Monday, July 26, 2004

   I'm so good at convincing...

You came from the sky. Your a daydreamer and prefer
to have a good look on situations.


Where did you come from?
brought to you by Quizilla
I've pressured--er, I mean "convinced" another person I know to join myotaku! His name is Otaking and I should very much appreciate it if everyone who catches this message goes off and visits him. That'd be nice! ^^

So anyways, I got a voicemail from Andrea. You know that lil wretch had the nerve to accuse me of "hanging up" on her and how I never picked up the phone when she tried to call back? She's got some nerve! When I tried to call her back, she was on the line with her boyfriend! Then she turns around and asks me if I'd like to go bowling with them on Thursday before tae kwan do! I had half a mind to call her up and scream "F*CK YOU, YOU WHINY LIL MIDGET!". I didn't do it though--first I went out shopping to cool my anger, and that urge went down to calling her up and telling her to go to hell. I haven't done that yet. I'm actuallys starting to zen-ify as I write this. This is very good for her. I'm so sick of being jerked around by that twit! I wish Sorccy wasn't gone--she and I would go cruise by Andrea's house in my lil red car, yell "neener neener neener" out the sun roof, and then peel off. Ah well!

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Chapter Two
Are You My Mommy?

Cheiki and Maxwell arrived at the King’s Ball just in time for the Hero’s Roll Call. The Roll Call was necessary—heroes from ALL around the world had traveled to enjoy this royal party, and as they ALL were heroes, proper introductions had to be made. As Maxwell was the hometown hero of this particular King’s Ball, it was natural that her introduction was the first one made, and the longest. The hometown advantage is, after all, always the best. Once the royal name-caller had finished her introduction, Maxwell was allowed to swagger down the red carpet, give the King and Queen her most gallant bow, and then take her place to the right of the King.
Cheiki was next to be called, having saved the kingdom next door from certain destruction. She was more subtle in her hubris, saving all her dramatics for her bow to the King and Queen. She took her place next to Maxwell, and promptly slumped into a very bored posture. She had very good reason to—the list of heroes was particularly long that year, as many kingdoms had spit in the faces of the gods and required single-handed rescue from certain destruction.
Maxwell soon followed Cheiki’s bored position, though she promptly snapped out of it when she set eyes on her potential wife. He was from some region Maxwell was unfamiliar with, had done something Maxwell had missed in the introduction, and was, all-in-all, a very strange and attractive man. He was short in height, though he made up for it with sheer arrogance. A broadsword nearly as tall as himself was strapped to his back—the leather sheath was well-loved and oiled to a dark shine. His muscular arms were bare, his well-muscled chest covered with a silk tank-top; his black silk pants were tied at the waist with a red sash, and the legs tucked into fine leather boots that reached his knee. A white band covered his forehead and disappeared into his blacker-than-midnight hair—sed hair stood straight back from his face and head, and was marked by a starburst of white at the front. His eyes were almond-shaped, dark and piercing, and his mouth was pulled into what seemed to be a perpetual frown. He stalked down the carpet way, gave the King and Queen a short bow, and promptly skulked to a darker corner of where the other heroes had gathered. His pride was palpable, off-setting most of the other heroes. Maxwell, on the other hand, was in love. “Now HE would make a fine mother for my Seraphine, don’t you think?” She whispered to Cheiki, her amber eyes sparkling with delight as she watched the young man’s progress.
Cheiki rolled her eyes and snorted derisively. “I didn’t think you liked your men short and snotty.”
“I’ve found that it makes them easier to carry off.” Maxwell replied good-naturedly…

