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Tuesday, January 13, 2009


Something really weird happened today. Really, really, REALLY weird.

It all started this morning, when I woke up. My alarm didn't go off, so instead of waking up at 6 like I was supposed to, I woke up at 7. So my mom had to drive me to school, right? Meaning, I didn't get to see Dan on the bus, meaning I had no way of knowing at that point if he even came to school.
Okay, so about 2 hours later, right after second period, I go down this hall-way where me and Dan usually pass each other almost every day. He's not there.
A few hours after that, on my way to my 5th period class, I pass by the cafeteria where Dan should be coming exiting from lunch at that time, and again, he's not there.
So, at this point, I'm pretty sure Dan didn't come to school today because I haven't seen him once all day, which is highly unusual because even though we don't have any of the same classes, our paths intersect quite a lot throughout the day. Not to mention, he didn't even ride the bus home this afternoon.
Yet, when I got home, I ended up talking to my grandmom, and she said she didn't wake me up right away because at first she thought I didn't have school, but then she saw DAN MAKING HIS WAY TO THE BUS-STOP and... Well, it doesn't matter. The point is, Dan managed to go the entire school day without running into me once.
And, I know this is stupid and egotistical and crazy, but I can't help thinking that this means that he's been running into me ON PURPOSE and the only reason he didn't do it today was because he thought I wasn't there.
Yeah. Like I said: it's stupid. I know. I shouldn't even consider it, but...
*sigh* I just can't shake the feeling that it means something significant.
Maybe it's just denial. Maybe it's just that I want to believe he's had the option of not riding the bus home and taking alternate routes to his classes all along. Maybe it's just that I want to believe he chooses to see me every day instead.
Because I do. There's nothing more I want than for him to reciprocate with me on some level.

I love you all.
~Love, Belinda

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