Monday, March 14, 2005

   b^-^d
skiing was awesome and no i dont make it a habit to cut school alright! but yea it was fun we went down the black diamonds a lot and i like soard down a few of them all in all pretty sweet. i wont be able to visit all of u today seeing as i have to read for english gotta start my book The Plot Against America sounds good but its long i also have to find out wut i missed in school. o and here is the quote from "A Woman Of No Importance"

"Hearts live by being wounded. Pleasure may turn a heart to stone, riches may make it callous, but sorrow--oh, sorrow, cannot break it."

"A kiss may ruin a human life, George Harford, I know that. I know that too well."

"Don't be deceived, George. Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely if ever do they forgive them."

okay so that was actually 3 but wut can i say it just has such great quotes!
well hopefully i'll be on later if not
peace. out.
~Serenity
p.s. 97 gb signings b^-^d
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   hookie
i might not have time to make a full post today cuz im cutting school to go skiing *does dance* but i do want to say i read the play "A Woman of No Importance" and it was really good i mean it started sorta slow but once it got going it really liked it and it had some great quotes one of which i would like to post for u later b^-^d (officially obsessed with that smiley) well i'll see u cool catz later jk jk later ppl
peace. out.
~Serenity
p.s. Forbidden Kitsune i no i no its still one sentence but as elvesatemyramen would say "Feh" jk jk lol
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Sunday, March 13, 2005

   feelin better than i have in a while
okay my friend booger (its a nickname ppl) had his barmitzvah yestrday and it was just so aweful cuz rini and i missed the ceremony we were so late cuz we were trying so hard to get there but didnt make it T_T i felt so bad but then i went home and we went to an old family friends house and they are so funny so that was cool then i rushed home got to the barmitzvah reception and it was kick ass im not gonna say all of it but a dude almost squished my poor cell fone and then was being all annoying to rini about her crawling under his feet to get it and almost tripping him and also one of the like supervisers i guess u would call them like acidentally bumped his butt into poor rini i was like on the floor w/ laughter! and we found out who all the seventh grade pimps were but our friend booger is definately the biggest pimp to quote rini "i will never forget him standing on stage w/ all his glow sticks and bling and girls looking all ghetto fabulous" hehe yea and i got a pair of boxer shorts out of im wearing them right now b^-^d (sry luv that smily) also me and jungwoo are starting a club called "rebel's alliance" its for ppl who obsessively start revolutions there will be contests and stuff but we need members so join!!!
peace. out.
~Serenity
p.s. could u guys tell me if u wanna see more of my writing cuz i have more i could post and also im so happy cuz me and my friends are finally talking things out!

p.s.s. okay if im making u a banner comment reminding me! cuz im making so many its great! but i cant remember whos i finished and who still needs one!

p.s.s.s. i just realized how many typos there were....had to go over it again probably still missed some -_-"
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Saturday, March 12, 2005

   92! WOOT!!!
yea 92 gb signings so close so help pleaz!! im trying so hard!! ahh!! its overwhelming!! jk lol lol well this is a stupid post now go read my story in all its typo glory!
peace. out.
~Serenity
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do u guys want my story...well no choice here it is! hope u like it its not that great tho...

