Tuesday, October 19, 2004

I'm so cool lol.

	So yeah. This last week was the best and I went to Halloween Horror Nights on saturday night which wasn't so good, but still fun. Anyway, the major reason for this post... In december I not only get to see Wanda Sykes preform live, I also get to see Marilyn Manson live... OMG!!!!!!!!! It's going to be so great :) YAY ME! Thats all. Song of the Moment: Mad ? Why the hell was I mad?.... ohhh TV... that makes perfect sense now.

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Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Survey crap

	I am also bored so I decided to do this survey thing in wrsitcutter's journal... I figure I would have a little more Xs then he would... Might be interesting. () I have been drunk (x) I have kissed a member of the opposite sex (x) I have kissed a member of the same sex () I crashed a friend's car () I have been to Japan () I rode in a taxi (x) I have been in love (x) I've had sex (What do you consider public?) I've had sex in public () I've shoplifted () I have been fired () I have cut myself on purpose () I have been in a fist fight (/) I've had a 3-some (x) I've snuck out of my parent's house (x) I have been tied up (x) I have been caught masturbating () I have been arrested (x) I've made out with a stranger (x) I've stolen something from my job () I've celebrated New Year's in Time Square (x) I've gone on a blind date (x) I've had a crush on a teacher () I've celebrated Mardi-Gras in New Orleans () I have been to Europe (x) I've skipped school (I wish) I've slept with a co-worker () I have thrown up in a bar () I have purposely set myself on fire () I have eaten sushi () I have been snowboarding () I have been snow skiing (x) I have made a snow angel (x) I have been happy with myself () I have met a movie star (/) I had sex in a pool () I went to a prom () I've bungee jumped () I have been to a pop concert () I have dated someone for over a year () I sold naked pictures of myself (x) I have been in a car accident (x) I have slept in the nude (x) I've eaten cheesecake () I've had jury duty (x) I've hated someone without knowing them () I have been to Maine () I've shot a real gun (x) I've ran around with my trousers around my ankles (x) I've had sex with someone within a week of meeting them () I've done ecstasy () I've gotten my ass kicked () I've been caught smoking () I've milked a cow () I've got in a verbal fight with a teacher () I've cheated on someone () Lied one time in this survey () Lied more then once in this survey () Threw a party at a friends house when they were gone () Partied every weekend for the last month () Sniffed markers to get high (x) Slept for more than 15 hours at a time () Petted a live tiger (x) Kissed someone in the snow (x) Found a four leaf clover (x) Gave your parents the finger behind a closed door () Gotten drunk in Germany (x) Cried in public () Cried in public in the last 5 days () Been hit on by a member of the same sex (x) Been asked to perform oral sex by a complete stranger (How do you mark this if you were unknowingly?) Have unknowingly been the other man/woman in a relationship () Have knowingly been the other man/woman in a relationship () Hates the SuicideGirls.com banner Cory added more to make this interesting! (x) Bitched at someone (x) Been bitched at (x) Saved a friend from a bad situation (x) Went to a baseball game (x) Went to a football game (x) Went to a basketball game (x) Spent the weekend at a friend's (x) Sucked my thumb () Purposefully failed a grade (x) Got picked on in school (x) Dressed like the popular kids () Joined the military (x) Been to the beach () Had a TY Beanie collection (x) Had a blonde moment (x) Love your mom (x) Love your dad () Gotten along with a step-parent () Gotten a piercing (x) Told a friend you didn't like their boyfriend/girlfriend (x) Confronted your parents (duh) And lived to see the next day () Liked Barnie - () Liked Teletubbies - (x) Bought a friend a gift () And still haven't sent it yet (x) Is innocent (x) Is perverted (x) Bought something but never used it Song of the Moment: I'm a good boy....

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Monday, October 11, 2004

America... FUCK YEAH!!!

