Sunday, May 27, 2007

I went to the hospital last night... I was there for 8 hours. 2 of which were spent in the waiting room, 6 of which were spent hooked up to an IV full of saline and a hospital gown on (but hey, it wasn't the kind with no ass, so I'm okay!). I was outside most of the time my parents were in the waiting room. I was crying on the phone to Hannah for two hours, because I was so terrified that my parents would find out how much I'd drank in the past week. She got me through it, and promised me whatever happened would be for the best. I was so scared, all I could think about was them finding out how much I betrayed their trust and took advantage of it. I didn't want the hospital to call me back there. They had to do tests that...were very embarassing... I really don't want to remember it. And I had to have a cat scan, so they made me drink about 40 oz of this absolutely repulsive orange liquid that was supposed to dye my insides or something so they would show up on the cat scan. It took me an hour to get it all down because I had to keep stopping for fear it was all coming back up =___= My parents had to leave the room for one precedure (I don't want to talk about it. I'm serious. Don't ask.) and so when they left, I told the doctor I had drank last weekend (which I had, so it wasn't entirely a lie) and I asked him if that would have caused internal bleeding. He said that alcohol can cause it, but I was bleeding too severely for it to be caused my just that. He didn't tell my parents. I am so grateful. I'm making Rachael and Megan and Scott promise they won't let me drink anymore. Not for a long time, anyway. The male nurse was a cuuuuuuuuuute Korean guy. I was mad. I had no makeup on, the mascara I had put on earlier was in tear streaks down my face, my hair hadnt been washed in two days, and I had no fucking underwear on underneath that gown (and I could tell it was plotting some way to move so I would flash the whole hospital.) He was sweet though, and he took me to my CAT scan and unhooked/rehooked up my IV, and talked me through it all. They didn't really tell us what it was... They really didn't. They just told us what it wasn't. We know now it's not a tumor and it's not something really serious that we're aware of. And it's not so much bleeding that I would be in danger of blood loss. But right now I'm pumped so full of saline and that nasty cat scan fluid that i feel sick as hell. I'm going to go lay down again, and I don't plan on going anywhere today except the damned shower. xXTOCXx

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