It wasn’t until the end of the Hero Roll Call that Cheiki found her ideal child-mother. The man was tall, elegant, waif-ish…fey-like. He was pale as royalty, with wide green eyes. He filled the room with the scent of roses, and his rich silk (and obviously foreign) clothing was embroidered with the blooms of love. Cheiki’s jaw dropped when he crossed the room. “I don’t care if the only thing he’d agree to mother is my goldfish, I MUST have him.” She breathed.
“I thought you didn’t date men prettier than you.” Maxwell said wryly.
“Shut your mouth.” Cheiki commanded angrily.
“Well what do you know…I think he and my soon-to-be wife are friends. Your redhead is talking to him and my lovely little man isn’t killing him.” Maxwell grinned devilishly. “I wonder what the best way to propose is?” she mused.
“You’ll probably wind up scaring him off, if you propose in the usual way.” Cheiki pointed out.
“At least I’ve never threatened to throw a man over my shoulder and march him off Viking-style.” Maxwell replied.
“You say this like it’s a bad plan.” Cheiki said.
Maxwell thought about that. “You’re right…if that beautiful little creature doesn’t agree to my proposal, then he goes over my shoulder.”
“You know you could probably throw him in your purse and make off with him that way. It’d be less noticeable.” Cheiki teased.
Maxwell thought about THAT for a moment.
“I was just kidding!” Cheiki replied hastily…

The Hero’s Roll Call may have ended late, but the party still commenced. After all, heroes from all over the world had come in for this party, and many were in desperate need of wives. The party wasn’t going to end until SOMEBODY got married. Cheiki and Maxwell made their appropriate rounds around the royalty, giving the proper head-nod to the proper folk, until at last they were free of social obligations and could pursue their…interests. They zeroed in on the crimson-haired fey and his short, shadowy companion. Cheiki approached the redhead immediately, and gave him her grandest self-introduction. “Cheiki—hero extraordinaire. I single-handedly saved the kingdom next door from certain destruction a few years ago.” She said, grinning broadly.
The beautiful fey blushed. “I’m flattered by your attentions—I am Kurama, of the botanical regions.”
“Ah, the land of Bo-Tany.” Maxwell said. “Maybe, if we see each other around, you could give me daughter a lesson in gardening?” she asked coyly. “We could always use the help.” She added silkily.
Cheiki dealt her a subtle but painful elbow to the stomach. “Remember your objective.” She hissed.
“Oh right…” Maxwell replied, taking a moment to refocus. In the meanwhile, her dark-haired lovely had moved away from their little group and was standing alone by an open window. He was deliciously primed for an in-depth introduction. Maxwell flashed Cheiki a wink, and then sidled up behind the young man. A devilish grin was plastered to her face, as she reached down and patted his rump…once…twice…three times, and ended her little introduction with a pinch.
The young man whirled around, indignant and armed. Suddenly his broad sword was limp at his side. Lucky for Maxwell, no man in the universe could resist her devilish grin—it was a gift from the gods themselves, so it was said.
“Hello darling. Would you like to be my wife?” Maxwell asked slyly, cocking an eyebrow coyly.
Flustered, the young man could only stutter some obscenities that failed to adequately express his mortification.
“You’re so cute when you’re flustered beyond words.” Maxwell replied.
Outraged and embarrassed, the young man stormed off. Maxwell was quick to pursue. “Oh darling, wait up! I love you as much as I love my shoe collection!” She called after him. Granted it may not have been the most romantic thing to say, but Maxwell was something of a shoe-fetishist, and therefore this was indeed a great compliment…

