Monday, May 2, 2005

   Aiyah..
These last few days, I've been doing nothing but painting, as all of you can probably see thanks to my updates..

I have a new art program for my computer called 'artrage'. I downloaded it on Friday, thanks to WildeOne. She sent it to me via aim, and I haven't really been able to get off of it since.

At the moment, I'm in second period, and there are only EIGHT MORE DAYS LEFT!

Hah hah! Seniors rule! Only because we get out early.. If anything, half of my senior class are morons and deserve to stay for another year.. *shrug*

Anyway, I'm in absolute pain right now. I hate this time of the month, it makes me pissy.

So, I'll be uploading another piece as soon as I get home today. I'm in Keyboarding Applications at the moment, so.. n____n;;
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Friday, April 29, 2005

I've become so numb..
Right now, I'm at the point that I don't care anymore. No one gives a damn about me save a few of my friends here on the internet.

My real friends in life, they won't talk to me anymore.. And..

Oookay.. Some girl just came into the classroom crying out, 'The Viper is Coming!'.. I think they're all juniors, too.. It's kind of weird..

Eh, well, that got me out of that rut. I've got a new picture to upload as soon as I get home. It has to do with my theme, "The day my spirit died".
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Tuesday, April 26, 2005

   Cuz I'm broken..
Friday afternoon, at exactly 6:45 pm, I witnessed my now ex best friend's little sister get abused by there mother.

She launched herself at her, and tried to suffocate her. She then tried to dive after the other daughter, and when that didn't work, she came after me..

The problem is, this wasn't the first time she'd tried to hurt someone in the family.. She'd broken her son's ribs, abused her elder daughter, and her husband.. But.. No one believes me now.

We called the cops and everything, but SHE wanted to have a party, so, she lied. She lied to the cops because SHE wanted a party.. And now she'll never be able to stop her mother.. She lost her only chance to do something about it.. She told the cops that I lied to my mother, that my mother was some kind of Jehovah's witness and all this stuff..

To this DAY she still says I'm a liar.. Even though I've been traumatized for life because her mother tried coming after me.. She says that I made it all up because I didn't like her mother. I don't like her mother, because of what she did to everyone..

I don't know what to do.. I really don't. It's torn me up inside that I lost my best friend.. And now, I feel like there's no one else out there.. Period..

I've been trying my best to get it off of my mind, but, there's nothing I can really do anymore.. I'm just so tired now.. So tired and weary..

I can't draw that well right now, not anything that doesn't involve some huge amount of violence that I can put on here.. It's too bloody, even for me.. It's made me sick how you think you know a person, and then they go and do something like this..

I'm sorry for anyone that reads this and is depressed, but I tend to treat this like an actual journal. Gomen.

The good thing is, I've managed to find a cousin of mine through marriage. She's a really nice person, so, that's the only good thing that's happened to me the past few days.

I'll try and upload something asap.
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Friday, April 22, 2005

   Whoop whoop walla walla fwee fwee!
Oookay.. I'm really loopy today.

I've uploaded at least two pieces that are colored, and, if I might add, one of the best all time kissing scenes I've ever done.

Everyone keeps pm'ing me, telling me that they lik his ears. Heh, I like his ears, too! They're really low, large, and floppy! His name is Milo, so you guys know! He's just so cool.

Anyway, I reread some manga, one in which is dubbd 'Hands Off!', which is about this boy who has the ability to see the past. I won't get into it, considering the fact that I haven't read a lot of it yet, I only have one volume of it so far.

I do have one magna called Hyper Rune. I love it, I love anything that CLAMP makes, pretty much, save the one little thing of Miyuki-chan in Wonderland.. That was just strange, and, kind of weirdish hentai thing. Funny, though.

Hmm, what else is happening? Oh, I'm going to a friend's house tonight for a huge party. Yay! And we got progress reports! Boo - er - I mean Yay!

I brought up every single one of my grades, so my mom's being a bit more leneant on me when it comes to the whole 'no internet period for you' thing.. So, all will be well with the world soon!

Only fifteen (I think), more days until I graduate and no longer am a senior, but a freshman once more and in college! Wee!
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Thursday, April 21, 2005

   Smile.. Though your heart is breaking..
I've had that damned song in my head for five friggen hours now, and I want it out!

I left my backpack at school today.. U_U; I'm such a friggen' moron.. God.. I can't believe it, too! It was the first time. EVER.

