Birthday • 1989-12-18 Gender •
Female Location • West Virginia Member Since • 2005-02-05 Occupation • Student Real Name • You Don't Need To Know
Personal
Achievements • Who Gives A Shit? Anime Fan Since • 1993 Favorite Anime • Yu Yu Hakusho, Yu-Gi-Oh, Beyblade, Gundam Seed, Gundam Wing/AC, Wolf's Rain, X/1999, Vampire Hunter D, Trigun, Saiyuki, Rurouni Kenshin, Inuyasha, Full Metal Alchemist, D N Angel, and Chobits. Goals • Nothing really Hobbies • Writing poems/stoires, playing the keyboard, singing. Talents • Look above!
myOtaku.com: TwistedNightmare
Friday, January 12, 2007
A LONG rant...... just read
Things here…. Well…. To be honest, there not doing so well. Everything is, you know, falling apart. It’s like the whole world is crashing down on my shoulders…. Well, not that bad but you get the idea. I just… I don’t understand why things are the way they are. At the rate it’s going, someone is going to seriously get hurt during this whole ordeal. Who it is, I don’t know. Maybe I should recap some….
On Wednesday night, I don’t know; say around 8 or 9 o-clocks at night. My mother and father stepped out into the garage and I don’t know what really happened next, but I heard a loud bang. You know, BANG! Then I hear my mom scream ”Stop it! Stop! Stop it!” continuously. The only thing running through my mind is, ’Here we go again.’ I walk outside and find the trash can on the ground in piece and my mother has tears streaming down her eyes…. Well, things got ugly from there. Let’s just say that we now have a new hole in the wall and a door hanging from one hinge with broken hanger on the ground…. Nice…. Anyway, my mom left for an hour or so and then came back threw her keys at that bastard and then went into her room… Didn’t see her from the rest of the evening…. Well, Dave (my father) now sleeps in the guest bedroom and I could really care less. So yeah…. Sounds fun, huh? I had to play referee during the whole ordeal.
Well, after the fight, I had asked Dave if he need any help in cleaning up and this is what he told me, honest to god it’s the truth, ”No, I don’t need any help….. You know what, we were fighting about you. You’re lazy and you don’t do anything and your mom got all defensive when I said this. Your brother does more than you…….” It was silence after that…. My answer was, ”Thank you….. I try….. Bye.” When I got to the bottom of the stairs, my dad yells, ”Thanks for the help!” sarcastically and I replied with, ”You said you didn’t need any.” I went about my business and completely ignored the bastard from there on end….
Anyway, it’s no surprise that they were fighting about me… Dave always finds a way to put the blame on me. I always do something wrong to piss him off, what I do is beyond me. I’m too lazy, too moody, too sarcastic, too fat, too something and it apparently pisses him off. Bastard! who the hell does he think he is? King of the World? The bastard hasn’t done anything productive in the last month besides tear up the house and put a dint in my mother’s car…. Way to go, bastard! Want a fucking medal for your effort?
I swear I hate the guy. Ever since I was little, I was always put down by him because I always got into trouble. I always got suspended from school or had the police called on me…. Well, no one is fucking perfect. He would pick me up from school and when we got home, he’d hit me with the belt and call me names and say I was a failure. He would never ask why I got into trouble or what was going on… He just assumed…. That’s all he’s ever good at… assuming things.
Like our predicament. We’re short on cash because my mother’s boss died and she’s been unemployment for a month or two now. He blames all of our financial stuff on her, like it’s her fault her boss died. But he forgets that he is the one who lost all of our money, our savings that we were going to use on the patio and to pay off bills, in the stock market, even though he promised my mother that he wouldn’t put it there. He doesn’t blame himself that he lost nearly 20,000 dollars in the fucking stock market….. That’s a lot of money…..
Anyway, I’m just sick of him putting us all down. It isn’t the men in the family that he puts down, oh no, it’s the women. Like we’re worthless or something likes that. I’m too lazy and my mother is stupid, or so he says…. I’m tired, alright. Just flat out tired of being treated as if I don’t exist, you know. I hate feeling so worthless and I hate feeling so empty… so numb. It’s beginning to get to me. I try to stay strong, really I do, but sometimes I wish I could just throw myself in traffic or something like that. I know my mom feels the same.
Anyway, that has been my shitty week. I’m sorry if I sound dramatic or whiny or whatever. I know everyone has their set of problems…. Anyway, if you read this whole entry, then thanks for being there and listening… well, reading, but same thing. I just had to get it off my chest…. You know. Well, later….
Word of the Day: albatross [AL-bah-tros'] (noun)
1. A large web-footed bird of the southern hemisphere having long narrow wings and noted for powerful gliding flight
2. An oppressive burden or handicap: "The verbal learning disability was an albatross that ran in the family for generations." Origin- approximately 1672; probably an alteration of 'alcatras': a large sea bird, possibly influenced by Latin 'albus': white. Second definition is an allusion to the albatross in 'The Rime of the Ancient Mariner,' by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, which the mariner killed and had to wear around his neck as a penance.
Quote of the Day: “Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional.” –Unknown
A LONG rant...... just read
