Monday, December 8, 2003

"I Hate My Friends."
Hello and hi. OH! I've good news and bad news! Which would you like to hear first? The good news? Okay. No quiz results right now! Whoo! And the bad news... In place of quiz results, I have.... a rant. A long and boring one... Uh... But just for you it will be filled with betrayal! Intrigue! Anime! Manga! Typos! See? Doesn't that sound nice? No? Who asked you anyway?! Right. This is just the prerant. I know. I can't believe it either. Anyhoo, here we go.

You know those people who you begin to think are just mirror images of yourself? Like, you dye your hair blue and they dye theirs blue? Or you buy a fancy handbag and they buy the same bag? Or you raise your right hand and they raise their left? ...Okay, maybe not the last one to that extent, but you get what I mean.

Well then, you know those people who do anything to be just like you. Do you know that car commercial where the guy's in his car and he takes a sip of his drink and everyone holding drinks does the same thing? And then he drops something and everyone holding something drops it. And he coughs, everyone coughs. Yeah. Like that.

Well, it seems that I'm one of those people who people try and follow.
Person A: I like anime!
Tog: Gee, that's funny. Me too. Haven't you noticed that by my collection and inability to go 2 minutes without referencing something relating to anime?
Person A: Uh... no... You like anime too? Hee hee hee hee, how funny!
Tog: So... um.. what anime do you like?
Person A: ....uh... you know...
Tog: Nu-uh. Tell me.
PA: What's that one you're always talking about?
Tog: ...Trigun?
PA: Yeah! I like that one!


And so it goes.... but of course, because my friends are teenaged girls, it goes something more like:
"We're into anime too now! Isn't that funny? Just few months after you show how much you like it, we like it too! Ha ha ha ha! Isn't that funny?! Oh yeah, and since we have more money than you'll ever have, we get to buy a lot of stuff and give it to each other! Ha ha ha ha! But you don't get anything. Oh, and since we can buy anything we want, we know more than you."

Otakusennen: Direct quotes are fun!

And then of course, there is the merchandise.
-Person A has a Chii plushie-
Tog: Oh! Neat! Chii-chan!
Person A: What? Oh this? Yeah, Person B bought it for me.
Tog: Oh? Are you two Chobits fans? (In head: Please tell me at least one of you is!)
Person A: Cho-what?

And this, is exactly why I want to kill my friends. But my story is not finished! For it seems that I have left out a vital kog in my reason towards hatred of my closest friends. There is some types left out. I like to call them flip-flops... but then again, I like to eat instant ramen for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. (Great, now I'm all hungry and stuff...)

Do you know the types I mean?
Person C: Gawd, Tog! You're such an idiot prick for liking anime. Die, you geek.
-Person C comes back from vacation-
Person C: I love manga! It's so wonderful! I've been reading it so long! Hey! It's Tog! Uh.. I don't want to talk to you. I'd rather read my manga.

But then...
Tog: Eeewww! Shoujo... painful...ness... owwiee... (Ooh! Yaoi! I'll be right back!)
Person C: Yeah, I know. It's dumb and girly, but I can't stop reading it. (What's yaoi?)
-Person C gets more into that series-
Tog: You still reading that dumb shoujo stuff?
Person C: It's not dumb! You're dumb! Die, butt****!!
Tog: Um... okay... I'll be over there... Watching pretty boys kiss...

And for the last type, the type that I'm pretty sure you've encountered before. The I-Hate-You-And-Everything-You-Stand-For type of friend.

Tog: Okay! It's my birthday so we're all gonna watch my favorite anime until we puke! Doesn't that sound fun everyone? Oh, and if you don't want to watch it you can sit outside and do other things.
Person D: I hate ALL anime. So, even though it's your brithday, I'm going to talk really loud through your favorite things so that no one will be able to hear it. And then, when we can't watch anime anymore because I'm a total bitch (((Tog's note: That's right! I didn't bleep it!))), I'm going to eat five slices of the pizza you ordered while complaining about it and not leaving you any! Oh, and yeah, I know that it's almost entirely my fault that you shoved your hand through a glass door causing you to get a huge disfiguring scar and lots of bloodloss. ...And I didn't get you a present.


Again, direct quotes ARE fun. And so is the sad, sad tale of Chickenfoot... I mean, Tog. And the longest rant in MyOtaku.com history! ^_^

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