Sunday, October 29, 2006

Just wanna be loved!

Song= Papa Roach - To Be Loved Zappa: So, as it turns out, my 'creative writing' wasn't creative enough. Nobody wanted to play along, and... it was getting realy troublesome. So... Sadako: I'm back? *flops over shoulder* Zappa: Indeed, but why are you so tiny? Sadako: I'm laptop sized! Zappa: So, you're gonna perch on my shoulder like Yachiru or something? Sadako: Yup, got a problem? Zappa: No. Sadako: Then why are you complaining? Zappa: I'm not. Sadako: But, weren't you just... Zappa: Nope, you must be crazy. Sadako: But, you're the... Zappa: :P Sadako: You're silly Zappa. So, how are things with you and Ukyou? Zappa: Rockin' Sadako: PSI-Rockin'? Zappa: Indeed. Sadako: I'm glad you've found someone new. How long will this one last? Zappa: That's a very rude and inconsiderate thing to ask. Even if I guessed, it would either backfire, or upset someone, namely Ukyou herself. Sadako: I'm sorry, well, it's nice to be back regardless ||.^ ~Zappa

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Thursday, October 26, 2006

Wednesday, October 25, 2006 -12:28am Finished transcribing everything. Time for sleep and hopefully happy dreams. I wonderwhere all this Japanese come from. I'l hide it where onli I'd look. -5:15am I've lost a good deal of respect for Deus. She was there agian, at 5:30am, on the couch, doing only what could be implied. If she flares at me agian, < japanese footnote > Holy shit. It hapened agian. How did I do that? I can't readJapanese, so how did I write it?! I'm not sure if I'm pissed or depressed about the whole thing. I neeeeeeeeed someone. Soon. I just feel so left out of being... not even being single, I feel left out of not having someone to hold. -6:25am I have the Mai <3 Athena figures with me agian. I think it's the representation that Mai holds as Ukyou (or vise versa) that I have it with me. Makes me wish I had something smaller to keep on my person. Like a phone strap. But that's where Rider is. -8:18am Like a leech I hold on / Cuz if we belong to some / Cut off this dream, cast off / You'll see what's beneath / Now feel me (Chevelle - Closure) -11:30am Sita knows that I have intent to injure the girl give nthe oppurtunity arises. I've never actually WANTED to hurt someone before. This kind of worries me, but it feels justified too. I hope I won't actually HAVE to hurt someone. -12:13pm How's that icon go? "I love standing out in the rain, cuz no one can see me cry." Page 22 -1:43pm We're gonna party like it's nineteen-ninety-BOOM Fuckin time paradox... < Japanese footnote > -4:25pm Rant- WTF is with this Halloween paranoia? I want my holiday back!!! Happy- (cencored by request) Ask me personally, given you don't already know. -5:05pm Sita updates my MyO. I'ts Akiha with Chevelle v'v -6:35pm Ukyou asks for me to proofread her fanfic. Orders confirmed.

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Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Page 15-21