I had some really good sketches, too! Oh well, guess I'll just have to wait and upload them..

Happy Belated Birthday to Snow Fox! One of the coolest artists EVAR! I hope she had plenty of stuff this year!

Only sixteen days left of school.. How cool is that! Being a senior rocks! I get to rub it into all the snot nosed little kiddies' faces that they still have, like, five more weeks! Bwahahaha!

Anyway, other than that, life rocks!
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Monday, April 18, 2005

   Blaaah. Another long one.
I'm soo tired lately.. I think it's because the school year's starting to wind down for me and my bud's..

Though, now that I think about it, it should be getting a lot harder, nyuh? *hits self* Okay, no more staying up till three in the morning watching Di Gi Charat.. I'm gonna kill Tai for letting me borrow that.. *sniffle*

Anyway, yeah, Saturday my buddy's little sister had an asthma attack, so she was staying over at my place for the night so she wouldn't be home alone.

We stayed up and watched Full Metal Alchemist, along with Inuyasha (which was hilarious, Poor Shippo! Kiroro was awesome, though!), and then anime unleashed which was showing R.O.D TV.

I think the same people who did I, My, Me: Strawberry Eggs, did that.. I loved that series, IM2, I mean.. I bawled at the end, I was so mad!

Anyway, it's about this guy who's fresh out of college who wants to be a gym teacher! Problem is, the only school around is a co-ed school.. That only hires female teachers!

So, what does he do? He storms in there, yelling about how it's not fair that men can't teach, and receives a lecture on how men are pigs and don't deserve to teach at that school!

And so, his landlady helps him by giving him all kinds of devices to turn him into a lady! And so, as a woman, he applies at the school, and becomes the new sensei..

I won't give away any more of the series, but it's so cute! I absolutely loved it, save the ending, and there's a bit of teacher student relations on it, too! Good looking guys, cruel girls, evil principals.. IT'S AMERICAN HIGH SCHOOL! AHH! Okay, minus the good looking guy part (Sorry, Tai, but you're not THAT good looking! XP)

Well, other than that, I found that Gate Keepers 21 isn't as bad as everyone cracks it up to be.. Not to mention it's got a good enough plot line and a lot of fighting in it, so it appeals to all audiences..

Yeesh, if I don't stop, I'll end up pushing my other posts off the page..

Oh, another rant about the little people that keep voting me down.

KNOCK IT OFF! I'M SO DAMNED SICK OF IT!

I know some people don't like it when I bust them for stealing other people's art, but, hell! Don't hold it against ME! YOU'RE the one that stole it! And I swear to GOD, if you don't leave me the hell alone, I'll find you! I'm tired of it! SICK AND TIRED OF IT!

I've worked HARD on ALL of my art, old AND new, and it's getting annoying how people decide that I'm not worth the effort to LEAVE THE HELL ALONE!

To those of you whom agree with my situation, please, comment on this or the previous post! I'm gonna get a petition for whomever steals a piece of artwork is automatically banned from myO. Or severely punished.. Or smacked.. Something!
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Saturday, April 16, 2005

   Grrr..
I don't know WHO it is, but, whomever keeps voting 'no' for spite on my artwork, is about to get their ass kicked.

I don't like it when people do that for no reason, and, if it's just to get my ranking down, it's about to stop, NOW. I don't like that kind of thing, and I've only been nice to people!

*sniffles* Are you people just MEAN or what!? At least my FRIENDS give a damn.

Darkened Abyssian: Good luck on uploading your work, your words have also really cheered me up a lot, seeing as you're the only one that gives a damn about me. *glomps*

And to all that have voted that they like my work, or have said they didn't and gave a LEGITIMENT answer to it, THANK YOU, atleast YOU guys aren't total pricks!

Oh, and a rant today.

ART THIEVES

Okay, people are art thieves, I know this from experience because my art's been taken and splurged all over the net in different intervuls by people who REALLY can't draw.

But when someone accuses ME of doing it, it really gets my skin to boil. I have NEVER stolen a piece of artwork and proclaimed it mine! If I have TAKEN a piece, I always told the artist what I was going to do to it, and added it as some kind of group work, temporarily lost the word for it..

Oh, and another thing, you little snots that don't like the fact your art sucks and I try and help you feel better about it, you're about to get your art work TORN APART.

I don't care WHO you are, or WHO your uncle is, I'll rip it to shreds and put you in a psychological COMA if you don't leave me the HELL alone! I hate you people that do that to me! It's just.. RUDE!

