Saturday, November 7, 2009

^___^
So. I'm in Romney, West Virginia, in my Aunt Linda's mountain cabin, and it is amazing. I love it. Love it, love it, love it! =D Fr Srs.
It's been a while since I've been this happy. This peaceful. I was actually like this yesterday too. Went practically everywhere with Margret. Even got new shoes and arm/leg warmerers at Goodwill. Her and I, we were glowing. Absolutely giddy with joy.

16. What's the most dangerous thing you've done?

Walk from my house all the way to Whitemarsh, which is about a 5 mile walk.

17. What anime would you want to be in?

High School Debut. Everything seems so easy and there's always something to make me smile.

18. What are of the things you've went as for Halloween?

Ghost pirate, Rock Star, a nun, Cherokee tribe princess... Yeah, it's a pretty wide variety.

19. Would you change anything about yourself?

Yeah... I'd like to be more confident and more positive. (And less bitchy, but that's a bit of a stretch for me. lol)

20. How would you describe yourself in 3 words?

Falling asleep again. -.- (This is a very comfy chair...)

21. What's the worst injury you ever had?

Prolly the bruise I got from when the sandman suckerpunched me in the eye last night. I so sleepy...

22. What're 3 things you want to do before you die?

-Have sex in the Virgin Islands because I can't resist the irony.
-Feel beuatiful and actually be proven right for once.
-Meet all my best friends on here in real life.

23. Where would you want to go for a vacation?

Here!

24. Have you ever broken any bones?
Yessir. My wrist bone when I was 7 or 8.
lol That doesn't even compare to what most of you have gone through. I'm such a pansy.XD

25.What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you of your father, mother, and siblings?
Father=Accidentally estranged.
Mother=Amazing.
Robert=Laughter
Charlie=Headaches and bad luck.
Katie=^.^->;~; (in other words, bipolar.)
Emma==Monkey. lol
Valerie=Diva (A FEMALE VERSION OF A HUSTLA!)

26. What's your biggest what if?
What if it really did rain lemon drops and gumdrops...? Well, actually it's a tie between thst and "what if I had stayed with my ex?"

27.Most interesting planet?
Earth. THe other ones seem kinda dead.

28. What's your favorite day of the week?
Friday because it means I survived another week.

29. if a movie/anime were based on your life, who would you be?

If anime: Kyoko Mogami from Skip! Beat because she is me in anime form. Srsly. I'm pretty sure the mangaka who created the series followed me around for years in order to create Kyoko because it is absolutely eerie how much me and her are alike.

30. I you could open your own business what would it be?
THE MAFIA!! lol No, j/k that's just my Italian blood speaking. I SO wanna be the Godmother. Anyway, it would probably be something really boring like a company that does the artwork for things like album covers and stuff.

31. What's your favorite movie?
It's a tie between The Butterfly Effect and Moulin Rouge.

32. Would you ever want to have a family of your own?

HEEL YEAH!! I WANNA MAKE, er, RAISE SOME BABIES!!! (Ignore that horny kid with the mricrophone behind the curtain!)

33. What's your favorite element?
Dood... You got me thinking of pokemon...-.-
lol I feel too drunk to answer that question, I'm about to go back to bed in a minute.

34. Who's your favorite anime/movie/TV show character?
Kyoko Mogami.

35.How do you think you'll die?

Murder. xD Dannyko's probably gonna get so annoyed with me one day, he'll just run me over. Just watch.

Annnnnnnnnd I'm feeling too tired to add questions or tag anyone right now, So I'ma have to wait til tomorrow.
Night night.
~belinda

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Friday, November 6, 2009

You know what? Fuck the world. This is the only place there is any love or justice or loyalty anymore.

That said, I'ma go get some donuts.
ily
~Belinda
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Thursday, November 5, 2009

hgrhjgythfyugugufuigififjdogigyit7rifjhgif

; ;
, ,
, ,
, ,
, ,
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That about sums up my mood right now.
I am knocked out on the floor,
With my cotton head and my paper heart.
Alone in this head, house, and bed never meant so much.
I'm falling apart.
F
a
l
l
i
n
g
A P A R T.

About 10 minutes left in 6th period. Just 45 minutes or so and I get to go home.
Got so much work to do over the weekend it's not even funny.'-__-
Oy. I don't really have anything to say, but my hands can't take leaving the keyboard so you'll just have to deal with my ramblings for now.
Sorry.
_ __
// //
~ ~
___

I have a mustache. =D ladedadeda

lalalalalovvvvvvve you all!