	Let us talk about my weekend cause it was fun and shit.... Friday Night: I took friday off in general fromw ork because my family and one of my good friends went to Busch Gardens Tampa Bay, which was fun because it wasn't 800 degrees outside. Beautiful day. So we drive home and get caught in traffic, who knew? Saturday during rush hour, traffic?? Anyway... so i get home and wait a few hours and then go out to the Rocky Horror Picture Show play/movie which was really great cause I'venever been before. But why is that Chris, you're gay! Every gay guy has been to RHPS!.... yes alas, and now so have I.... So I go back to my friend's house at about 3 in the morning and didn't get to sleep till 6... Saturday morning at 8 I wake up for some reason and I know I work today but I didn't go to bed till fuckin 6, so I call off. Stay in bed and wake up sometime later, I don't remember. Anyway, there is a sneak preview for Team America: World Police at 7:00 so I wait till about 5, go home, get somethng to eat, then go to the movies with Andrew. If you like South Park, or Baseketball, you'll like TA:WP. It's just funny in so many ways. Gross in many others. If you're like squeemish or stuff toward blood or sex, you probably shouldn't see the movie. Cause there is lots ofpuppet sex and puppet gore. Oh yeah... So after the movie we go back to Andrew's place and his sister and her husband are having a cookout there and so I just stay a bit... I drink and she took away my keys lol. Then she invited me to play poker with them cause I had expressed interest in it earlier. And I put in $3 at the beggining. They play with quarters, nickles, and dimes. I ended upw ith $26. I whooped their asses and they were kinda pissed lol. After that i went to bed and slept till noon the next day. Sunday I woke up and didn't do much of anything. I watched 3/4 of the Tampa Bay football game, they finally won I think. Then Andrew's sister left to a concert and so we sat around playing on the computer then we watched Donnie Darko which is a really good movie. And then we made dinner and then we watched jackie Brown till 12:30 am. Then i went home. Thats my weekend. Abrief overview for those who don't like to read: I saw Team America: World Police before you did and I kick ass at poker. Song of the Moment: Mad ? Why the hell was I mad?.... ohhh TV... that makes perfect sense now.

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Saturday, October 2, 2004

Another one, must be the moon...

	So Jamesy and I were talkin about sex the other day, not sure why it came up, it just did... We weren't talkin about fucking each other or anything, although if he lived closer... anyway, i digress... So yeah, is sex good or bad or what? If you've tried it before that is. If not, well then uhh.... I dunno, tell me what you think anyway. So many people use sex so wrong, especially in the gay community. Sex seems to be huge, like 90% of gay guys just want to fuck you and leave it seems. I can understand that when you're like young, but such is the case with even the weird older dudes. And even in the straight community sometimes it's like that or something, I honestly don't know. SO yeah, sex and love are two different things that peopel tend to mix up. Like if someone has sex with you, they like you and want to be with you and thats not true. It usually means they just want to get off. Yeah I dunno, does anyone read this thing anyway? lol. So yeah, I got tickets to Halloween Horror Nights for October 16th if anyone wants to... meet me there or find me and tell me how wonderful I am or some bullshit like that. I can't wait, hopefully there won't be a hurricane or anything like that which fucks me over. I'm going with a guy from work, his friends and this guy I've been seeing lately. So I hope it's all fun and stuff. Song of the Moment: Mad TV

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Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Oh my god, there's an update!

	Yeah sure, update... whatever you say :p So yeah, i can't sleep, so I'm updating, not that I have much to update with really. My life is revolving around school (when I go), work (when I work) and FUCKIN HURRICANES! I don't hate Hurricanes, as long as my power stays on, they just tend to put shit all over the god damn place and I run over it in the street and it puts holes in my tires... I'm sure we'll have another one soon. 4 hurricanes in 6 weeks... sounds fun. Charley, Frances, Ivan, and Jeanne. If I meet anyone with those names, prepare to be stabbed with a fork. What's that? Hows my life after I broke up with my boyfriend you ask? lol I'm sure you care. Anyway, it's fine. I realized its not gonna work so no need to sulk over something you know won't happen. And as everyday passes I realize it even more, even though I can't realize it much more. So yeah I'm perfectly fine, not depressed or gonna kill myself, just people with names of hurricanes... So did you hear that Conan O'Brien will be taking over the position as host of the Tonight show when jay Leno retires in 5 years? It's great. I love Conan, whom I believe is the funniest man on late night besides wristcutter. So yeah thats really cool news, I can't wait to see how it all turns out for Conan. He deserves it. Whats with the abundance of STUPID topics, or at least titles, at OB? "How is one to dance w/out looking like one's being electrocuted?" Come on now... You either know how to dance or you don't and if you don't, howis asking the question ON THE INTERNET going to help you? Why do we even allow topics with no sen elike that? Most are closed, it surprised me that one wasn't. And for the record, I'd like to state again that I hate kids, which includes anyone up the age of 14. You usually have no idea what you're talkin about, so just shut up and play video games or do things other 0-14 year olds do. Like not being online and bothering me with your stupidity. I need a drink... Song of the Moment: Conan

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Tuesday, September 7, 2004

I fucked up in life... and there's no life doctor to call...

