Sunday, October 9, 2005

Death Cab for Cutie
"All Is Full Of Love"

You'll be given love
You'll be taken care of
You'll be given love
You have to trust it,

Maybe not from the sources
you have poured yours
maybe not from the directions
you are staring at,

Twist your head around
it's all around you
all is full of love
all around you,

All is full of love
you just aint receiving
all is full of love
your phone is off the hook
all is full of love
your doors are all shut
all is full of love!

All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love


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Tuesday, October 4, 2005

If your eyes say yes.
Hey everybody. I changed my song! This is another really great song, i hope you guys enjoy it. Heh, i know yer eyes aren't blue, Ari, oh well. ^_^

Cary Brothers - Blue Eyes


Wish enough, wise man'll tell you a lie
Window broke, torn up screens
Who'd have thought that you'd dream
Of a single tragic scene

I just wanna sing a song with you
I just want to take it off of you

Cause Blue Eyes
You are all that I need
Cause Blue Eyes
You’re the sweet to my mean

Fess it up, dot on the palm of your hand
I can help you to stand
Saved it up for this dance
Tell me all the things you can

I just wanna sing a song with you
I just wanna be the one that's true

Cause Blue Eyes
You’re the secret I keep
Cause Blue Eyes

All the lights on and you are alive
But you can't point the way to your heart
So sublime, when the stars are aligned
But you don't know
You don't know the greatness you are

Cause Blue Eyes
You are destiny's scene
Cause Blue Eyes
I just wanna be the one

I just wanna sing a song with you
I just wanna get it on with you

Cause Blue Eyes
You’re the secret I keep
Cause Blue Eyes
I just wanna sing a song with you…

____________________________________________________________________

Well, things are going alright with me. I worry about college stuff now and then, band and school keeps me busy, and Ari is my escape from it all. Next week is fall break, so hopefully i'll be able to get some time in to relax and whatnot. I don't plan to waste the entire week though. I'm gonna do some stuff, maybe study for the ACT/SAT or something like that. Probably apply for some colleges, who knows. I'm looking forward to it.

Things are going good with Ari and I. Though everything's not perfect. I just wish i could take a plane to Ohio right now and give her a biiig hug and fly back in time for school. Well, i might do more than giver her a hug, but that's besides the point 0_0. Hahaha. And all in all, i think the future is taking too long to get here. Damn it my leg's asleep (remember the step analogy).

If i become a really awesome engineer i'll make a teleporter. That way i can go anywhere and still only be a couple steps away from Ari. Or at least so i can make her a sandwich whenever she runs out of yummy foods at her home. Hehe, and i'd probably end up giving her about everything i have. Ari, you want an ipod? How about a gamecube? Oh, you want a new computer? Sure thing! Hah, maybe it'll come true one day! Ya never know 0___0

Later everyone.

::hug:: i love you Ari.
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Monday, October 3, 2005

If life were a gem, then you're what makes mine shine
Just some random sappiness i thought up while doing the laundry.

Well, i've been busy lately. Friday night was a football game. We lost against White House. I don't really remember anything else that happened, it was such a long time ago.

Saturday was our first band competition. Pulaski. It's about a 3 hour drive. We won everything, the grand champions! Hurray! Eh, but it's no big deal. The bands there were all really small bands. Like, our band has only 88 members, and we were the biggest band there. It was sad watching some of the bands. One band had these 3 color guard members that were just horrible. One of 'em had no idea what she was doing and was always like a whole beat behind. Another one forgot a whole section of her stuff and did nothing, when she realized it she said "oh shit!" We could hear it! It's sad that you can hear somebody say that over the band! Another band had one pit member, another band had two color guard members. It was bad. But a couple bands were decent. Ours totally rawked though. Hehe.

We performed twice during the day, once for festival and once for competition. We got straight ones in festival. Hurray!

Between the performances we got to chill out for a long time. We got to hang out at this nice creek! Eh, but every now and then you could smell sewage, yuck. I enjoyed that part. Not the sweage part! The chillin' out part with meh friends. You sicko...thinkin' sick things!

The bus ride home was the least enjoyable part. I really didn't like it. At one point i got really irritable. People are really stupid sometimes. Everybody was yellin' and acting stupid. And a bunch of people around me decided to play truth or dare. 'cept without the truth. So it was more like dare or dare, dod. There's tot and dod. Dod is for retards who like seein' body parts and lickin' the floor. Tot is....for me and ari? I dunno. Anyways, at one point they got this guy to kiss meh, i jabbed him in the stomach. I must've hit him hard, he got on the floor and started coughin'. He's my buddy too, he shouldn't have kissed me! Then later they dared this girl to lick me...but she asked me if it was alright first. I was like, "sure! go for it!" Haha, i'm just kidding! I told her i'd get very pissed if they included me in it anymore, so she decided not to. I wouldn't have hit her or anything...but i would've been angry. Anyways, i eventually just layed back and listened to music in peace. The bus ride went by faster when i started thinking about ari. I wanted to hold her and sleep beside her. I wish i were in her band or vice versa. The band does so many things together, so it would mean i get to hang out with her a lot. Oh well.

