AIM • TehVampireKitty E-mail •Click Here Website •Click Here Yahoo! Messenger • lil_evil_monkey123
Vitals
Birthday • 1990-01-30 Gender •
Female Location • Lost and not found Member Since • 2005-06-17 Occupation • Nothing Real Name • Kitty
Personal
Achievements • I have lost almost everything. Anime Fan Since • Forever Favorite Anime • Too many to type. Goals • I have a different goal every day. Hobbies • Computer Talents • Dancing, singing/screaming, math, writing, ballet, skateboarding, hurting people. Ask if you wanna know anymore.
myOtaku.com: Tsukitheninjawolf
Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
*Warning:: Really Long Post Below*
CURRENT Day: Oct. 9th
Days Left till Halloween: 22
Days Left till Randy gets out: 16
Time typed: Midnight
Mood: Lost, Forgotten, Dead, Depressed, Almost drunk.
I have let my addictions take over. Given up all hope of ever returning back. Cold, lost and forgotten as I sit in my corner. Shaking from fear and anger. Losing control again. They won't go away. They won't shut up. Reminding me over and over about how I lost you. In this world so cold and dark I cry out. Hoping you will hear me, but you never do. Trapped in a cage. Away from me. Never knowing what is next as I search in the dark. I can't find you. I'm trapped in the darkness that lies within me. The light has left. You have left. Never again to smile upon hearing your voice or hear those three little words. You have lost me. I am forever gone.
I don't know what that exactly is above, but that is whats going through my mind. By the way its not you as in you, its you as in Randy.
The voices are back. Haunting my every move. Watching me and yelling at me. Telling me I'm not good enough, not pretty enough, and that I am the one that put Randy away. I wish they would stop. Go away forever. But will they ever fully go away? I don't think they will. They are like the memories that haunt my dreams. The blood, the screams, the fights, the words my mother so harshly told me. The images of the blood pouring down and making the pool of blood on the floor. How I use to urge to see that beautiful liquid pour from my veins to the floor. The beautiful liquid that I want to see drip from other people now. The hate that is consuming me as it did my mother. The love that will kill me in the long run as it did to my mother. I fear I am turning into her, the monster I hated for so long. I wonder if this was her plan from the beginning. To make me become her. Maybe she never planned on killing me, just hurting me. I don't really know anymore. But I am becoming her either way. A cold, hateful person that needs others pain to survive. I she her face in the ceiling, watching me. Planning to kill me again and a again.
I just wish I could hear his voice, even if its for 5 seconds. I keep replaying the conversations we had together. Reading the things he told me. Crying myself to sleep. Drinking non-stop because its the only way to numb the feeling of loneliness. Smoking a pack sometimes even two a day. Telling myself 'He'll be back soon' and the dying. I miss him so much I cant eat anymore. Getting Paler and Skinner. Having to wear make-up to hid the black circles from lacking sleep. Holding in Yawns. How I miss him so much. I am getting sick and tired of having to always fake my happiness. I am happy when I talk to a few people because they help me remember I'm not completely alone [Char-char is the most important]. But all I can do is wait.
I'm going to shut up now. And finish the rest of my Whiskey.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
CURRENT Day: Oct. 3rd
Days Left till Halloween: 28
Days Left till Randy gets out: 22
Time typed: ~8:30
Mood: Read whole post. -_-
Ok So I am back in my wonderful Depression again. This really sucks. I try and try to be happy, then I look at my MSN Messenger and see Randy's Screen names and then go through my phones contacts and see Randy's number and then I can't stop crying. I rally am losing it. I miss him so much and I don't want it to hurt so much. I don't feel like I have a reason to wake up anymore. All I wanna do is sleep and cry. Since Randy went to jail I lost ~13 pounds. I don't weigh that much to begin with and its not good that I'm losing weight. I do my make-up and by the time I get home after school I have black tear stains. I try and try to act happy at school, but I have given up on tha a lil. Now I only act happy when I'm either A) Around alot of people OR B) Not completely Zoned out of my mind and the teacher is near. I guess I'm become "emoer" than usually. I cut down on smoking, but I'm not gunna quit. I'm still cutting though. I found something that cuts my skin, witch lemme tell you wasn't easy. So yeah. King Char-char [LOL] has been helping me out lately. I'm losing Steven again, but he is so set on the fact that I don't need him and that he isn't good enough for me. So all I can do is try, right? I don't wanna have to wait 22 more days for Randy to get out, but I guess I don't really have a choice. He is on my mind day and night. I remember our conversation so well. Sometimes I catch myself talking to myself now. I think I may need to go to a mental Institution, but I can't bring myself to go to one. I feel like I'm losing everything and everyone. Like I've been chained to a chair and forced to just watch it all end again. [I won't explain what I mean by again, if you don't know too fucking bad.] I feel so alone and empty again. My eyes haven't been lying lately. They have been empty, hollow looking, just like me. They don't have the shine that use to be there when I talked to Randy. They don't have any beautiful color. They are just back to the Dark Gray-Green shade they use to be. I don't know anymore. I'm losing it. And the worst part is, I knew this was going to happen again.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
New Fucking Post. BE HAPPY PEOPLE
Mood: Tired of this world and the people in it.
