myOtaku.com: X Shadowme X

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1993-05-02
Gender
• Female
Location
• Here
Member Since
• 2005-05-30
Occupation
• Life preserver :)
Real Name
• Belina

Personal

Achievements
• http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb281/Soul_Resistance/Untitled.jpg... Nuff said
Anime Fan Since
• Ever since Pokemon
Favorite Anime
• I'm not that obsessed anymore, to be honest. Mostly just Kare Kano, Ceres, Furuba, Ouran Highschool Hostclub, FMA, and, of course, ShinChan. X3
Goals
• Make it out of here in one piece
Hobbies
• Paranoia, mood swings, and the occasional emotional meltdown
Talents
• :)

myOtaku.com: X Shadowme X

Sunday, July 17, 2011

I feel very very vulnerable and fragile right now. You could break me with an eye-blink.

Regardless I came to tell you all that no matter what you've gone through, no matter the amount of abuse, neglect or shame you've experienced, and whether or not you've had the misfortune of having the Bible shoved down your throat--and I say misfortune not because the Bible is boring or unimportant but because having anything shoved down your throat is guaranteed to ruin it for you--you are accepted, wanted, and loved more than you could ever imagine and in a way that is completely unique to you.

There is a God and when He looks at the world He doesn't just see a giant, unruly, massive throng, He sees His children and He knows every one of them by name--knows him and her and me and you better than he or she or you or I know ourselves.

And yes, I have just come from Church but that is beside the point. XD
The point is, I want to change the world for the best.

Rules and dogmas can only change the world when coupled with love. I want the shame and the self-righteousness and the walls to come down. I want you all to feel your heart burning like mine is right now--please, no Peptobismal jokes. (OOH, PRODUCT PLACEMENT! SORRY, WORLD. >.<)

I'm in love with Jesus and I'm tired of hiding it.

ANYWAY. I decided to stop having near-sex(sex without penetration) with my boyfriend and I'm scared. For about a million different reasons.

For one thing I don't know if I can resist. I've failed and fallen so many times...

For another, I have trust issues. I'm scared if I stop putting out he'll eventually cheat on me or leave me.

Finally, worst of all, I'm scared I've been blinded by all the sexual energy and we don't have enough beyond that to make the relationship last.

This is definitely going to test me but I want to do this.
Please give me your support and pray for me.
ily
~Belinda
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