Okay, rant over now..

Anyway, I would like to see people comment and vote more, it's appreciated, you know, to see what you others like or don't like about it! But, please, don't just vote 'no' because you don't think I am a nice person or whatever.. When I get t'd off, I get T'D OFF..
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Friday, April 15, 2005

   Whaaa!

You want a sweet guy. Who'ld take you anywhere.
Like Japan!!! Wow I would like a guy like that
too:) Also he looks so cute in japanese
clothing:)


Who's Perfect For You??? (Cute Anime Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

In the past two days, I have updated over, like, ten pieces, maybe more. Feel free to look and comment.

School sucked today, but, atleast now I'll be allowed to upload more art since I have internet during the week again!

Yaaaaay! GTK, thanks for cheering me up so much, you're the best, you know that? *glomps*

Oh, and to Tien-Kun and dragonnova, you two totally rock for letting me use your artwork to base some of mine off of! I love you guys.. You're all.. -sniffle- Totally awesome.. *tackles* Wee! n____n

Not much here today, but I will upload more often now!

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Thursday, April 14, 2005

   No Expression for this Pain..
Broken

Hidden in a case of white
Shrouded by a darker burn
Never to come to see the light
Freedom, a concept, to never learn
Bound by the chains of reality
Locked by the paralyzing fear
Kindness only to the insanity
Of living a lie for another year

I’m broken and torn
Between fantasy and reality
I’m tired and worn
From facing lack of security
Of the world the past has made
Mistakes that form my future
My heart and mind start to cave
Trying to find what to search for

I hold the light and the darkness of my heart
Trembling I will embrace those shadows
Pain seering through of every kind
Drowning in the blood of the shallows
The blanket of lies has been lifted
My eyes have been opened to see the death
It’s no longer a secret for the gifted
I have now taken my last breath

My mind’s foundation’s cracked long ago
Leaving me a teetering ground to stand on
No longer certain of memories I know
No longer a person to lean on
Broken and alone, I’m deaf to the masses
I’m now blind to the facts of the truth
Lying to me, wearing rose tinted glasses
I’ve locked myself tight in an imaginary booth.

I hold the light and the darkness of my heart
Trembling I will embrace those shadows
Pain seering through of every kind
Drowning in the blood of the shallows
The blanket of lies has been lifted
My eyes have been opened to see the death
It’s no longer a secret for the gifted
I have now taken my last breath

Shattered into tiny pieces
My mind, now broken on the floor
Nothing left for me to believe in
It’s been shut, that once open door
Opportunity knocked and left me a message
To wake up and capture the signs
But I’ve been lied to, I didn’t trust it
I never really could read between the lines

I hold the light and the darkness of my heart
Trembling I will embrace those shadows
Pain seering through of every kind
Drowning in the blood of the shallows
The blanket of lies has been lifted
My eyes have been opened to see the death
It’s no longer a secret for the gifted
I have now taken my last breath


I don't really know what inspired me to write this.. I don't, really. But, I hope the best is yet to come, ya know..?

I really need to get back in the swing of life. I'm so obsessed with anime, it's not funny, most of the time..

I just finished reading all six volumes of Tokyo Mew Mew, and I plan on getting the seventh.. Somday.. Uh, it might be a while, considering the fact I have little to no money whatsoever. T_T

Anyway, life's been okay, I've returned to my obsession with cats, especially, considering the fact I've had the Meow-Mix commercial theme song stuck in my head for an official week now.

Scary. Anyway, I've met a lot of new people, and I think I'll name them all that keep in contact with me and are uber cool!

GTK: Totally awesome. We both are cat fanatics, well, atleast about the movie The Cat Returns.. So broke, though T_T WE NEED MONEY! *making picket signs*

dragonnova: Ohmigosh. Totally awesome art! She's the coolest person, too! She, and myself, are both fanatics over Link and The Legend of Zelda Series.. Gamecube.. +_+.. I need to get that back, actually..

Abbis: She's so stinking cool! She lets me color her artwork! You've got to check her out, she's the coolest!

Tien-Kun: So totally cool and amazingly sweet. Beautiful artwork and a loving person to boot! Be sure to leave comments, she loves those!

takaidoshie: She's not on that much, but she's still got some awesome art, and she does answer her pm's, which is more than I can say for SOME people..