	I have alot to say and I know alot of people don't read this and won't read this so I dunno why I bother posting but I have to get a few hundred things off my chest. So fuck you if you're not reading this. FIrst off, this weekend and following days have been total shit. First I get 2 full days of hurricane Frances the fucker, which wasn't bad itself cause we didn't lose power or anything like that, I was just stuck at home 4 days with J.J. with NOTHING to do. Regardless bad things happened. J.J. and I broke up today because I fucked up. I am so fucked up in the head that I did something I shouldn't have. I didn't cheat on him or anything, I just did something I shouldn't have and lied about it. If you absolutely truely want to know, then go read his life journal, though I rather you don't, I'd rather it not have been posted for the world to see. I'd like to keep my fucked up self between me, him, and our good friends. But he felt the need to post it, so go have a laugh fuckers. It doesn't matter anyway, its all my fault... I'm offcially screwed up the one thing in my life that matters most, and while there is a chance to reconsile and make things better, it's going to take time for him to regain his trust in me. But time has always been my enemy.... Me and Time do not get along very well. And I'm afraid time may not be on my side in this... But all I can do is wait... show him I truely do love him even though all this went down... even though I lied about it... even though it's all my fault... I have done all I can to fix it. I'm thinking about going to a therapist though... I dunno what they would say, but I need someone to tell me why I'm so fucked up... It'd be nice to know so I don't do this again. Then again I think I already know the answer, but no one believes it. We both love each other very much, I just have problems that I need to work out before we can be together again... Second, I hate my job. Well I don't hate it, I hate the people that come there and I hate some of the people that work there. I hate the fact NO ONE listens to me there. I've worked there 3 and half years. I think I know what the hell I'm doing, yet no one listens to me. I can run that fuckin place 800 times better than any of my bosses and I wouldn't even be an asshole about it. I'm fuckin tired of it. It's an uncomfortable workplace... standing all the time does no good for my knees, which begin to hurt so much I can't stand after 2 hours. Not only that it begins to get well over 90 degrees... to you in the western states thats probably nothing, but to the humidity of florida it feels like you're taken a bath in your own dirty sweat. It's disgusting... i really want to quit, but I don't think I can get a decent job now that will let me work the hours I want since I go to school full time. My boyfriend... or my ex... or I don't even know anymore... says I need to open up more. Thats the reason things went the way they did the last few days. I'm not open. So I'm gonna be open. I fuckin dislike my dad very much. I won't say hate because that would imply i don't love him, which isn't true, but sometimes I wonder why I love him the way he treats me sometimes. He feels the need to belittle me any chance he gets. He feels the need to explain things IN FULL because apparently I'm not fuckin smart enough to get it when you say turn the dial to the left and push for the correct dryer settings for my clothes... no he has to go through and explain why I then shouldn't hit any other button cause that'll just fuck things up. Then when he doesn't explain anything at all and I do something wrong, he goes and yells that I fucked it up. He over exaplains thigns I don't need to know everything about and he doesn't explain enough about things I need more explaining on... He says I'm lazy all the time cause I won't do stuff... I won't do it cause I'll do it wrong and then I'll get yelled at so why bother doing it at all. Its liek when I put dishes away in the dishwasher or clean my bathroom, he'll come in not 5 minutes later and do it all again cause I did it wrong apparently. I'm sorry, I didn't know the plastic cups had to be on the right and the glass ones on the left. Fuck me! He asks me to do stuff and then after I do it he goes back and changes everything I did. WHY THE FUCK DO YOU BOTHER ASKING if your just gonna go back and change it all. Do you know how discouraging that is to someone? Apparently I'm living my life all wrong, why don't you come fix it for me and while your at it, come back and live it for me too. And why can't I say this all to his face... because I don't have the guts to. I don't have the balls to go up to my father and tell him he's been a lousy sack of dog shit my whole life. That would make him mad... it would make me mad, and my mother would be stuck in the middle. I'd rather be hurt everytime then to hurt my mom and my dad that way. I can't be like that. I just don't know to do with my life anymore... I feel like I lost all control over it... And I don't have anyone here to talk to about it anymore... My best friend moved away, not that we ever talk about this kinda stuff... I can't talk to my mom about how much I can't stand my dad... and my boyfriend... well I don't think he wants to see me now, nor do I think he wants me to just let everything out on his shoulders. Its time like this I really need someone and I don't have anyone... I don't know how to be more open with people when I don't have anyone to be open with... I never talk about anything because I'm always ashamed of how I feel, who I am, and what I think. I know I shouldn't be... but I am. And now I have more reason to be... J.J., I dunno if you're reading this or not but I love you. I always will and I never ever meant to hurt you. I know you love me to and I'm asking you to help me through this cause I really need you to. I know it's all my fault that this even happened to begin with, so it doesn't seem fair to ask for your help to fix it after all I've done. But I'm hoping love comes over all things. And I'm hoping our love can come over this. That sounds absolutely corny and right out of some romance novel, but its really truely how I feel. I love you. Sorry this was so long... but I needed to say it. Song of the Moment: Ashamed

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Tuesday, August 3, 2004

PIEDUDE.COM!

