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myOtaku.com: The Vampire Ed
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Tuesday, February 3, 2004
The Jackson family outrage continues!
It started off with the many charges against Michael Jackson for being a pedophile, a sexual deviant. As if that wasn't bad enough sister of MJ, Janet Jackson, along with accomplish, Justin Timberlake, pull a stunt where Janet's right breast was exposed for all to see during the Super Bowl half-time show.
Whoops, boob-o-rama for the football fans thanks to Mr. Timberlake.
Now, as if these two incidents weren't bad enough, it has now been confirmed that Michael Jackson will be establishing his own "soft drink" company called Jacko Drinks Inc. The problem isn't that he's establishing a "soft drink" company, but his main beverage campaign will be geared towards children. The "soda's" name? You guessed it, Jesus Juice. It was said that Jackson had offered wine to children to loosen them up, which he referred to as Jesus Juice.
Jacko's way of reaching out and touching the children.
"Michael told me, after I awoke later with a tingly privet region, that it was the spirit of Jesus telling me he loved me." One boy told police after finding an incriminating video of Jackson with said boy.
When questioned about his motives Jackson replied "It's love. We gotta love the children. What's wrong with that? Jesus Juice is the spirit of Jesus, and he allows children to have wonderful dreams while making them feel good too, and that gives me pleasure as well. What's wrong with that? What wrong with sharing a little Jesus Juice with a ten year old boy in your own bed? I mean really, where's the love?"
Many people were confused by his babbling, but it was quite evident that he was pleased with his actions.
Jesus Juice is set to hit store shelves February 10th, and the price will be $4.99 for a 6-Pack of Jesus Juice. But with recent events the government might step in and put a stop to the sale of this product.
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