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• A few published poems
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myOtaku.com: WhispersToScreams


Tuesday, April 11, 2006

   The Worst Person Alive -points to self-
I hate me. I really do. I am scum. That one person that I love sooo much comes up to me and hands me a note. I ask if they're okay, they really look upset. They shake their head and walk off and I shrug and go on to class. Said person and I recently broke up, well, said person actually just started dating someone else without even telling me... Anyhow, I know they're sorry, they've apologized and cried for it quite a bit. I take the note in and read it. After reading it i'm in tears. Said person says how since all this shit went down they already couldn't sleep but now they can't eat either because of the depression all this shit caused. Apparently I was subconsciously blowing the person off and it really hurt them. And at the dance after Derrick tried to kiss me said person pulled me aside and was like, why didn't you kiss him. I just looked back and was like, I'm a bad kisser remember, cause it seemed to me after we kissed for the first time they left me. And they were like, no it wasn't your fault, it was mine, i'm fucked up and didn't want to fuck you up too, and I just looked at them and was like, Well you know what you really did fuck me up and it hurt. and I said some other things i don't remember but i guess they were really mean. In a later note said person said they just wanted to go home and cry because of it. And I feel SO BAD! Said person is treated like shit by everybody and I'd always be comforting and be like, man, I hope I never cause you pain like everyone else does. And then it ends up I've caused this person more pain than anyone else. I never wanted to hurt this person. I really love this person. With all of my heart.
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