't know why but can this possibly be attributed to the fact that the parents do not hit them with responsibilty from the day that they have the kids. Sometimes they do but then and again they don't get the picture. My Baby Daddy happens to be one of them, one of the ones that didn't get the picture and here I am today 8 years 11 months and 1 week later, wondering if I could have pushed him to become a better man. I for one was stupid enough to think that he would finally come around and become the father she needed and the man that I wanted him to be.

I think many of us handicap men more so unintentionaly when it comes to kids and I've noticed that in the case of my baby's daddy. For these last 8 years 11 months and 2 weeks he has not paid a definite amount of child support every month. He has not seen her on a regular basis but when he does want her around he feels that we should drop everything we do to accomodate him. I just don't get what he wants when he does nothing to earn it. He does not stay around to gain her love and trust and even sometimes she even is withdrawn from me. Its just crazy to think about how we are supposed to do that for a man. I refuse and finally I think I got things together in my head to make him fight for his child. Or at least I hope that he will. But who knows how he'll react. But its just the kick in the butt he needs. Hopefully next year he'll be on child support or in jail for not paying child support. It's time to step up to the plate....

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Wednesday, March 16, 2005

The weirdest thing....
Heyy all. Guess thta was long enough of a pause to leave you here without any company but now. Im here to say...

The weirdest thing happened to me yesterday. I was home and I have this guy friend who's ben making hints at me and I him about getting together. So we would chat about it but never made any plans.

Out of the blue yesterday we were like sure lets get together and just chill. I was cool with that cus I knew he ha work and stuff so I was ready for nothing, but hoping of course.

When he comes down we start chatting and laughing. OMG is he fine. 6' even. Low cut hair. My complexion.. Kinda like a toasty caramel color. Not to dark but not too red. You know. And he was smelling soooooo good.

*Made me wanna faint.*

But in the process of all the laughs and giggles things get serious and we start making out big time. It continues but before we complete the process he starts thinking about his girlfriend

*News to me...didn't know he was serious about anyone.. Knew he was dating but no one serious*

So we are half naked.. Im turned on and he isn't anymore as he starts to talk about his gf and how he messed up and so on.

So I listened to the sob story and we resumed to just chill. Came to understand he and his girl had been serious for a few months but he messed around on her and when it came to me.. He thought of how wrong he was for what he had been doing.

This guy is in love big time but doesn't want to commit fully to the relationship he was in.

Slowl as an hour passes by..my desires wear off and begin to be replaced by understanding (still confused about somethings though) and compassion.

I began to really see where he was coming from and I had been in the same situation myself.


I think what it comes down to I'm asking have you ever had a situation where something happens but then the person has a change or heart half way through,?(whether it be making out or just a kiss, whatever your situation tell me I don't want to feel alone!)
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Saturday, December 25, 2004

Happy Holidays!
Well well well. Another year, another Christmas, Hannukah and Kwansa started and enjoyed this year.

Although I just enjoy the Christmas holiday I would love the chance to know about others Holiday ways.

I don't know many in my area who celebrate Hannukah but I have always wanted to at least experience once. See it first hand myself. Same with Kwansa.

One day I think that will happen. Hehe if anyone wishes to volunteer and bring me into their homes to allow me to celebrate let me know....

I WILL JOIN YOU!
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Wednesday, December 15, 2004

   Introduction!
*Boohoo*
*boohoo*

Nobody on OB made a comment to my story. *sniffs* I guess I better not even waste my time on posting it there if no one likes it. *IDEA*

I got it... I can let you read it.....

The title has been long thought of and I couldn't think of anything better so I may as well go with my gut....

Here it is....
Golden Mystic.

The full moons light never made it through that night, the night they needed it the most. The two of them sat together in the tree, they dared not lay a foot on the ground, for they were everywhere, scouring the forests for weary and ignorant travelers. Their breathing became shallow as the creatures moved amongst the trees, but the two did not let their stance falter.