Naru_Atshushi: Ohmigosh she's so sweet and nice! I absolutely lover her as a buddy! She has some really interesting art, and a lovely style!

Okay, that's all for now, since not a whole lot of people actually keep in contact with me JUST yet. n_n;

Hmm, well, I can't really say much has happened to me in the past few days, save I made my first batch of sushi the other day. We didn't have raw fish, so, we used that bagged salmon stuff that resembles tuna. Kinda interesting, kinda funny! n_n; My cat kept trying to bite my fingers all night afterwards..

And I got back my Cresent Moon manga! Yaaay! I LOVE CM! It's, like, the coolest manga evar! Yes, EVAR!
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Tuesday, April 12, 2005

A word to the wise.
http://www.myotaku.com/users/xxlinkinparkxx/

I'm not all that great with link adding, since I haven't done that much html in a long time, but, I think anyone who's felt like I have, would be wise to read this.

Okay, happy time! Happy time! *pulls out some cd's and starts putting on the Chobits Soundtrack for some happy music!*

I am such a fake when it comes to this. Hollow smiles and dead eyes, really, but, hey, life's been good for me I guess.

Mother dear has resorted to beating me half to death. Of course, it's not physically, she could get her ass in jail if that happened, it's just emotionally. Being ADD and clinically depressent, you'd think she'd realize that I take thing's personally.

I don't really care for the person sitting across from me either.. I wish I was Akito some times, from Fruits Basket, use some emotional psyche thing and crack him so bad he'd piss himself, but, alas, I can not pull off that look, though, I've got just about as many health problems..

ANYWAY, Tipton County (where I live) just got back from spring break. I got to go to Gulf Port, Mississippi.. Damn, I hate that word, so damned long! ;O;

Anyway, I got to go to the beach for the first time! Sure, it's a man made beach, but it's still awesome! I almost got stung by a jelly fish, and divebombed by about fifty seagulls on a shrimp boat.It was a tour, I couldn't help it.

Saturday we settled into our Aunt's house, and I had to deal with a twelve year old pain in the ass called Pud. His real name's Dalton, in case anyone wants to track him down and slit his throat, because I could care less, little rat.. No offense to Yuki, of course.

Yes, well, we rented out some games for the gamecube, and that's when all hell broke loose. He kept whining and complaining about wanting to play, and he took out more games than I did! It's not fair! All he did was sit in the room I WAS SLEEPING IN and try to get on the gamecube.. I won't get into it any more, because I'll start sounding like him.. U_U;;

Yeah, well, Sunday we went to my Aunt's church, then to this place called Homestead, or something like that, greasy little chicken wing buffet, really. Monday we went to NEW ORLEANS! YEAH! It was a three hour drive from her house, and we got lost four times, but, I got three new hats to add to my weird hat collection, AND two shirts. Yay! I got two plushies at the dollar tree, and some Mardi Gra beads with Dory and Nemo on it from Finding Nemo for a friend.

Tuesday we went to the mall and shopped a bit, Wednesday I stayed home and relaxed, Thursday I went to this aquarium!

OH. MY. GOD.

I was going insane! I love dolphins, so I'm always trying to get as many pictures as I can. We had to buy three disposable cameras because I kept taking so many pictures. Though, as we were leaving, I found I didn't like them so much anymore. The main tank was where I was standing, and there were about six dolphins in it, playing with some basketballs. I tossed one to a dolphin, and it threw it back. I tossed it again, and another dolphin came up with a different ball.

It must have been jealous or something, because I found out the HARD way that he wanted to play. He beaned me right in the face with a salt water covered ball. I almost fell into the tank.. I had a huge red mark on my face and salt water in my eye.

It was cool, other than that.. My eyes burned like a bitch, though, and I still have a nice sized bruise from it, but, other than that, all is well on my side of the planet.

I got home, went to a friend's house, rented a game and we watched the second Inuyasha movie. I don't remember the name, but, because of that, I'm on an Inuyasha craze right now. For some reason, he's got to be depressed, too.. Drew him crying in four different ways.. Interesting, eh?

Yeah, right. XP.

Full Metal Alchemist has just risen on my favorite list. My buddy's getting the entire series when it all comes out, and she's gonna burn me copies of every dvd she has that pertains to anime. She's so awesome, and she's only fourteen! Sweet! Kids CAN be cool! Yaaaaaaaay!

Anyway, how did YOUR spring break go? And if you didn't have one because you're in college or something, tell me how the last week went anyway!
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