Life is ever changing. I'm reminded of that constantly. I appreciate my dad's efforts to get me ready for college. I really do, although i'm not sure if he knows it. I pretty much blow off most of the stuff he tells me to do, it makes me feel bad. I'm just lazy or something i guess. Thinking about college kinda makes me think i have no chance of getting into a good one, and that kind of depresses me. I'm pretty much in the dark here, and some of my friends are going off visiting colleges, some have already chosen where they want to go, everybody's always askin' me where i want to go....and i never have an answer for them. They ask me what i want to do and what i'm interested in, and yet again i have no definite answer. ::sigh:: but i suppose i'll figure things out eventually. And i'll grow to accept my choice, my life choice. And i'll move on, from high school to college to life. I'm willing to go through those steps, i'm just not willing to take those steps to get there. I don't mind settling on the step, it's actually lifting my leg up to the step that i dread. But don't worry, i'm not too stressed.

Band is another stressor in my life. It's very time consuming. But it's worth it...i hope.

Next week is fall break, i have the whole week off. I wish Ari had it off too...that would've been so great....oh well. I'm gonna have time to get some stuff done, hopefully i won't lose my legs and decide to plant myself infront of my tv. I've got stuff to do! And i must do stuff! Luckily though, i will get to talk to Ari more, i don't have to worry about those practices on tuesday and thursday, plus since she's on a different time zone than me i get an extra hour with her! Yay!

Well, i think i wrote enough. Talk to you guys later.

::hug:: I love you Ari.
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Friday, September 23, 2005

Bleh
Well, it's stormin' in Ohio, i'm a little worried about Ari since she just logged off without saying goodbye. I'm guessin' the power went out. >.< I looked at the weather and it looks pretty bad. I really hope she's ok.

Ari, if you're reading this, please leave me a message. I'm going to check tomorrow morning, so leave me one if you're reading this in the morning.

::hug:: I love you Ari.

Later.
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Thursday, September 22, 2005

Kill the internet guy
Dang internet. Yesterday (wednesday) the internet starting messing up a lot while i was talkin' to ari. It was very very frustrating. >.< And ari was gone for most of the day, so the one little part i had to talk to her was the part where the internet starting messing up! Agh, it totally sucked. And now it seems alright, right when she left...CONSPIRACY!!!

I just got done talking to Ari...and i already miss her. While she was gone today i was watching the cowboy bebop movie. At the end Vincent died, and Electra was all sad for him. It was really sad, he couldn't be with is love. It made me think of Ari. Heh, hopefully i won't ever lose my memory to military testing and then conspire to destroy the world....hehe.

Ahhhhhh, i love her so much. Sometimes i feel like the word "love" isn't enough to fully convey how i feel for her. Heh, but i suppose it is. Love is a very strong word. Heh, i remember how long it took me to finally say it to her for the first time. I'm so glad i finally got it out, who knows what would've happened if i just ignored the feelings i had.

Well, today i've got band practice. Meh, then friday i've got a football game. But luckily i haven't got anything this saturday....unfortunately i think Ari does. Oh well. Our schedules conspire against each other!!!! CONSPIRACY!!

I've got stuff to do, i'm going to the math contest on the 26th and won't be back till the 27th...of october. And i'm also gonna be going to college things with my dad, like college and career fairs, along those lines. Damn my busy schedule.

If i had a car, i'd be afraid i'd just leave one day.

Have you guys ever seen those Ipex commercials? At the end it always asks me if i ipex....WHAT ARE THEY IMPLYING?!?! I don't have man boobs! I don't need the support! >.< Haha, jk you guys.

::hug:: i love you ari.

Later.
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Sunday, September 18, 2005

And on the seventh day we rest
All week i've been busy with school and band. Even Saturday. And now i finally get a chance to lay back and relax. Give my feet a break....and my mind. So what will i be doing today you might ask? Well, i'll tell ya. And if you didn't ask, then you're gonna find out anyways, so XP

I'm going to eat some pretty sweet food my parents are gonna make. Then i'm going to talk to Ari all day, hehe. I might get some playin' time in too (guitar). Haha, and that's about it!

