Saturday, January 31, 2004

Sweet, But FICTIONAL
i saw this really sweet short story from this persons site, so i decide to share with u peoples, its really sad but fictional.

I have a boyfriend who grew up with me, his name is Jin, I always thought of him as a friend till last year, when we went to a trip from a club, I fell in love with him, Before that trip is over, I took a step and confessed my love for him, And soon, We became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways, I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there were so many other girls, To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe i was just another girl...
" Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?"I asked.
"I can't"
"Why? you need to study at home?"I felt dissapointment grabbing me.
"No...I am going to meet a friend..." He was always like that.
He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him , I was just another girlfriend. The word 'love' only came out from my mouth. Since i knew him, We never had any anniversories. He didn't say anything from the first say and it continued till 100days....200days....Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, with out a fall, I don't know why...one day....
Me:Um. Jin
Jin:What? just say..
Me:I love you
Jin:you...just take this doll and go
Thats how he ignored me and handed me the doll. Then he dissapeared. I recived dolls from him everyday. The one day came, my 15th year birthday. When i got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But time passed, soon the sky was dark..., No call. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me up. He told me to come out. I fely joy and I ran out happily
Me:Jin...
Jin:Here, take this....
He handed me a little doll
Me:What's this?
Jin:I didn't give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I'm going now, bye.
Me:Wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin:Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away.
Me:Tell me, tell me you love me....tell me
I clung to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.
"I don't want to say that i love someone so easily, if u wanna hear it, then find someone else"He ran off
He didn't want to say it easily....How could he....I felt that...maybe he's not the right guy for me...Next day, I stranded myself at home crying,just crying. He didn't call me, but i was waiting..He just continued handing me a little doll every morning. After a month, I got myself together and went to school. I saw him on the street with another girl. He had a smile on his face,one that he never showed me as he touched the doll.., I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls, and tears fell. Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls...suddenly the phone rang. It was him. He told me to come out to the bus stop. I tried to calm my self down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that i am going to forget him, that it's going to end. Then he came, holding a big doll.
Jin:Jo, I thought you were mad, you really came?
He was acting like nothing happend as he held out the doll as usual.
Me:I don't need it..
Jin: What? Why?
I grabbed the doll and threw it on the road.
I don't need this doll, i don't need it anymore!!i dont want to see a person like you again!"
but unlike other days, he was shaking
He apologized in a tiny voice
He then walked to the road to pick up the doll
Me:You're stupid!why are you picking up the doll? I just throw it away!
but he ignored me and just went to pick up the doll. Honk~Honk~A big truck was heading torwards him.
"Jin!Move!"I shouted
He didn't hear me, He squatted back to pick up the doll.
"Boom!"
That's how he left. How he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me. I had to through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him...And after two months of acting crazy, I toke out the dolls. I remembered the says i spend with him and started to count the days, when we still loved each other.
"1,2,3...."
That was how i started to cout the dolls....
"484,485..."
It ended with 485 dolls, I started to cry again, with a doll in my arms, I hugged it tightly, then....
"I love you~~,I love you~~"
I dropped the doll,shocked,I picked up the doll and pressed its stomach.
"I love you~~,I love you~~"
I pressed all the dolls'tummies
"I love you~~"
"I love you~~"
Those words came out repeatedly. Why didn'y i realize that he loves me this much....I toke out a doll under the bed and pressed it's stomach, It was the last doll, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice i missed so much came out.
"Jo..Do you know what today is?We've been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is?I couldn't say i love you...um...since i was too shy...if you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that i love you....everyday...till i die....,Jo...i love you...." I listend as tears ran down my cheek...

P.S sry for the spelling mistakes, i tried to type them all in proper english so it toke meh a long time lol
Comments (11) | Permalink