Cheiki watched Maxwell chase the unfortunate young man out of the hall.
“Your friend should tread cautiously. Hiei is the Nikenji region.” The previously unofficially introduced Kurama said.
“Don’t they share a border with Hell?” Cheiki asked.
He nodded solemnly.
“Fabulous. Maxwell loves men with dirty pasts.”
“Are all heroes that mad?” Kurama asked, giving her a very worried look.
“Just Maxwell.” Cheiki assured him. “She personally fought the King of Hell, and I think it drove her just the tiniest bit crazy.” Cheiki shrugged. “It’s all right though—she’s still an excellent father.”
“Goodness!” Kurama exclaimed. “She has a child?”
“A daughter, as a matter of fact. We both do.” Cheiki replied pleasantly.
Kurama’s cheeks pinked, and his eyes grew soft. “You’re both so lucky. I’ve always wanted a family to care for.” He said.
Cheiki grinned broadly. ‘Then marry me—my daughter needs a mother and I need a wife.” She said straight-forwardly.
His eyes widened, and he gaped at her. “So suddenly!” Kurama exclaimed.
Cheiki took his hand, and brought it to her lips. She kissed it, and gave it a squeeze. “I’m a mortal woman, sweet fey prince. I don’t have time for proper courting.”
“Just how old are you?” the deliciously handsome fey-man asked.
“Old enough to know better than to answer that.” Cheiki replied. “Now give me an answer I like before I throw you over my shoulder and carry you out Viking-style.”
Kurama put his hands on his hips. “I’d say yes, but your way sounds more fun.” He teased.
Cheiki almost fell over trying to get Kurama over her shoulder—for a sexy little prince of fairies, he was heavier than he looked. “How about this way instead? I’d hate for someone to get a look at your goods.” She declared as she held him bridal-fashion in her arms.
Kurama wrapped his arms around her neck. “Carry me away, my hero!” he declared. “And tell me all about the wonderful family I’m marrying into.” He added sweetly…

Maxwell caught up with the improperly introduced Hiei outside, in the gardens. She did so by leaping on his back and bringing him to the ground. The two tumbled around for a few moments, before Maxwell managed to pin the sexy young man to the ground. “I’ve got you now darling.” She purred.
“Horrible woman, get off me!” Hiei roared.
“Only if you vow to be my wife and take care of my little girl.” Maxwell replied, running her hands through his hair.
“I’m too young to be saddled with such an old husband!” Hiei protested.
Maxwell glared at him. “I’m not THAT old.” She said sulkily.
An embarrassed and worrisome titter escaped Hiei’s smooth, kissable lips. “I mean I’d love to marry you and take care of your daughter. Really I would.” He said.
“Don’t say anything you don’t mean. It’s a horrible thing to do, especially when a woman has been affected by Cupid’s arrow on first sight.” Maxwell replied with a pout, sitting back on her heels. She still had Hiei pinned to the ground with her muscular buttocks.
“Why can I not resist you?” Hiei demanded angrily. He already knew the reason why—he couldn’t resist crazy women. Crazy women just rocked his world.
“Because my patron God, Hades, has decreed it so.” Maxwell replied light-heartedly.
Hiei’s legs were starting to numb.
“That and you have to admit it’d be a nice lifestyle being married to a hero who’s in favor with the king, receives a hefty yearly stipend, and owns her own house.” Maxwell continued.
Hiei’s legs were starting to tingle.
“Well fine then.” Maxwell said haughtily, getting up. “I’ll go back inside and find someone else to marry. Someone who’s even more beautiful and stronger than you.” She turned on her heel, and started to stalk back inside.
Along with great beauty comes great vanity—Maxwell’s empty threat was not so empty to Hiei. He leapt at Maxwell’s retreating and stylish figure, and knocked her to the ground. He managed to capture her wrists and turn her over—after all, it was his turn to be on top. “I’ll marry you so long as you promise to treat me with dignity.” Hiei said.
“Oh you’re just so adorable. I love you even more than my shoe collection, to include my Gucci heels.” Maxwell sighed. Now that was a sign of true love—the price tag on Gucci anything was a testament to wealth and status, and to love something more than those price tags was to be the absolute epiphany of all those old love songs our parents still listen to on the radio. “Of course I’ll treat you with dignity—I’ll do pretty much anything you want! You’ll have half the world on a silver platter and then some!”
“Why only half?” Hiei demanded with a pout.
“Because my little girl has the other half and then some.” Maxwell replied.
“Is she a good kid?” he asked.
“Definitely.”
“Okay then…just checking…”
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