I might get a chance to see Ari in November. That'll be pretty awesome. She says her mom has a friend in Nashville and that it'd be alright if she saw me for a couple of hours. I hope it works out. Even though i really want to see her, i know i'll still be nervous. I'll probably be spazzin', and i don't spaz! >.< Hehe, but i can get over it. I wonder what we'll do.

I love you Ari.

Later.
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Saturday, September 17, 2005

Daydreaming in my perfect dream
Band is like a vaccuum, it sucks up your life for a semester. It sucks up my time. And my time is precious, because i can use my time to do useful things. Like look at colleges, do homework (pfft, i rarely get homework), or my most favorite way to spend my spare time, talk to Ari! ^_^

I've got mini camp today (saturday) from 8-8cst. Urgh, 12 whole hours of band camp. Well, 10 really, we've got two hours for break, one is for lunch the other is for dinner. It totally sucks. I just hope i'll get to talk to Ari when i get back. ::pokes ari:: If you're reading this be on around 8:15 cst 0_0 But it's ok if you don't make it.

Band is actually pretty fun sometimes. I've gotten to the point where i'm really comfortable with the people in band. I guess it's because i'm a senior. But i feel like i can talk to a lot of people and enjoy myself. So it's cool. I know when i was a freshman and sophomore i had josh to hang with, he's one of my good friends. Last year was like the year i had to figure things out without him, he quit. It wasn't too hard. And this year is like the year where i'm really just comfortable in band. Too bad band still sucks. Hehe.

The kitty writes a lot of poems now on her site. I really like 'em. Some of 'em are a bit sappy. Sappy rulz by the way. But since i can't write poems i'll just have to stick with just writing a sappy paragraph. And thus the paragraph begins!

I daydream about being with her. We daydream about it together. It's such a nice thought, it makes it seem closer to reality, just talking about it. One of us could join the others band, then we'd actually enjoy band! I could sit with her on the bus, we could talk. Hehe, she seems to like to sleep on the bus too. She can fall asleep in my arms. We could hang out during the football game and mock the football team. Hahaha! They suck so bad! Heh, if she joined my band we'd be making fun of our football team. At this point in my life, if i had one wish, i would have to be selfish...i would wish for us to be together. Sometimes it's not enough to only be able to talk to her...but i have to be patient and hopeful that one day my dream can come true.

::hug:: I love you Ari.

Later everyone.
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Tuesday, September 13, 2005

The worst part of a hug
The worst part of a hug...is letting go. Sometimes i just wanna hold on forever. Because if i let go, who knows when i'll get another one...it could be 5 minutes, 5 hours, or 5 days....or it may be the last one, but i won't accept that. Especially not with her.

This week is homecoming week at our school. I miss 2nd period like every day this week, and that period happens to be band. So my band instructor decided we had to make up for it with an extra long pracitce today after school. It won't be over till about 8cst. So i won't be back home till 8:15-8:30ish cst. >.< The hardest part is not being able to talk to the kitty. But at least i have something to look forward to this afternoon. I just now got done talking to her, and i already miss her.

Sometimes i wonder if band is really worth it...

My dad's been pushing me into researching for college a lot lately. I don't like to, it just reminds me that i have to grow up. I want to be grown up, i just don't wanna grow up. I wonder what will happen to me. I wonder what will happen to us.

I love you so much, Ari. It's still a bit strange to me how i could have someone so important to me in my life. I always wonder how you're doing, hoping that you're happy...like i am right now. Life is too short for us to be unhappy. I'll do my best to keep you happy as long as i can.

::yawn:: I'm a little tired. I was going to get a little more sleep after Ari left this morning, but i decided not to. I'd just wake up even more tired and i'd have to rush all around the place to make sure i get ready in time. I don't like doing that. I never get to eat breakfast or anything. I'm always rushing in the mornings. Hehe, i kinda wish i still rode the bus sometimes though, cuz i could sleep in it in the mornings. Bleh, but it would still be too bumpy to get any real sleep.

I really don't like my first period class, Wellness. It's gay, and i don't like the people in my class that much. Some of 'em are alright, but a couple of 'em are just fucking retards. I heard somebody yell out yesterday "Who thinks we should kill all gays!?" ...I'm just like...what the fuck? It was totally out of the blue! And of course there's always the idiots that wanna fight each other and keep causing trouble. <_< Losers...

Ok, i think i wrote enough for now. I'm gonna go....do something.

::hugs the kitty:: I love you Ari.
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Wednesday, September 7, 2005

White Ninja takes his lunch to school

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Monday, September 5, 2005

Awww

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