I wanna read Skip! Beat so bad right now. Good manga, crucifixes, and laughter seem to be the only thing that can soothe my pain. Fr Srs.

ily
~Belinda
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Wednesday, November 4, 2009

If you want the truth, I'm exhausted.
That's pretty much all there is to it. I could just about fall on my face onto the floor right about now. My head won't stop swimming. I thinks it's trying to dron itself.

Anyway, the English project... We have to make a chapbook, which is basically a self-published tiny book of poetry with a unifying theme. My chapbook is basically a restraining order. Thats why all the poems are called testimonies.
I finally got it done yesterday. Took me about 6 hours. *not even kidding*
Ugh... I'm so dizzy.


You make my heart soar, you make my heart sore.
Look at me once more.
Give us a smile.
I don’t feel quite naïve enough to be glad to get out of bed yet.
You make me feel so young after centuries of growing up too fast.
Put your hand in mine and make me forget every crash and burn that forced me to learn.
“I don’t wanna know. I don’t wanna go.”

Make some room in that cradle and let me lay down next to you.
You have so much to learn and I have so much to forget.
Open up, baby.
You’re my window to the past, my way out.
There’s probably a better approach to this,
But I’ll take escapism over maturity any day.

ily
~Belinda
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Sunday, November 1, 2009

Things I did to keep from breaking down yesterday:

-Watched "I Know What You Did Last Summer."

-Chopped my hair off

-Nearly froze to death in a grocery store.

-Piled 10 pounds of white face-paint on so as to look more "ghostly."(I was a ghost pirate for Halloween.)

-trick-or-treated for about half an hour in the freezing rain. (Well, actually that was more because the kids I was supervising wanted to keep going.)

-Played Sims for about 3 hours.

-Ate some Reese's Cups. (Which I'm not supposed to have because it's chocolate and chocolate makes me break out in rashes, but oh well.)

And now, due to some combination of these events, this morning I awoke sick as my little sister's addiction to the smell of my mother's armpits.
Yeah.It was pretty bad.
And I'm really tired but at the same time I can't sleep. You ever been in that situation? It's not fun.

Testimony One

Well, burn me to a crisp and knock me out!
Your Honor, it's not possible.
The boy must be delusional.
In more than half the instances he claimed she was stalking him, she was with me.
Honest to God, she's one of my best friends, we're practically joined at the hip,
And there's no way she could've done this without me knowing.
I don't doubt she liked him, but so what?
Love is love, be it reciprocated or neglected,
And either way, it's not a crime.

-Lindsay Kesling, the defendant's companion

Testimony Two/Prosecutor's statement

I don't care what her friends say, she's insane.
Matter of fact, I don't even think they're her friends.
The little psycho must be bribing them,
There's no way anyone as repulsive as her cold attain such loyalty.
It was three whole years ago but I remember the events like they had occurred a mere half hour previous to now.
After all, the only thing that's changed is that she's gotten more discreet.
All the dirty looks, the Cheshire smiles,
The "anonymous" letters--
She wrote "You'll never like me back, and for that, you deserve to die."
And the notes didn't just stop at the contents of my mailbox.
Ghosting into my jacket pocket,
Into my backpack,
Into my locker--
Drowning me in a sea of harassment.
Your Honor, you don't have to put the crazy bitch away.
But unless you want another murder on your conscience, you better keep her the hell away from me.

-Daniel Lee Bennett, alleged victim of the defendent's stalking

Testimony 3

Oh, please.
This is ridiculous.
The 2 years I've had her in my class, she was an honor roll student with an insatiable ambition and a halo super-glued to her head.
Your Honor, do you honestly think such a girl could have the intentions much less the time to commit a crime this elaborate?
For every hour she spent watching him, she would've had to spend another 2 studying.
She would have had to been up half the night every week all these years.

Annnnnnnd that's all I got so far. It's for an English project. I'll explain it later. I'm too tired right now.
ily
~Belinda
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Friday, October 30, 2009

Yup. That's me. It's not a very good picture because you can't see my new hair. Here, let me find another one:

My hair's not usually that puffy, but yeah, at least you can see the colors.

In other news: It's Friday.
Thank you, God.
Here's a video.

