Saturday, November 25, 2006

Another
Not really much has been going on lately. Aside from the usual crap that happens that is.
Well, anyone who reads my posts know that when I really think about something, I really get into it and I usually just end up pissing myself off in some way about the idiotic things that people do. I hate complaining about all the stuff that I complain about. I mean... it's just the internet. Right? People just read this or some of my other posts and think that I'm just trying to bring some drama or just complain, and they discard everything that I am trying to say. I really don't know why I make long posts. I suppose it's all about what I said earlier. I really get into it. Whenever I have my opinion, I'm proud to say that I don't usually go unheard. Whether that's a good or a bad thing is your decision I guess. But I feel like I'm rammbling on about something less important. So as I was saying, I think that most people don't believe what I'm saying on here. I mean, a 14 year old girl is usually into things like makeup, boys, shopping, and their family(I think) and I really don't care too much about anything along those lines. I don't make post about how lovely my day was or about how I do my hair or whatever. I feel so much happier typing something... well... that is actually important.

Pathetic as it may seem, it makes me think that I might actually be helping someone. You know, keeping them from feeling like I do. I mean, I know that there are other people out there that think like I do.(God please let there!)

Whether they think as deep as I do or not, I know that they do. I always find myself posting something along the lines of "don't lose your self-esteem". Why? Because it pisses me off to see so many people, who I know are good people, make themselves feel inferior to some other person simply because other people tease them. Why would you care about what some other person thinks about you? Its your life, not theirs. Don't let them control it.

But again, I feel like I'm attacking a whole other subject, I'm almost changing the subject again. But as I was saying(way up there), I feel like people really don't take me seriously. If you're a really close friend of mine, then you KNOW that I say what I mean, and I mean what I say.

I try, and actually do make myself think that I'm "changing" someone with my posts. I know, I know. That sounds very stupid. But just dreaming that hopefully there is one less person out there in the world that is so selfish, or greedy, or miserable, really makes me... happy. I mean, mabey someone who read one of my "self- esteem" posts finally realized that other people's opinion don't matter. Or mabey someone learned that the internet chatrooms are dirty places, or that the Wiggles are really depressed people whom we should kill. Anything like that I guess. -_-'

I feel like I will be getting a lot of PMs saying that I am way too dramatic about this. This is how I am. This is how I express myself on here. If you think it's "dramatic", then that is your problem.

Wow. Most of my posts have a "lesson" somewhere in them(Unless of course, they are pointless random things I say). I usually tell the lesson over and over again in the post too. But I really do hope that the people who read this comprehend everything that I'm saying. This post had no lesson I guess. I just felt... like saying what I did. I'm proud to say the weight of it all is off me... for now I suppose.

I know. This was a long post...

but thanks for reading...
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