Page 15 Thrusday, October 19, 2006 I just realized I didn't transcribe last night. Deus had suddenly decided to eave Friday, which seriously upsets me, as I took today OFF to leave today. We WILL be eaving today. Page 16 -8:47pm Well FUCK Deus decided to side with Kaylyn and Andrew. I'm FUCKED out of Friday. I know we wouldn't show up till 5 pm or later, cuz I've been waiting ALL FUCKING DAY to leave. And after one delay after another, we weren't going to leave til NOW. But things happened with Kaylyn & Andrew. Yes, things happened to them that are inconvient, but this is my BIRTHDAY ceebration. Friday, October 20, 2006 -9:01am We're leaving after we get Andrew's check at 9:30ish. I should apologize for getting upset, but they should know what this means to me. -11:38am About 30 miles from Houston. We had a lightswitch rave in Deus's car. -11:48am Why did I hear 30 miles when it's 100?! -1:20pm Ding ding ding sploosh Saturday, October 21, 2006 -12:21am (Written by glowstick) Con feels like a bit of a fop, or I'm dissapointed that I only got 2 pictures of Millia. It's nice to be around the people who make me feel wanted. So far, Jenny/Jessy/Bunny (i.e.Swiffer's ex) was the only one to Page 17 come through on a birthday present. I suppose I shouldn't expect much. I felt ike I was an important part of the Pose Off. I moderated 3 times (5 poses total) I ran into Hillary (someone I met @ Ushicon vicariously through Wuffers). I forget how adorable she is untill I see her at cons. She kissed me o nthe cheek and I politely retunred it. This is rendered me conused. Rip and I are the only ones in the room. I wonder where everyone else is. I think I'll watch anime and then retire for the evening. I wanna see Hillary tomorrow. I hope my namesake goes over well. Holding this light in my mouth wories me, as I can taste the batteries. -10:01p Nothing for the rest of the day. Found a video game photo shoot. Later on went to eat with kevin before watching the cosplay. My friends in Boom Presentations (Whitney, Chels-hime, Lily-nee, Will, and Remy) won best skit. I'm in thier room now 'celebrating'. I recall Chels-hime saying she had a present for me. She's changing now. Monday, October 23, 2006 -8:35a I mistakenly packed my diary Sunday, so everything is recap. And depending on what happens as I write it, could come out in the wrong order. -Saturday, 10:30pm approximately I got back to the room, not having any business at a masqurede, and had no inspiration to go elsewhere. Danzig & Kim returned and we watched Trinity Blood & Bleach. We wend with Subaru to thier friends's room. Somewhere between leaving to thier room and returning, my badge vanished. Page 18 -Sunday 9:30 am approximately Went through my things over and over. No badge. -Sunday 11:30am approximatelly Moved things to Kaylyn/Andrew/Deus's room. Went wandering with KimZig, Chels, Whit, Lily et al. This is about the point I realize I packed my diary. -Sunday 11:50am approximately Andrew cas to get my things moved to the car. I never make it ^(in time) as I'm trying to get my present from Chels. She'll be shipping it later. < footnote in Japanese > -Sunday 2:00am approximatelly Canuck gives me my present. Now how will I put it on the wall? -Sunday 12:00pm approximately Packing of KimZig's car completes. Generic chill time ensues. We need more time like this. It's like a chat room, but in person. Maybe we a need webcams to have a video conference. Sean gives me a random badge. I'll write Zappa on it later. -Sunday 1:45pm approximately Why's everyone over there? Did I do something wrong? -Sunday 2:02pm KimZig and party must leave. Everyone says goodbye and parts ways. I find the roomieds and we go to the arcade. We're waiting for closing ceremonies before leaving -Sunday 3:45pm approximately I'ts cold. < Japanese scribbles. The kanji for fire appears here > Page 19 -Sunday 4:15pm approximately We leave after getting some final shots for DoomCon. We stop a few times and I message Ukyou a few times along the way. -Sunday 9:17pm approximately We're home. I get a suprising 'wecome home' from Ukyou. I was missed THAT much? -Sunday 11:30pm approximately Passed out -Monday 9:40am (present) Done catching up. I had thought Bunny had made me a mix on the Cd she gave me. It's a copy of the new Evanessence. I appriceate the gift, but I'm pretty dissapointed in the band. I expected more energy, but al that I can focus on is the rather depressing/whiny lyrics. Maybe a few more times around the cd and I can find more than 2 good songs. Work is now -12:30pm < very angrily written Japanese. This consumes 3 lines. > Tuesday, October 24, 2006 -10:00am Forgot to transcribe agian. I'mfinding more and more Japanese footnotes in here. Who's doing this? -Monday 3pm approximately Page 20 Got home after raiding the Japanese food mart, compensating for the snackage I missed (Wow, I wrote that sloppily) Deus has a girl over. I can't remember her name, and frankly, I don't care In a way, I'm jealous of them, acting the day they do... < angry Japanese scribbles > What the hell? I can't erase that. Why, rather, when did I do that? This is VERY concerning. -3:15pm approximately Uhm, anyway, I played Dead rising untill... 11pm I think -8:50pm approximatey The aforementioned Hillary (i.e. Flonne cosplayed at Oni) tracked me down online. She's cute and sweet and all, but my faith/love definately lay wiht Ukyou. -Tuesday 6:45am So, despite what he said, guess who I saw asleep next to Deus? Her. He daid she wouldn't be staying the night... Wonder how he'd feel if I suddenly had Ukyou saying the night in our room, without consent. Wait. I need to NOT fantasize like that. -7:28am Grabbed my Mai <3 Athena figures and took themto work. Wonder why? No really. Why? -2:12pm Heading home after this entry. If she's still there, I'm taking my TV and PS2 to my room and playing. If they're in what is also MY room, I don't care. < Japanese footnote > -2:48pm She and Deus were in my room. I promptly left and played Disgaea. -8:00pm approximately Made a character for a zombie-based roleplay. Appearence-wise it Page 21 is very much Ukyou.