A loud rumble was heard a few feet below them, followed by a single yellow eye, then a pair, looking around in the dark, its large mouth opening for a second as it roared out into the darkness and began to keep moving. The large body covered in an impenetrable armor scratched at trees. Its massive body knocking the smaller of them over as it stomped along. The ‘swoosh’ of its tail was ever apparent and gave a bit of relief to the wet heat that surrounded the two travelers as they sat in the trees as the creature moved along.

Everything was deafly still, even the demons stopped their movements when it came around. They ranged in all sizes and shapes. Some looking like a small snake, others ranging to the size of humans with hideous faces. Some at times were smart enough to cover their faces, lurking near the edge of forests crying and complaining of being lost. Taki remembered that experience well. She and a group of inexperienced, so-called, demon hunters had been on the road to the Mieru province when along the steep highly forested road they found what they thought to be a woman crying. Taki luckily stayed back as a man went forward to see if the lady was okay. Taki heard it. The demon’s breathing, a quick series of soft clicks that had been heard various times throughout the night, as Taki and Sato sat in the trees.

She remembered running to him trying to get him away but it was too late. The demon whips around quick, her thin frayed hands grabbing the man’s throat crushing his vocal cords immediately. The others in the group had also moved in but the demon seeing no reason to fight fled from the hunters leaving the man’s dead body on the ground. They looked over his body no one wanting to touch it. The demon had its kill waiting for her and the hunters could not carry him. The group went on Taki the last to follow for she wouldn’t leave the man there to be desecrated. She covered his body in a fine powder and chanted rapidly to herself. The words came out in a quick succession and then she stopped. She placed one open hand over the man’s body and he began to burn. Taki turned on the body and heard the demon growl from about twenty feet away. It was unable to attack the girl, and very angered, seeing his dinner and another potential meal go to waste.

She smiled in the tree as her companion sat only a few feet away from her and saw a gleam in her bright green eyes. He remained quiet but studied her eyes as she closed them and seemingly drifted off into a relaxed sleep.

In the distance another roar was heard, a reply to the first. I hate this time of year, the young man thought, shifting a little on the uncomfortable branch. Mating season, he leaned back and relaxed against the tree. He looked to the sky hoping the moon would peak through the clouds, giving him some sollice, an answer to whether dawn would soon break. He felt the smaller demons move around him. They’re breathing moving in every direction as they ignored both him and his companion.

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Tuesday, December 7, 2004

Another Day! Nothing new though!
You know. I was gonna start this post off complaining about the boring life I live(shoot I did it still).

Never mind that option I think I'll try to talk about something more creative now.. Hmmmm *thinks*

Okay I know, I think I'll post a tidbit on my RPG I made up for Otakuboards. Since as of now no one seems really interested I think I'll make it into a short story or something. Bring it here in segments for all of your personal enjoyment. Like you'll read it here too. But who knows you all may surprise me and really like it. So just be on the look out for that.

Also just to get a list of what I've been through the last few months I'll give you a brief synopsis!

1. Grandfather almost died. Twice. Car accident and almost died of suffication due to complications of that car accident and a surgery he had less than three weeks before that car accident.

2. Two count it two hurricanes hit the East Coast of Florida where I live. Luckily as u can see I survived.. Or did I reall? *Ghost wails*

3. Grandparents moved in with my mother and I, kicking me out of my room. OOOOOO! Not my entertainment center.. I need it in my new room... *looks around* S**t no where to put it.

4. Car breaks down.. had to pay $400. Im still paying my mother back for that.

5. Car messes up again.. More simple stuff but still paying $200 for that. Now owes mom $300 more dollars.. *raises eyebrow* Now is that.. Well have only paid 300 of the original $400 so far. So lets calculate that $400+$200=$600-$300=$300 <-- amount left to pay.. Hehe aren't you happy I know math.

6. Met a guy, had relations and now I don't talk to him. Moral of this story... One night stands are sooo not worth it.*Eyes cute guy as he walks in room* But then again.. :D.

7. Thinking of Criminal Justice to be my major.. No longer want to be a Nurse.. Hehe imagine what I'll be able to do with a gun in my hand.. HAHA! *evil smirk*

8. Th-th-That's all folks!


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