Footsteps
She leaned against the wall of the local C.V.S. with her arms folded across her chest with her eyes closed listening to the cars whizzing by in the street just beyond the parking lot. Her dirty blonde hair was down and it blew across her face and its long tendrils reached out into the wind. As she heard the automatic door open she smiled and said, “It’s about time Liza.”
“What can I say Kaja, I wasn’t looking forward to coming back outside. It’s so friggin’ cold!” Liza replied pulling out a pack of cigarettes and smoothly slipping one out.
“No shit. Maybe it wouldn’t be so cold if u were wearing gloves or even a long sleeve shirt under your jacket.”
“Shut up.” Liza said lighting the cigarette with a smile on her face. The family resemblance was noticeable. Even though Liza’s hair was lighter and her big eyes were bluer than the blue green of Kaja’s everyone said they looked just a like. “Let’s start walking it’s not getting any warmer.” Kaja easily fell instep beside her older sister. They were two years apart with Kaja at fifteen and Liza at seventeen. Walking seemed the only time that they were side by side. Kaja always felt one step behind her beautiful older sister. Most took Kaja as the smarter one but in truth Liza was very intelligent herself she just had a different kind of smarts that no one but Kaja noticed. Kaja could always see in her mind being compared to Liza; standing back to back, Liza only coming up to her shoulder she still felt threatened. Competition was fierce between them and it all came down to their need to feel appreciated.
“Do you have five bucks I could borrow,” Liza said taking another drag on her cigarette and blowing the smoke out in a relaxed breath.
“What for?” Kaja asked fearing that she knew the answer.
“Another pack,” said Liza brandishing the cigarette.
“Liza you know I made a promise a while back never to help you kill yourself.”
“Oh chill out one more pack won’t kill me.”
“Yeah but one more is ten times more than you need. Why don’t you just quit already? I’ll help you and then you won’t have to worry about Mom and Dad finding out.”
“It’s my own life and I’ll do what I damn well please miss know-it-all,” she replied looking straight ahead and getting irritated.
“You know I don’t mean it that way.”
“Yeah well it came off that way. You always do this you act like you know more about me than I do. God, all these people telling you you’re smart must be going to your head if you think you can boss me around.”
“I don’t think that way!” Kaja shouted the red of anger flushing her face. Liza always touched a nerve with that insinuation.
“Stop trying to be modest no one is buying it!” Liza replied. Here it was the old competition rising up from the deep to build the wall in their relationship just a little higher. Liza took one more long drag before throwing the cigarette down and grinding it into the pavement. “Lets just get home already,” she said cutting off Kaja’s protest. They cut across the snow in a yard near their house.
“I don’t think that way Liza and you know it,” Kaja said looking down at her feet now that she had calmed herself. She was carefully stepping in the footprints Liza had left. She didn’t have to pave her own path with Liza in front of her. The sun gleamed in her eyes and she concentrated harder on the ground. The long dark shadow of Liza had fallen over her and the breeze blew the branches of trees into her face before she had a chance to push them away. She squinted her already small eyes at the ground as if looking into the snow and Liza’s footsteps would give her the answers she was searching for. The fights she had with Liza ran deeper than they seemed. After each a kind of tension settled into there relationship. Kaja always felt subtle currents running through their fights. She remembered the first time she had seen her sister get drunk. She was twelve and Liza was fourteen. They were at their aunt’s house and her older cousin got Liza a drink. Kaja had watched in horror as her sister drank herself into oblivion. When her aunt came down they managed to hide the fact that Liza had been drinking but from then on Kaja had made a pact with herself. She refused to treat herself the way she saw Liza treat herself. By the end of that night Kaja was half carrying Liza to the bathroom and begging her to come to bed. She would not allow herself to hear her cousin offer her a drink. He wanted to know why she thought it was so bad. She stayed calm bringing up how Liza was underage. Her head had been pounding and was screaming at her to yell “She shouldn’t drink because you just robbed me of my role model! You took away my naïve outlook on the world around me and opened my eyes to drugs and abuse!” She supposed she should be thankful that had helped her make her resolution but she would never truly forgive him for taking away the security she had with Liza. The rift that had been created that night had never truly mended. Kaja had taken the role of trying to protect Liza but Liza refused any type of help fearing to seem weak in her little sister’s eyes. The day after that however she did depend on Kaja to help her through the hangover and save her from their parent’s wrath. The competition was still there and with Kaja trying to be protective Liza just withdrew from her more.
“Yea you do. You think your so great but all you are is a follower. Just wait you’ll be the same.”
Kaja froze for a moment. A beat pulsated in an echo through her body. A memory, a fleeting thought. This is you in two years. That had been her cousin’s promise that night. She had avoided it so far but how long could she hold out. Her hair seemed to swing in slow motion across her face. “Never say that to me again,” she said firmly and coldly.
“Oh don’t be such a drama queen. So what you end up like me is that really your worst fear. God, you really do think you’re damn perfect. Newsflash the world isn’t solid its shattered glass and you can’t go all your life without cutting you foot,” Liza said with disgust and an air of knowing.
“No Liza I don’t fear cutting my foot on the glass I fear seeing my reflection in that shattered glass.”
“Accept it you’re my sister. Move on from it.”
“Liza I will never be you and I never want to be you. Because behind all that makeup and behind all the cigarettes and curses your just a scared kid. You want to hide it. Do you think it’s weakness well it is,” she turned a stare of ice on Liza. “Is it that bad to think that you’re my sister. Why don’t you take off the mask the fresh air is fine.”
It was Liza’s turn to freeze and to feel the same pulse. It broke something in her but it did not set her free only she could do that. She recovered far more quickly her hand shot out and slapped Kaja. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about now get away from me.” Liza kept on the path she had started on leaving her trace in the snow, but Kaja pulled away. When her older sister was far from her Kaja turned around. She saw the two footprints in the snow and she saw were they parted headed in opposite directions.