I don't care that Ryan and Jwalk aren't in the band anymore.
Panic is still amazing.
ily
~Belinda
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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Fodder for masturbation, anyone?
A.K.A. OH EM GEE, GET INTO MY VAGINA NOW PLEASE!!!

Yup.
And this, my friends, is that same boy in about 10 years from now:


Moral of the pictures: physical beauty is temporary. Stop falling in love with pictures and faces.
(That's more for me then anybody else, btw.)
I'm feeling very dysfunctional at the moment. Not sure that's a bad thing though.lol
I figured out no one's gonna pick me up this time.
I'm not a child anymore--I mean, I'm still a kid, but I'm definitely not a child. I gotta learn to stop relying on everybody else.

My friend Sebby's starting a band. I told him if he ever needed lyrics or production funds, he should call me. It's weird. I would've thought the news would've made me all emo and sorry for myself because I'll never be in a band--I suck eggs at all things musical.
But, instead, it just made me really excited. ^_^
I hope things go well. I'm really looking forward to seeing how this all plays out.

And, now, for your entertainment, a series of the top 100 Adamgasms

ily
~Belinda
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Tuesday, October 27, 2009

*sigh* You guys remember back when I was innocent and harmless? Back when the worst of my worries was getting my homework done on time and worshiping a certain scene kid who lived about 100 miles away?
Because I just spent an hour pouring over my archives, and honestly,I miss being like that... all sweet and friendly. I mean, I was also insecure and self-destructive as hell, but I seemed like I used to be such a good friend...
Back then, I didn't really care how I looked--I just assumed I was invisible and accepted it. But now...
I don't know. It's like, I know people can see me, but they never seem content with what they see.
Like I'm never good enough or something. *sigh* It's okay. It's all gonna be okay.
If I don't tell myself that, I'll plunge head-first into despair, and no one wants that.

NOTE TO SELF
Your soul shined so brightly,
Why'd you cut it off?
You had all the praise and all the applause
You had all the rhythm and every last professional clause.
Oh, darling dear, what happened?

The stars used to be your dancefloor
Now you're battered and broken behind locked doors
Couldn't you have learned to love the girl in the mirror?
Did you really have to sacrifice everything about yourself you held dear?

~Belinda
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Tuesday, October 20, 2009

0 0
0

Don't give me ^that look.

Q , Q
0

No, really, it's not that bad.

''; ;
D

Okay, so maybe it is that bad, but that's no reason to start crying on me.
;,;
*
DON'T SUCK IN YOUR LIPS AT ME!!
^ ^
U
PUT THAT TONGUE BACK IN YOUR MOUTH, YOUNG MAN!!!
(I) (I)
_____
Hey. Hey, hey, hey. Wipe that scowl off your face.


Dammit. He's gone.
*sigh* Emoticons... Why don't they ever listen to me?
~Belinda
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Monday, October 19, 2009

HA!

It's one of those crazy nights where I'm willing to laugh at anything. In other words, I just chugged half a beer and am a bit buzzed now. (Sorry, mom. Sorry, God. Sorry, good and/or insane people of myotaku.)
But what you know? Whatthefuckever. I'm done feeling bad for the night, okay? I've felt like shit for the past I don't even know how many weeks anymore and I've more than earned this brief period of contentedness, no matter how temporary it is. So please. Just for one night, let it go. Okay? Okay.

Let me tell you about my day, guys.
I woke up at about 4:00 this morning and could not get back to sleep. Throughout my school day I was completely exhausted. When seventh period came around and my teacher began to lecture me about not completing an assignment while I was home sick, I began to get the all too familiar urge to pull a Glock out of my ass and turn myself into swiss cheese.
When I got home I discovered my grandmother had been bleeding internally and had had to go to the hospital with my mom. After a few hours of reassuring myself that she was going to be okay,--and, okay, a little bit of self-absorbed emo mooping that I'm going to be alone forever--my lovely Aunt Mary calls. Upon me informing her of the situation at hand, she begins musing that if my grandmother does die in the next 24 hours or so, there'd probably be a big funeral, what with my grandmother having 12 kids and all.
I know she doesn't mean it, but honest to God some days I just want to wrap my hands around my aunt's fat neck and squeeze until she stops breathing. The worst part is, I'm probably the most like her out of all the members of my family. I'll probably end up being exactly like her one day--a fat, single, delusional, insensitive, self-absorbed schizo in a mental institution.
Hell, I'm already self-absorbed and sinlge. Only 3 more adjectives to go, right?
~Belinda
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