	I don't update this so when I do you should all be shocked, surprised, in awe, and completely unaware of my prescence. Anyway, I'm going to Busch Gardens again on Friday, fun times. My boyfriend's new site is up. It's PieDude.com. It's really good and well done. You should all go check it out and post in here what you think. He'll appreciate the feedback. What else..... Better topics at OB lately... there were times when I thought that it couldn't get worse with some of the topics there. Boring bullshit topics all the time. Not that I help any, cause I rarely make topics, but still, some were bad. They seem to be getting better though. I have also been going around MyOtaku looking at who has the best designs and I would like to know what you all think to. So like post in here or ask people on your MyO, because I don't get alot of hits here, and see what they say. I'm kinda interested in seeing better designs and seeing what's liked better around here. The other day I went and bought all of the volumes of the Tranformers DVDs out. I now own all the episodes and the movie, not to mention a huge Dinobots poster lol. I love the Transformers. :) Thats it for now... Oh yeah, also catch my newest opinion in wristcutter's journal lol. Song of the Moment: Radio

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Thursday, July 22, 2004

To the person who asked in my guestbook....

	YES    I    AM    GAY!!! Thank you. On the same note, you all should visit Wrist Cutter's journal cause this one won't be updated alot, so just assume he speaks for me as well lol. Except when he talks about GLAY. Don't listen to him about them. Informercial guys are always bald, why is that? Song of the Moment: Bald informercial guy saying "exactly" over and over again

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Wednesday, July 7, 2004

Tought I mize well finish this fucker up

	28. Sasha & Digweed 27. Jars of Clay 26. Goo Goo Dolls 25. 311 24. Motley Crue 23. Creed 22. Megadeth 21. Godsmack 20. Luna Sea 19. Darude 18. Favorite Blue 17. Metallica 16. Malice Mizer 15. Days of the New 14. Nirvana 13. Penicillin 12. Rammstein 11. The Offspring 10. Porno Graffitti 09. Lenny Kravitz 08. Econoline Crush 07. Dir en grey 06. L'arc~en~Ciel 05. Gackt 04. Paul Oakenfold 03. move 02. BT 01. Paul van Dyk So there you have it. So now I'll actually say something someone might care about or find interesting to read. It's beena lmost 7 months that my boyfriend and I have been together. This is the longest relationship I've been in. Same for him. It's definitely a new experience. Although he's no ex-porn star... cough Josh cough.... but he's still quite good. ANYWAY, I'm sure he doesn't want me saying that here. Anyway, so far we've been doing really good. So what have I been doing latey? Well I just finished playing Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic for the second time. First light side, second dark side, so much better. Also attempted to play Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy... but I haven't been too intrigued with it. That and the Sims and Splinter Cell Pandora Tomorrow. I've been working too, but yeah noone wants to hear about that. Um I dunno what else to say. Wish i had the abaility or want to update this more, but I was never one to keep up with journals. Song of the Moment: Silence

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Sunday, June 6, 2004

The A.F.A. - This is long, but it needed to be said.

