Wednesday, April 18, 2007

   Life is a real Bitch...
I'm starting to hate life more and more each day. My eyes are fricken killing me cuz I've been crying. I get this pulling sensation and its really painful to look up or at a computer screen. And I have a kick ass headache.

I was crying cuz my mom was being her usual old self and didn't let me go to this anime convention in Rochester, New York. I thought that I would be able to go to my first-ever anime conventions, and instead of hearing other people talking about them, I could talk. I don't know what led me to think that she would actually let me go. Probably the veil of happiness and excitement.-__-
My uncle said he could take me, but my mom was all," You can bother people like that," and " His wife, your aunt, will worry about his sleeping habit." Asian people do this a lot. Through the whole conversation, I kept thinking of how selfish I was and how amazingly embarrasing I was to my family. I don't like crying in front of people, but it happened anyway. The only person who could ever make me cry is my mother. She has this thing about her that would always make me feel guilty or sad.
We were at the doctor's office when I started crying. LOL I went to the restroom and started kicking and punching the wall. Which wasn't a very good place cuz my mom heard me and came in. She cursed at me in Cambodian and went out. I was embarrased, but hitting the walls made me feel much better.

Now I have to tell my friend that we won't be going. My mom says that she would take me to the one in Phily in June. But that one is all about American comics, like X-Men or Spider-Man. I'm not interested in stuff like that!
My parents work most of the day and never get enough rest, which is why I never want to go out with them so that they can rest. I understand that they work hard so that I could have a good life, but I hardly ever see them for more than 4 hours in a day. And if I do, they are always sleeping or too grouchy to have a decent conversation with me.

My life, to me, is a bitch. I want to curse this bitch out so much because it is never on my side. I'm generally a good kid, compared to my younger siblings, but they get whatever they want even though they act like damn brats, and I can't even get a frickin' thank you for yelling at them and setting them straight. I hate being the oldest. Life is a Goddamn bitch. No offense to those deeply religious.
School is the only place where I can be a real kid. I don't have to worry about my bratty-ass siblings and I have my friends for support.

*sigh* My head is pulsing now end my eyes ache. Thank you to anyone who read this post, though I would understand if you skipped out on most of it. My life isn't very interesting.*ha*

I hope you all have a wonderful day.^^
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