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Monday, October 23, 2006

I'm alive... post tomorrow

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Page 14-15

Page 14 Tuesday, October 17, 2006 -7:25am Woke up smiling. Said 'good morning' to Ukyou and left for work. -approximately 9:30am Called manager for help. I said I couldn't understnad her, and she bitched that she was "supposed to be sleeping". I found myself several minutes later, with my headphones on, and standing with knife in hand. The chip boxes has been violently slashed. No bags of chips were harmed however. -10:22am Got a message from Ukyou. She's going into the hospital. Hope everything's okay. -11:40am I feel so very tired for some reason. But I can't afford to rest. -2:21pm juice,shirt, fabric roses, headphones I'm heading home. I should stop by Wally World and get things. Deus, Andrew, and Kaylyn don't seem anywhere close to done with thier clothing. Not sure if I should help after I'm done, or squander my time till Onicon. I need to get my suitcase from Kaylyn I should finish my clothes today, unless a certian someone calls me online... -2:27pm I tried to leave work without the keys. She's a distratcion even when she's not around. I think I'm going crazy v'v -3:41pm Other drivers make me stabby. -7:38pm I'm certian I can finish today. Andrew is making me hungry, and there's nowhere withing walking distance to get a quick bite. We have ramen as I recall, bu that's inconvient for my 'workstation' (turns to page 15) -8:08pm Theres a footnote in Japanese at the 9:30 entry (due to inability, it is not transcripted into text, but it does appear in writing). It's been done in pen. Did Andrew or Kaylyn do it? Don't know how, as no one was home while I was napping. I'd ask what it says, but that means showing them my diary. -12:50am (Wednesday) I've finished my clothes. All that remains is to double check everything, arrange some wiring for Sword, shave and pack. I think I'll just play Dead Rising untill I'm asked for help. As I had planned, I waited untill after Wuffers's birthday to say anything pertaining to celebrating mine at the convention. I really don't expect anything physical, but I do ask, (and I will go and correct this in the necessary places) that we do NOT sing the traditional birthday thing. If there is going to be singing, I would like someone to have memorized Birthday Deathday by Deathklok. It's less embarassing for me, as the traditional version has gotten quite old. Maybe I have matured a little bit. Off to shower before a nap and work at the traditional Wednesday schedule. Tomorrow will be much less stressful after work. ~Zappa

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Diary of a Medium (page 13 aparently)