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Friday, March 11, 2005

   happy yet sad and slightly disturbed
okay so im happy cuz ambi was over and she always makes m feel better and then im happy cuz i went to the dance and rini was their and other ppl that make me happy were there...im disturbed cuz well while i was there this short kid who i used to hate and used to have a huge crush on me like sed i was hot and i was wearing this real cool shirt but he sed "it would be easy to pull ur shirt down" T_T invading the space bubble!!! *hisses* stay away!! and he asked me out again and i sed no again -_-" it was...disturbing...and im sad cuz i read a friends post and it made me really upset cuz i actually showed my emtions in sciece and my teacher wanted to no wut happened but i didnt quite tell him cuz i had to get to social and i didnt wanna cry and if i talked about it i would and now my friend posts about me showing my emotions and i usually dont and she is guilty of it to sometimes cuz sometimes u just cant help it but i thought that was hypocritical but w/e i will get slammed for posting this but dammit i need a shoulder to cry on but i feel like such a burden *bows* im sorry i shouldnt do this anymore
peace. out.
~Serenity (V.K.)
ps must give emma her due credit she has helped me so much and been there for me to cry to
peace. out.
~Serenity
ps ummm yesterdays post explains my mood lately so check that out to if u wanna and pleaz pm if im making u a banner and remind me cuz i made so many i forgot ^-^"
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Thursday, March 10, 2005

dont wanna bring u down with my problems but no one understands and they arent trying to
its like someone is stabbing me...they asked me to bring my problems w/ them to them not to post it i did and it left me more hurt than b4 i wanna vomit "et tu" right...et tu...twist the knife...i brought it to them and now they just dont talk to me im just here moving like a ghost scrambling to get my hw done b4 my teachers realize that i didnt do it at home i just float thro the day adapting finding ways to avoid the sharp edge that hits me throwing every part of me into one thing so i wont notice the pain i shouldnt make ppl sit and read these posts its not fair...i feel like such a bad depressed person i dont wanna be depressed anymore i want more than anything to be happy just for an entire week...i should have just left it but i couldnt leave it at that i didnt wanna just be there friends again i wanted to talk thro everything and fix it but they just didnt no wut to do so i worked my ass off and got on good terms then realized "fuck what does good terms mean if im still torn up inside and nothings changed..."
peace. out.
~Serenity (V.K.)
ps still headed toward 100 gb signings tho at this rate no one will want to visit my site....do u like the new song i feel very connected 2 it right now...
i also wanna thank rini tsuki and ambi u guys keep me alive
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Wednesday, March 9, 2005

new and improved banner
i dunno if i told u guys that im a member of the peach girl fanclub just pm xanth591 to join well here is the new and readable...hopefully....banner for forbdden kitsune




banner for takara sohma u must go to her site and wish her a happy bday!!


o and here is the one i made for karakodashi on 100 gb signings


Comments (6) | Permalink

   jee my moods change pretty easily
meh....thats basically my day...meh....im kinda sad not feeling so great inwardly...grandmothers here making dinner...raven i have been making attempts to put up the the poster u made me but it just keeps freezing so if u could send me the code i would put up cuz its so cute u ppl really must see it anyway if i am making u a banner be sure i am working on it just really busy i have been ddring trying to forget what waits for me at school tomorrow...which would be friends...
peace. out.
~Serenity (V.K.)
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Tuesday, March 8, 2005

   ^_^
i cant post right now to much 2 do! i was gone for the day came back and had 8 PM's i felt so loved! well i won a contest on silverdaydreamer's site and these r my prizes they are way coolio right!




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