	The A.F.A. (American Family Association) is by far the biggest joke in America than anything I've seen in a long time. Now everyone knows what i think about Bush and his presidency, but this is just too funny to pass up. The A.F.A. is a Christian organization, which right off gives all christians a bad name. I'm so sorry for you Christians. You have this representing you. And the worst part is, most of you continue to allow this to happen. I cannot understand for the life of me why Christians do not stand up against organizations like the A.F.A. or people like Jerry Fallwell. It urkes me that you do nothing about these people who are obviously representing something so important to you. It seems you don't care by continuing to allow these people to share their irrational and ignorant views about your religion and other people. Therefor, you must become associated with them and therefor you continue to recieve a bad name from people like me. The AFA is anorganization which continues to be racists, prejudice, and ignorant toward other people. They are no better than the slave owners 165 years ago. Now i know everyone has their falicies, even someone as perfect as me heh, but there are limits to what you can and should be able to say, esspecially when you're a group who who influences so many others and a group who supposedly stands for the ideals of such a huge religion sect as the Christians none-the-less. The AFA continues to lie in order to get their belief across. I guess a family value in america is to do anything possible, even lie, to get what you want. At least thats what the impressions the AFA continues to give. Some family value. Let me go over their campaigns as of now to show you exactly what the know, what they don't know, and what they are dsoing to try to make you believe in what is obviously a lie. Their newest campaign is that of bringing awareness of the new "homosexual TV Network" beng brought out by MTV/Viacom. First off they start out by reminding us just what MTV is, the network that brought us the superbowl half time show. This is the only thing they mention about MTV. Not that MTV helps to campaign every year for young people to vote in the American presidential election. Not that MTV gave rise to some of the music stars I'm sure that these people listen to, no they focus on the one recent thing which supposedly corrupted family values so much. I'm confused, but tell me how does a breast corrupt family values? Are the family values in America so WEAK that a simple breast would corrupt them so much? The article goes on to say that the name of this network will be called "LOGO." Well the AFA jumps to the conclusion that LOGO is a play on the greek word logos, which means God. They have no basis for that claim, they just assumed so much. I suppose they should have a campaign against LEGOS for also being a play on the word, yet no such thing has happened. The last and final complaint is that this station will be part of your basic cable set up. Meaning that if you have basic cable you will get this channel, so naturally they are FREAKING OUT! They claim they shoul dnot have to pay to have this channel. Listen all you little nimrods, you will be paying the same amount of money regardless if you have this channel or not. And if you don't like the channel, CHANGE IT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE. I get those annoying evangelist channels but you don't see me whining like a little baby over it. You have a remote, you have different channels so change them and enjoy your freedom of choice in America like everyone else. Another campaign is that against gay marriage naturally. In fact 90% of this site focuses on something dealing with homosexuals. Someone tell me again why homosexuality is such a horrible thing to families? How does who I date, who I kiss, who I fall in love with, who I have sex wit have ANYTHING to do with whatever the hell it is you do? And it's not that so much as it is that they are claiming we are ruining the sanctity of married. They ever hada doctor write a book about how marriage is ruined via the gay community. Ok, first off devout Christian and doctor don't go together. CHristians live on a basis of faith, doctors live on a basis of science, these two do not go together, therefor any devout Christian doctor has no good stand on whatever he/she is saying, esspecially on morality. Second, sorry to tell all you straight people whom say we are destroying the sanctity of married, YOU already did that. The sanctity of married was destroyed when Henry VIII got married 6 times. Refresh my memory, how long ago was that? And even today what is left of the sanctity of married continues to be destroyed by STRAIGHT PEOPLE. The divorce rate is at all all time high and getting higher, people rasing their kids with one parents and often times NO parent. I'm sorry but anything that was left of the sanctity of marriage has long been depleted and it wasn't by gay people, thats for sure. Straight people seem to be doing just fine doing that on their own. Its not that its really a horrible thing, i just don't like to be blamed for something I didn't do. The AFA also is campaigning religious freedom. I was shocked at first, wondering how an organization so tied to the Chritian faith would support religious freedom, but then i realized they aren't. They just want religious freedom for themselves. The damn anything not Christian, but when something attacks them as they have attacked others, they ge all defensive and plead for religious freedom. In one such case, a kid was suspended from school for wearing a shirt that said "Homosexuality is Shameful" and they automatically jumped up and defended this kid's right to speech. It's wuite obvious in their attention to family values so much, they forgot the own law of their country. Kids don't have freedom of speech, and if they did, it wouldn't aply in school anyway. The Supreme Court has made numerous rulings on this, apparently the AFA was too busy going through a divorce to read their history books. A school can pretty much do anything it wants on it's property. It can search any personal item including a car or locker for any reason. The school can tell you how to dress, thats why dress codes are allowed in school. They can tell you what you can say, what you can't say and how you can say it. They could get away with murder if they really wanted to. Sorry AFA, but a kid has no right to be wearing a shirt that says Homosexuals are shameful to school. That is a corruption of the learning system implaced in the school and someone such as yourself so based on family values should realize that. Secondly, what the hell kind of family allows their child to have and wear that shirt? You demeen family values by allowing such stupidity and ignorance into your house. I bet a million dollars the child who wore that shirt has a single mother or father. So much for family values. I would love to go into more about how absolutely ridiculous the AFA is but I'm sure you see from what I've already said. If you want to read more slander, which by the way is illegal, you may go to www.afa.net and read all their bullshit from head to toe. People want to know why I don't like America or why I don't like organized religion and alot of Christians to be specific, it's because our country and the people of this country allow groups like this to imfluence how they think or to reinforce how they believe. It's sad. This will be the demise of our country, not gay rights. You are ruining the one country you love because you are blind in both eyes... There is no hope if this continues. Song of the Moment: Silence

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