(I've decided to try something a little different. In-character writing. Cuz, for those in the know, one of Zappa's likes is keeping his diary.) October 16th, 2006 -3:36pm: It's certainly been a long time since I wrote anything here. In a way, it feels like I haven't been myself lately. I guess I'll reflect back on the day up untill this point. -approximately 3am: I'm not sure how to properly address it, but I was dreaming, but at the same time, I was aware of 'reality'. Somewhere between a dream and awake. I could tell that I should probally give in and open my eyes, but... I couldn't move, or wake. Then I just sat up. I couldn't tell if Deus was suprised by it or not, because he seemed rather indulged in a pretty game of paper-rock-scissors. -approximately 7:30am: I had to wake up for work. Taking a shower and getting all my things together took much longer than usual. I didn't wash my hair today, and I forgot to brush my teeth agian. I really need to break that bad habit. -8:30am: I was late for work, thanks to traffic. Today wasn't going to be good at all. There was an error in the paper work that my manager look over this weekend. So, why did I notice it and she didn't? I hate responsiblility. -approximately 12pm: Our field representative arrived for the monthy inspection. She shows up to make sure we're doing what we're supposed to be, following the proper procedures, making sure the proper advertisements and displays are up and proper. Of course, there are things wrong with the store that we have no controll over, but being the one in charge for the shift, I'm still the one that gets come down on because they're wrong. If I could replace and update the neon sign myself, I'd have done it by now, but that's for the higher-ups. I'm still being 'reprimanded' for it, so someone above me isn't doing thier job. -approximately 1:30pm: I literally tore the bandage off my pinky while removing some gloves. I was being forced... and I do mean FORCED, although this is regular practice under normal circumstances, to wash hands every time I went from the register (handling money) to the line (making sandwiches). As per the norm, getting a bandage wet, no matter how effective and effificent the bandage, will weaken the bond. So, after washing and washing, it tore off. It hurt, but it didn't bleed. I decided to show my field rep. my injury to show her why I wasn't being consistent in washing my hand today. SHE seemed rather adamant that I needed to take it to get professionally treated. Granted there is never a point in which the cut doesn't look horrible, it's actually not that bad, and healing naturally quite well. After it's been bandaged, it looks all puffy and swollen, as it's overly hydrated(?) And as I sit here looking at it as it scabs over, it looks equally horrible, but, that's just the nature of scabbing. I've never seen an injury scab over prettily. -approximately 3pm: I arrived home, and after checking up on others' journals and a few image sites, something told me I should take a walk. I messaged Kaylyn that I'd be going for a walk, as she was sleeping. Everything is blank between then and walking back in the door. It's not a lack of memory, it's just... like time slipped away from me. I got my laptop and walked back to where I am now, and began typing (you can see above when I begun typing.) Kaylyn was awake when I got in the door. I'm not sure if she said anything to me, cuz my headphones were blaring. She waved goodbye as I left with my laptop. I wonder if she thinks that I'm mad at her? DID I do something wrong? -3:54pm: I've never been over here untill today. I would guess it's some sort of restraunt, but right now, it's closed. There a couple cars parked at the back, which is where I've decided to sit, in the case I'm not welcome. Well, a friendly gentleman just walked by and told me the place is open. I still don't know what the place is, and I don't know why he didn't tell me. He seems to be looking the place over. I wonder what for. I think I should head back soon. I've only got 3 afternoons/evenings to work on my clothing. I hope people like the work I've put into them. It took me the entire afternoon just to finish one of the larger pieces. In retrospect, the way I did it was much more complicated than it needed to be. And there was a lot of backtracking and repairing, as well as the distractions of friends and roomates. It'll be much easier today. If I get started right away, I could possibly finish the entire outfit today, leaving the next two days to get things pack and prepared. I know I still have some shopping to do. -4:03pm I'm heading home, people from this building keep driving by and it's making me really nervous. -4:39pm I've recieved 2 messages from Ukyou. She wants me online... and as I was about to get more soda. -5:47pm My scissors tried to cut a piece of my hand out. On top of that, I found another cut on my left index finger. How'd that get there? -6:24pm Ukyou... wow... just wow... -9:43pm Kaylyn returned from work. Andrew's cell phone isn't working properly, and it kind of irritated her. We went out to eat. -10:11pm Karma has decided to flood in my direction. Though some would call it FATE, I personally despise that wench, and I wish nothing to do with her. Karma is my friend, not FATE. -12:13am (Officially Tuesday) I believe it's time for bed. There were a few discra... okay, rather one large distraction that kept me from finishing anything tonight. I made progress, and I belive that today (or tomorrow depending on when you read this) I can finish a good deal at work. It's not really a lot of work, simply time consuming due to the thickness of the fabric. No matter, I should finish today, leaving Wednesday to pack, and purchase that which I'm lacking, primarily juice. And to the dreamscape I go. I hope to see her there. ~Zappa

