Monday, November 17, 2003

i honestly don't know why i even fucking bother. i mean, half of my art that i love and think is great all the fucks here think it's crap. bloody shit i just don't understand. it get's so damned furstrating. doesn't help my goddamned self esteem and it just makes me annyoing and rant to my friends who dont' want to hear it. no one must like the style i do things in. an dobviously no one likes my deent fan art. i need a fucking tablet. NOW.
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Thursday, November 13, 2003

WTF. i draw an Inuyasha, for the first time, it turns ut WONDERFUL in my opinion, i did it ALL in photoshop with a MOUSE. i hasa rating of 33fucking% someone else does a colored Inuyasha in PENCIL, not that good of coloring (i'm not trying to bahs it, it is a good pib) and it hasa 86%. wtf. why the hell does no one like my art, i'll never understand this bs. no one on oekaki seems to understand i do my stuff with a mouse, cuz i don't own a tablet. and my actual drawings are usually done in school sometime, and turn out god fro no references. >.<
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Sunday, November 9, 2003

my lips part, to say the words,
before i can i'm silenced.
finger on my lips..shhh.
little words mean big things
understanding is the world to me,
and at last i am accepted.
lips lock, hand entangled, thoughts
drifted away, surrounded by the bliss
endless fields of love, lost in a wave
consumed by the flames.
i am at last free.

sry, it's been in my AIM profile for a while and i need a place to save it ^^
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Sunday, November 2, 2003

why? i mean, i love him so much, well i think i do, what with all the bloody mind fucking with emotions doesn't help me, but still, it's confusing, we don't talk too much, and there's only a few things between us that are little nothing, i'm too fucking Idealistic, mother fuck. and i'm developing something for her now. that's bad. i mean, i know she's not bisexual or a lesbian, so i know nothing will happen, i mean, i've had crushes on nearly al of the girls i'm friends, and i still have little ones clinging onto me. i want so despreately for her to have someone, if not me then the one that she likes, i want to make him see that she's an awesome person and that she's likes him. oi, and mine, he's just confsuing, nothing will happen, i'm sure of it, it just felt good. it feels god. being able to hugglesomeone, someone to sleep on and cuddle wiht. but it sometimes feels like so much more to me, but deep down i know it's nothing at all, and never will be, and it makes me somewhat depressed. and then the anal-retentive bastard and Co. won't stop pissing me off, i'm so close to breaking down for no rela reason. it's just my head. and i don't wana tell the people that i care about, they prolly won't want to know what i'm thinking b/c it's stupid. stupid stupid julia. fuck you. gahhhhh. hate hate. i want him the most, i want her to be happy, and i want the longest crush of all to have someone to love her and cherish her, b/c she deserves it. oi, not like anyone cares what i want anyway.
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Wednesday, October 29, 2003

bloody hell you all must hate wel worked on art, a 39% on my inuyasha! gyahhh, i spent so much time and effort!
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Tuesday, October 28, 2003

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well, i've decided to list all the anime's i like, meanign what i've: seen, seen part of, read about, read the manga, or just want to see.
Weiss Kreuz
Gundam Wing
Trigun
Inuyasha
Cowboy Bebop
Ronin Warriors
Mars(manga)
Dragon Knights (manga)
Magic Knights Rayearth(manga)
Escaflowne
Evangelion
Chobits(manga)
Love Hina(manga)
Fruits Basket
Witch Hunter Robin(wanna seeeee, can't wait)
Di Gi Charat(manga)
Dragonball/z/gt
Angel Sanctuary ( <3<3<3<3<3 )
Sailor Moon
Cardcaptors(the non-butchered version)
Digimon
Outlaw Star
X
Final Fantasy(although i haven't played them)
Revolutionary Girl Utena


There are probably more...
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Sunday, October 26, 2003

gyahhhhhhhhhh!!!!
no one wil lsee my new art becasue other people's are uplaoded! bah on them!!! i'll have to re-re-uplaod them so peoplecan see themmmmmmmm bah on everything.
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because not many people read this, i can write what i want to! =d party was fun last nite, i love kevin so much, i hope something happens. really do (yea, something has happened i mean something more) eeee, fun fun fun, too bad my mom saw us kiss goodbye, that woudl be bad if nothing happens, cuz then she'd be like "blah blah blah" oiii, but so much fun. loveie loveie lovie
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Tuesday, October 21, 2003

bah. people must not like my work, i should just stop uploading my crap then.
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