I'm tired of people telling me what I would feel. LOOK I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT STEVEN ANYMORE!!! HE DROPPED ME, SO I STOPPED FUCKING CARING ABOUT HIM!!! HE IS GETTING WHAT HE DESERVES!!! No one hurts me. I don't fucking like getting hurt. I hurt enough not having Randy here with me. Why hurt me more? That makes no sense. *sighs*
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
Ello people. This aint a fun morning. I'm not going to school today. My thorat hurts really badly. Like someone is taking a cats claws and clawing it up. So, I'm home today. Y'all can talk to me on MSN [ atheist_kitten@hotmail.com ] if ya wont. My other ones are listed at the bottom of my About Me. Section. I'm gunna go. Oh and Char-char, I need hugs :(
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
Day: figure it out
Time: 9:15
Mood: RAWR
Listening to: Char-Char talk ^^
NEW LAYOUT! RATE THE FUCKER NOW! CHAR-CHAR LOVES ME MORE THAN YOU [anyone, but kay]!!!! PIE! I'll post later.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
Day: Friday
Time: 5 somthin
Mood: Avoiding emotions so...nothin really.
Listening to: Already Over by: Red
Ok so I was thinking and the best way to not feel alone, is to think that you aren't and if anyone tells you that you are you just say no i'm not and keep on being happy. Use your imagination 24 fuckin 7. ^^ So that is what I am doing. I'm just thinking Randy isn't in jail. He still calls every night and tells me he loves me. Stevo isn't going to ditch me. My dog never died. My real father still play the piano untill i fall asleep every night. He never died. My real mom never did any of the shit she did. She never tried to Kill me, she also never killed herself and my dad. None of my friends, that I use to love dearly, never left me. I am not killing myself by not eating. I am not smoking myself to death. I am not crying myself to death. I am not emotionally unstable and I should not go to a mental institution to get the help i don't need. I am not dying from a heart break. Nothing bad has ever happened to me. My life has been perfectly happy. That is what I am telling myself I will continue to till it comes true.
Yes, I am smoking again. It makes me calmer than what I usually am. I am crying myself to sleep, because I can't hear his voice or talk to him at all. I am not eating, because when I see food it makes me cry even more. It makes me remember him even more than I already do. And. Yes, I am crying right now. I know what the reality is. I'm just not gunna live in it. ^^
Ok so yeah. I've updated. Comment if you wish. It may make me feel alil better.
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
Day: Sunday
Time: Early enough for me to pass out soon.
Mood; ^ Tired as I said above.
Listening to- Zander ^^
Ok. So Ello people. I am so fucking tired. Yup yup. I need more sleep. What? I'm a lazy person. And OMG. My music has words *gasp* Lol. ^^ Yes I changed my music. TO MUSIC WITH WORDS!!! OMG! THE WORLD IS GOING TO END -_- Get over it people.
So.....yesterday I was talking to a person and then they go and leave me...it made me sad.
I am calling Stevo at like 8. He is going to see Randy today. Yup yup Stevo = Bestestestestest Friend. Lol. Try saying that in a Texan accent...It doesn't really work. Lol.
I miss him...alot...I know I say it alot, but I think it alot more. :( Why he have to go to jail and leave me all alone?
Name: Kitty.
Age: 18.
Birthday: January 30th.
Currently: Texas
Education: G.E.D.
Currently Reading: American Psycho
Email: [Link]
Myspace: [Link]
Hobbies: Technology, what few friends I have, Reading, and Dancing.
Hates: Alot of shit. Mainly fakes.
MSN: Atheist_Kitten@hotmail.com
AIM: My Bloodydeath13 &
Tehvampirekitty
So I figured I would use an already made layout. I just don't have time right now to make it myself. Other wise I so would have. Plus it's pretty.
Anywayz. Please sign my guestbook if you stop by for the first time. Even though I have a few rules. They are below.
I don't know how often I will update. I will try for everyday, but considering school and the fact I am actually reading a book, I may not be able too.
Have a nice day. Peace.
Kitty
Rules
Sign more than 1 fucking line in my guestbook.
Visit me and I will visit you.
Don't fuck with me.
Last but not least, if you hate me, don't tell me you do. I don't really care if you do.
Post
Day: Friday
Time: 5:30
Mood: RAWR....Happy [not sure why]...annoyed at this laptop...
Listening to: KIM POSSIBLE [I HATE YOU KIM]
I HATE SCHOOL! It is as boring as FUCK! Ok maybeh fuck ain't boring, BUT THAT AIN'T THE POINT!!
So me going to call Stevo today. YAY!!! ^^ He isn't all GRRR anymore. ^^ I GOTS A BESTEST FRIEND AGAIN!!!!!!!!!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!!
I love you Geometry you are so much easier than ENGLISH FUCKING 2!!!!!! I HATE ENGLISH!!!
I HATE YOU ENGLISH BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO FUCKING CONFUSING!!! WHO NEEDS ENGLISH?!?!?!?!