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Thursday, October 12, 2006

Song= Through Glass - Stone Sour *sigh* So... things are complicated. That's all I'm going to say about it. People who know and care, will know what I'm talking about. I have a pretty good idea what I'm gonna do from here... but... it's just complicated. I wanna be happy, and I kind of feel it, but at the same time... I just want to cry, I feel it there, but nothing happens. ~Zappa

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Song= Vitamin R - Chevelle I'M NOT DEAD YET! Zappa: So... I keep forgetting to post stuff... Thursday, I think... or last Tuesday... I finished Millia. Wednesday, I worked on Kaylyn's shirt. Did the whole thing at work... I forget the rest of the day, but there was no cosplay work. Thrudsay (for sure), I filled my perscription for my contacts. I should get them today or tomorrow. I got back into Disgaea cuz Andrew kept playing Phantom Brave. Kaylyn plays Surge of Derberus out of something similar to spite. No cosplay work at all. Friday... something happened... I finished Kaylyn's shirt at work. I've been busting ass at work so I have time to work on costumes. It seems to work nicely, as I work better at work than home... a nice lack of distractions. Saturday, there was a PockyMan here! We went to Ingram where Deus got an XBox 360 and Dead Rising... Like I don't have enough distractions. I stayed up till 5am when I had to work at 9. Dammed zombie games. Sunday... I don't recall much... there was roleplaying, zombies and food. Lazer Tag too! Why do I keep forgetting everything when I come to type but I remember it before hand? Monday, more cosplay at work. More roleplaying and zombies at home. Dead Rising is violently awesome. Tuesday... oh god... friggin... AWESOME way to end a day. Cosplay at work, most woot... and finished my ninja shirt at home. All's left is some paint for Kaylyn's shirt and any remaining work for Zappa. Which, while not really a lot, it's time consuming. I behaved and didn't touch any video games. I think I had something more to talk about before I get to the awesome of the day. It rained... that was nice, not having to deal with the sun.. but... cold makes me sleepy, and the sin sun shining at me makes me exhausted/tired. So... no break for me... Anywho... as per the nightly thing, there was AIM chat. I ended up creating a room of my own, with the same name as the usual one, cuz I wasn't getting invites. Not that I wasn't being sent them, it cuz I just didn't get them. Meh... but... two rooms, same people (partially) same name... kinda odd... espeically since I didn't know what the chat name was. BACK ON POINT! Certian people, girls, are suprisingly nice to me... like... affectionately. Not that it's what they feel, but it's how they are. Anywho... one in particular, I don't know her name, so I ask... and we get to talking... and talking... and... essentially some light flirting. She makes Zappa happy. Sadako: So, you like her? Zappa: Simply, yes. I don't know if that came across... but... well... I hope something develops. I would be MOST pleased. Point being... or rather... just the present state of things, as I'm not MAKING a point... is thinking about her makes me happy. On a note I don't wish to add to LJ, god she's pretty too. ~Zappa

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Thursday, October 5, 2006

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Tuesday, October 3, 2006

Song= Panic Prone - Chevelle 16 days to work on 4 costumes. Millia is next to done. One sleve border and the bottom buckles. Need to fix up shirt for Kaylyn's MarzGurl cosplay Need to add colors to ninja shirt Zappa: Extend shirt, make shorts, make pockets, make sword... if there's more, I'll know when I get to it. I've resloved to do another 'first-time-ever' cosplay. Also, its' a cosplay that's of someone BIGGER than my physique. I'll be the first one doing it, CUZ of his physique.. but... I'll do it as best I can... and hopefully good enough to be recognized for it. Same for my Strider Hien. I also figured out when I can do Akiha, and it'll be at Ikkicon... 2 recorded Akiha cosplayers on Cosplay Lab... neither of which too good in my opinion. One did good outfit, but no wig, other had wig but didn't look good. Ah well... we'll see how I do. For a guy I crossplay a lot... I don't care... but... am I of rare form? ~Zappa

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